The Super Mega Radically Awesome Life of Toph & Co
by RanstaObscurisity
Summary: AU- A school story featuring the Gaang. Everyone realized that Toph was a force to be reckoned with when she concussed a kid on the second day of school... She'd waited too long to be let out into society, and hell if she wasn't making an impact.
1. Toph is a Powerhouse

**This was originally supposed to be a oneshot, but I decided to divide it into chapters because it was getting too long.**

**(Eventual) Pairings are: Taang, Zutara, Sukka. There may be more. Rated T for Potty-Mouthing and References to Adult Activities.**

**Disclaimer for the Rest of the Story: I don't own Avatar. This may come as a great surprise to you all.**

**Toph's nickname is from Stormbenders. Which is an awesome story. If you haven't read it yet, go do it. Cavedweller.**

Day 75

"... And so, you take the third theorem and apply it to the situation. Since the measure is already given to us, you simply have to prove it. Do you understand what I'm saying, Toph? ... Toph? Toph?"

Toph jerked out of her daydream and back to attention.

"Huh? Sorry, Sweetness, I was imagining I was someplace else. What were you saying?"

Katara sighed, dropping the pencil.

"Toph, you have to pay attention to what I'm saying! Your exam is coming up in three days. You won't be able to pass if you don't prepare!"

Toph huffed and reclined in her chair, putting her feet up on the desk beside her.

"Come on, Sweetness. I'll study later. Can we just take a break for now? I wanna walk around and actually see, instead of sitting on my ass like this and learning how to calculate... stuff."

Katara rolled her eyes, but packed up her things anyway. Toph heard her bag zip open, and perked up.

"I really get a break? Sweet! Thanks, Katara, I was about to pass out from the lack of sunlight in this dingy classroom."

"How can you-"

"It's a joke, Sweetness, lighten up."

* * *

(flashback plz)

Day One:

Toph had transferred to the school today, and her arrival had been highly anticipated by the entire student body. The Academy was a prestigious school, and transfers in the middle of the semester were highly irregular. A student whose mother worked as one of the school receptionists had received a few tidbits of information about this new student- that she was from the incredibly wealthy Bei Fong family, that she was homeschooled since she was young, and that (this was the subject of gossip for months) she was disabled. She, however, had apparently been extremely successful in getting over said disability (some said that essays were written about her)- so much that she had been allowed to go to a regular school instead of one for "people like her."

With these rumors, the students came to expect a tall, graceful and shy young woman in a wheelchair to come sweeping into their classroom at any given moment. Instead, they got short, boyish and confident Toph. The teacher had just ushered her into the classroom one day- there was no spotlight, no breeze causing her hair to wave, nothing. She was short (at first glance, she looked like a freshman), almost tiny, but the way she stood and held herself made her seem bigger than the rest of them. She held a walking stick that would have been extraordinarily elegant did it not appear as though it had been run over by a truck multiple times. She stood at the front of the classroom, hand on her hip, and looking straight ahead at nothing at all. She was blind.

It soon became very apparent that Toph was not someone to underestimate. During lunch, she had sat outside alone in the courtyard to eat. Most students avoided her, except for the school's resident asshole, Tomo, who had decided to pester her. He walked up to her with a smug grin on his face, while other students watched, wondering what would happen. What he had actually _said_ was unclear, but the next thing anyone knew, Toph had stood up, grabbed her walking stick, and had swung it around and hit the side of Tomo's face. An enormous CRACK! resonated throughout the entire courtyard, and everyone went silent. Toph had time to laugh at Tomo's high pitched screams before the teachers came running out.

* * *

Fact: Toph received a week's worth of detention on her second day of school (were her parents less influential she would have been expelled).

Fact: Tomo received a concussion, and was hospitalized for a week. He was hospitalized for another three days after purportedly asking Toph for a rematch after his release.

Fact: Katara befriended Toph on her fourth day of school, saying something about Toph being one of the most respectable and toughest girls in school (she too had been a victim of Tomo's immaturity).

Fact: Toph tried very hard to pretend as though she wasn't touched by those words. Katara understood.

* * *

Day Six:

"OOF! Geez... That hurt... Oh crud- I'm sorry! I'm sorry, are you okay? I didn't mean to knock you over, I'm so so sorry, I wasn't looking I-"

"_Shut it_, Twinkletoes. I'm fine. Get off me so that I can actually get up."

"I'm really really sorry, though. I... Hey wait a minute... Aren't you the new student? Toph, right?"

"Yes, I'm the blind kid. You're going to be the crippled kid if you don't get off and fast."

"Oh, right, right, sorry. Nice to meet you! Hope you like the school! Hey, what do you have this period? I have P.E., and it's one of my most favorite subjects. Do you play sports? I like sports! Especially track. Do you like track? What is it like being blind? Crud, sorry, that was really rude of me, I'm really sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"What's your name, Twinkletoes?"

"Uh, Aang."

"Aang, you talk too much."

"Oh, sorr-"

"You apologize too much, too. Do you even _have_ a backbone?"

"S- Oh yeah, right. No more apologies."

"..."

"..."

"P.E."

"Huh?"

"I have P.E. right now."

"Really? That's so awesome! We have a whole class together! This is gonna be great, I gotta introduce you to my friends, especially Sokka, he'd love to see you, because he heard a lot about you and stuff but he never even got to see you and he was really disappointed but now he's going to be really excited that you're in his class..."

* * *

Day Eleven:

"Hey! You the teacher around here?"

"Hello, you must be Toph. Katara told me you'd be coming. My name is Suki, and yes, I teach at this dojo."

"The Kyoshi style, right? I wanna join!"

"Err..."

"Why, is there a problem? I'm blind, not stupid."

"No, no, it's just... that was rather straightforward."

"You gonna teach me or not, Fangirl?"

"How did you know I was holding a-"

"_Ahem_."

"A-alright. Have you any experience with martial arts?"

"You bet. Learned Hung Gar Kung Fu from an expert! I know it's not the style you guys use here, but I like to think of myself as a master."

"Sigh. Well, why don't you give me a quick demonstration of what you know?"

Toph grinned in a way that gave Suki shivers.

* * *

Fact: Toph began teaching kids Mantis Kung Fu at the same dojo as Suki starting that Wednesday.

Fact: She is both the most and the least popular teacher at the dojo. She was the most popular because she knew what to teach and how to teach it, and least popular due to the sheer number of injuries occurring per lesson.

Fact: Suki invited Katara and Toph over on Thursday. Toph reluctantly agreed, but only because Katara demanded so. Even _she_ didn't want to get on Katara's bad side. She was considerably touched when she found out that the slumber parties had been between Katara and Suki for years until now.

* * *

Day 13:

As per Slumber Party Tradition (created by Suki and Katara years ago), the girls sat on the soft, carpeted floor of Suki's room, eating mint chocolate chip ice cream out of the carton and played Truth or Dare Extreme (which is much more radically awesome and ridiculously convoluted than the typical game of Truth or Dare).

"Truth. I can take anything you pansies throw at me."

Suki and Katara grinned (Toph did not notice).

"Is or was there any guy you've ever been really, really close to?" Katara asked.

Toph was silent for a bit while Katara and Suki giggled.

"There is this one guy..." Toph said, and the seriousness of her tone silenced the two girls.

"Don't get me wrong, I don't like-like him or anything, but he's been there for me for a really long time. We both had nancy-families. You know, high-class and all that crap. Neither of us really liked the wishy washy lifestyle, but we both had to stick to it. I guess that's why we're so close. Whenever something went wrong, we'd depend on each other. He's my Big Bro. But while my parents are total... I dunno... they're kinda soft, I guess you could say. But his parents, or at least, his dad... Man... His dad was a monster. My life stayed the same, while his just kept going worse. We promised we'd always help each other out and all, but I can't really do anything to help him. His asshole dad makes his life a living hell, and all I can do is watch..."

For a moment, sadness appeared in Toph's gray eyes. She looked smaller, and more vulnerable... which was terrifying, considering how tough she always was. Katara scooted closer and hugged her, while Suki patted her back. Toph looked a bit uncomfortable at the sudden contact, but a ghost of a smile traced her lips.

"Thanks guys." she said softly, before straightening up. "Alright, I thought this was a slumber party, not a funeral! Suki, truth or dare! You better hurry up!"

"Umm, uh, err..."

"Your ten seconds is running out! Katara, quickly, prepare the scotch tape!"

"Stop it and let me think!"

"Four... Three... Two... One!"

"Dare! Wait, dare!"

"Hahahaha, too late! Your ten seconds is up! This is Strike Two, and you know what that means!"

"Oh dear God, Toph, please, no!"

"I'll hold her down, Sweetness! Didja get the scotch tape?"

"Here you go!"

"Kat, you traitor!"

"Sorry, Suki!"

"Sugar Queen, quickly, she's getting up! Get the lightbulb and the post it notes!"

More squeals and giggles filled the room, as the night slowly progressed.

* * *

Fact: The Slumber Party was a great success, and Toph became a core member of the group ever since.

Fact: Toph would not be the last addition to the group.

Fact: Truth or Dare Extreme was rewritten into a slightly less complex game after the blackout that occurred in Suki's entire apartment.

* * *

"... And it was SO much fun! But then the power went out because of all the extension cords we had to use, so we decided to stop playing and play Monopoly Extreme instead. It's like Monopoly, only you get to rob the bank, hold hostages and break out of jail and stuff."

Zuko chuckled softly, holding the phone to his ear as he played with a lighter.

"It sounds like you had a lot of fun, Champ."

"Yup! We even talked about _you_, Sparky!"

"Really? A bunch of good looking girls at a slumber party talking about me. I hope you mentioned how unbelievably attractive I am." Zuko said sarcastically.

"Oh stop it, Sparky, you're hotter than you think you are."

"Of course _you'd_ know, right, Champ?"

"Duh. Nothing escapes these eyes of mine. But seriously, don't you wanna know what I said about you?"

"No way! You probably mentioned something embarrassing. Like the Snowcone Incident."

"I'd never!" Toph said sweetly.

Zuko's eyes narrowed, and he straightened up a bit in his seat.

"Toph..." he said dangerously.

"Relax, I didn't. Although you have to admit it was pretty funny."

"I'll admit."

"Crud, Mom's coming. Probably going to try to get me to be more girly, again. But I won't let her evil ways corrupt me!"

"Careful, Agent Blind Bandit. The ways of the Mistress are cunning. It will take every bit of intelligence to defeat her."

"Won't let the Rebellion down, Blue Spirit, sir. Blind Bandit over and out!"

With that, she hung up, and Zuko put down his phone with a sigh. No more distractions. He looked at the picture of his family in front of him. The only family picture he hadn't gotten rid of, because it was the only picture left of his mother. She was smiling, young, beautiful. He stared at the harsh face of his father, and then the slightly softer eyes of his sister. Finally, he looked at his face in the picture. Both eyes were normal; the left side of his face untarnished. He flicked on his lighter and kept it on until his thumb began to burn.

* * *

Day 15:

"Hey Toph! Can I talk to you for a sec?"

"Don't really see how I'm going to stop you, Twinkletoes."

"It's Aang!"

"I like Twinkletoes."

Aang smiled anyway and sat in front of her. Toph was a bit alarmed at how... open he was.

"I was just wondering, you're blind, right?"

Toph wondered how she could answer this. There was the sarcastic way ("No, Aang, I'm not."), the clueless way ("Blind? Really?") or she could just stare at him blankly until he realized his own blunder. She opted for method number three.

"Okay, okay, my bad. But the thing is, even though you're blind, you can kinda 'see,' right? How do you do it?"

Aang grinned and stared at her, waiting for an answer. Truthfully, Toph was surprised; most people didn't ask questions like that so abruptly. They preferred to ignore her blindness altogether.

"Did I offend you?" Aang asked, the grin faltering.

"... No, I was just... surprised. I can feel the vibrations from the ground. When people move, I can feel it."

"Cooool." said Aang, who began raving about how she should be a superhero or something. Toph tuned out for most of the speech.

Cool? No one had ever referred to that ability as cool, before. When her parents had found out about her "sight," they'd immediately called the doctor, who took tests, who then told other doctors, who took more tests. "Impressive," "Breakthrough," "Curious," they'd called it. Never "cool." Toph vaguely realized that Aang was waiting for her to answer a question once more.

"I'm sorry, what?"

"I said, how do you feel it? The vibrations, I mean."

"I... I dunno. I just can. It's mostly from my feet, though. That's why I don't like wearing thick shoes. I can see better with sandals and stuff, when I can feel the vibrations better."

"Wicked! So why do you carry around a cane?"

"It's 'walking stick.' 'Cane' makes me feel old. And my parents think it'd help me see better. It doesn't really, since everything is sensed by my feet. But they thought they were helping, so... I guess it's okay."

Wow. "I guess it's okay"? Toph- Master of Eloquence. Oh wait, Twinkletoes is talking again.

"... so why don't you just tell them you don't need a cane? I mean, walking stick?"

Toph shrugged. "Don't want them to feel bad. They usually shower me with gifts and stuff to make me feel better, but they never gave me anything that was directly related to my sight. I think it's because they didn't know what to do. They were really excited that they'd finally found some way to help, so I decided to keep it."

Why was she telling him this?

"Plus," Toph continued with a small smile, feeling more like the _real_ Toph, the tough, confident one, "It makes for a really good weapon in times of need."

She swung it around a bit, and was pleased to hear Aang laugh. Huh. Maybe this guy wasn't so bad after all.

* * *

Day 23:

The doorbell rang downstairs, and Katara rushed to prepare.

"Hey, Katara! Your friend is here!" yelled Sokka from the living room. Katara rolled her eyes.

"I never would have guessed! Hurry up and let her in!" Katara shouted.

Today she'd be shopping with Suki and Toph (who only agreed to go because they promised to stop at stores she liked), but due to a slight mishap involving her brother's stupid boomerang and the alarm clock, she'd woken up late. She checked her reflection one more time in the mirror. Her clothes were clean, her hair was tied back and clean, her things were in her purse, and her mother's necklace was fastened securely around her neck. Nothing was out of place, but what if she'd forgotten something?

"Sugar Queen!" It was Toph this time. "Get your sweet ass down here! We're in trouble!"

She rolled her eyes and ran out of her bedroom with her purse in hand. She almost crashed into Suki and Sokka, were screaming at each other at the top of their lungs.

"You immature sexist pig! How _dare_ you speak to me like that! Do you _know_ who I am?" Suki screamed, arms reaching towards his throat. She was held back by Toph, who was trying very hard not to look amused by the situation.

"'Tara! Your friend is PMSing and disturbing the peace!" Sokka yelled angrily, speaking more to Suki than Katara.

Katara glared at her brother before helping Toph drag a writhing Suki out the door and into her car.

"Katara, I love you, but your brother is a dick." Suki said, gripping the wheel and glaring at nothing in particular.

"I agree with you."

Toph simply smiled (oh, how she relished conflict) and made faces at other cars through the window.

* * *

Katara stepped into the elevator, unable to keep the smile off her face. Today had been so much fun; Suki had promised to carry around the bags if Katara bought her new shoes, and Toph had even convinced Katara to listen to her favorite CD's at the music store (they were rather loud). She decided to buy Toph a CD as a surprise gift, and told them to go to the food court in the lower floors without her.

She put the CD in her purse and smiled, waiting for the elevator to reach the bottom floor. It stopped on the fifth, and a boy older than her stepped in. He looked like the kind of guy Katara tried to avoid in school- one of the guys who broke every rule, disrespected the teachers, and was arrested every month. But the one feature that stood out was his face- most of the left side of his face was covered in a huge red scar. She held back a gasp as she unknowingly stared. How did that guy get a scar like that? Did it hurt a lot? Could he see with that eye? Maybe there was a way to get rid of scars like that. Unless it was really serious... Suddenly he turned towards her with a scowl.

"The fuck are you looking at?"

Katara _did_ gasp this time, and was too shocked and offended to be angry. She turned away instead, mumbling an apology. It was met with a silence that grew more and more awkward as the seconds passed by. How rude was that? She almost slapped herself for feeling sorry for him. Katara considered leaving at the next floor just to get away from the tensioned atmosphere when there was a loud creaking noise that seemed to come from all around them. The lights flickered, and there was a huge crashing jerk- both of them fell to the floor- and the lights went out. There was a brief silence, and then-

"W-what just happened?" asked Katara, panic creeping into her voice.

The boy did not answer, but instead let out a muffled groan.

"D-did we... Did we stop? Is the elevator broken?"

"Mmmmph..."

"Oh God... This can't be happening to me..."

Katara stood up, shaking a bit. She must have been _really_ nervous... The floor of the elevator seemed uneven and shaky...

"What do we do? We need to call someone, we need... Where's the emergency button?"

"Mmmmph!"

"Will you _stop_ with the monosyllabic answers?"

She felt a hand grip her thigh- she squeaked and kicked it away.

"You perverted-!" she exclaimed angrily.

She jumped up and moved aside from where she'd been sitting and almost collapsed again; the floor was bumpy here too... Suddenly from beneath her, someone began gasping for air.

"Gasp! Gasp! You- You stupid... idiotic... Gasp..."

"What?"

"You were sitting on the back of my head."

"... Oh! Oh, sorry."

"And now your heels are digging into my spine. Get the hell off."

Katara fumbled around in the dark before finally finding a solid area to stand on.

"Sorry. I couldn't see."

The boy mumbled something that sounded like "stupid bitch" before pulling himself up. Katara glared at him (or at least, where she thought he was).

"I apologized. You don't have to be so rude. And stop _swearing_, you jerk."

"Whatever."

His voice came from somewhere to the left of her, and she quickly turned, blushing at having been facing the wrong way (thank God it was dark).

"Did you lose your watch?" he asked (pft, as if he cared if she lost anything).

"No... ?"

"I think there's a watch in my pocket. Whatever. It's mine now."

There was a fumbling noise, as if he was looking through his pocket. Katara began pacing nervously. The fumbling noises continued. After a while-

"Will you stop digging around your pockets or what_ever_ it is you're doing and help?"

The noises didn't cease.

"Help you with _what_, exactly?"

"I... I don't know! Think of a way to get out of this mess!"

Finally the noises stopped. There was a small clicking noise and a small flame appeared to her right; he was holding a lighter.

"Where's the panel?" he asked. He looked almost menacing in the small, wavering orange light of the lighter.

"What?"

He scowled and roughly pushed her aside ("Hey!"). She'd been standing in front of the buttons. He pushed the emergency button impatiently. Nothing happened. He pushed it a few more times. Nothing. He pushed it furiously, as if he wanted to have it break under his finger. Still nothing. He growled and turned the lighter off. There was a banging noise (did he just punch the wall?) and he spoke again.

"You. You don't like 'improper language,' right?"

"I have a name. And no, I don't."

"I have a name, too. Small world, isn't it. Cover your ears."

"What? Why?"

There was a deep inhale, and before Katara had a chance to ask what the boy what he was doing, he was screaming out a very long list of profanities that made her want to crawl up into a ball and cry. He continued to curse every single deity known to mankind (along with a few political parties and African mammals) at the top of his lungs for another minute before he stopped (panting ever so slightly). Katara wondered if she should be afraid (she'd never even heard of half of those).

"... That was... new." said Katara, feeling a bit unsafe.

"Told you to cover your ears if you can't take it."

"I can take it! I just don't like it."

"You keep telling yourself that."

"You don't have to be so rude!"

"You don't have to be so obnoxious."

There was a longer silence. Her feet started to hurt (why oh why did she wear heels today), so she sat down. She heard him mirror her actions. The seconds stretched into minutes, and her panic ebbed away into boredom. Maybe she'd brought something to entertain herself wi- Her purse! Her phone! How could she have been so stupid? She made a motion to grab it before realizing it wasn't anywhere. She groaned; she must have dropped it when the elevator stopped. Well, the boy had a lighter, she could find it easily.

"What's your name?" she asked the boy.

"Why would I tell you?"

Katara frowned and glared at the origin of the voice.

"Why are you such a prick?" she exclaimed.

"I thought you didn't like 'bad language.'"

"I don't like when people fling it around like it's nothing; that doesn't mean I don't use it when I'm angry."

"Ever hear of hypocrisy?"

He sounded... amused! She glared at... the general area of wherever he was. Instead of answering, she just scowled (she wouldn't stoop to his level, she _wouldn't_). She wouldn't even ask him for favors, the complete ass he was.

"Do you have your phone? We could call someone for help."

"Left it at home. This was supposed to be a brief trip. Where's yours?"

"It's in my purse. It's somewhere in here. And I'm not feeling around the corners for it."

"Do you need a light?"

Katara let out a sigh of relief. He wasn't such a jerk after all.

"Thank you so much, I-"

"Say please."

Never mind.

"What?"

She was seething.

"Don't you have any manners? Say please."

"Who are _you_ to tell _me_ about manners? Don't you realize that if I can get my phone, we can both get out of here and never see each other again?"

"We can't see each other right now. And I dunno about you, but I don't really have any place I've got to be anytime soon." (He was telling a white lie, but anything to piss her off).

Katara decided that attacking him wasn't the best of ideas... at this current situation.

"Please." she grumbled.

"Please what?" he replied. She could almost _see_ the condescending smirk on his face!

"Please can you turn the lighter on." she said, grinding her teeth.

He flicked it on- an inch away from her face. She let out a shout in surprise and jerked backwards; the boy chuckled. She tried to kick his leg, but he moved it aside before she could hit it.

"Asshole." she spat.

"Aww, did the little flame scare you?"

She glared at him. She found herself hating him more than she'd ever really hated anyone. She hated his stupid, arrogant smirk. She hated his stupid, messy hair that almost hid his stupid yellow eyes (contacts, most likely). She hated the stupid lighter in his hand, and his stupid hand covered in burns and small scars. And she especially hated that stupid, stupid scar. How could she have ever felt sorry for this prick?

Turning away, she found the purse by his (stupid) arm. She snatched it away and dug through it. She pulled out her phone hopefully, only to realize it was out of batteries. She'd been so concerned with her totaled alarm clock that she'd forgotten to recharge it. She groaned as hope drained away, and she slumped against the wall of the elevator. Life was just laughing at her today.

The boy across from her pulled out a cigarette and lit it.

No, life wasn't laughing at her. Life was flicking her off and laughing at her offended expression.

"Can you not smoke in here?" she asked (it was more of a command).

His response was to take a long drag and blow out the smoke in her face. She sputtered and coughed for several (long and embarrassing) seconds as he watched (undoubtedly amused).

"Why are you so mean?" she asked angrily (it was so _frustrating_ she thought she would _murder him-_).

"'Cuz you're a total snow queen."

"A what?"

"You heard me. Snow queen. Uptight, prudish, naive, living in her own pure world, sheltered from anything less than perfect. Snow queen."

"Not only is that completely inaccurate, that can't be an actual term."

"Did I mention naive and sheltered?"

Katara turned away and sighed, the only source of light coming from the cigarette. She was surprised when he put it out after a few moments (how did he do it?) but didn't say anything. She imagined her friends waiting for her, and wondered what they were doing now. She imagined that they were trying to rescue her even as she sat there in the dark.

* * *

"That's weird, Kat's twenty minutes late. She won't pick up, either. Wonder what she's doing?"

"Don't worry about it, Fangirl. She's probably trying on a new shirt or something and got stuck in line or something."

"Yeah, you're probably right."

* * *

"How long do you think we've been in here?"

"You're talking to me now, Snow Queen?"

"I have a name, you know. And I'm bored. I might as well talk to _someone_."

"I have a name, too. Small world. And I'm assuming around half an hour."

"Don't you have a watch?"

"Yeah. Don't feel like checking, though?"

"Why not?"

"I don't want to know what time it is, _you_ do."

"You're a bastard."

"I gathered."

* * *

Toph and Suki, meanwhile, were trying out different flavors of ice cream while arguing which flavor was the best.

"Banana was infinitely creamier than strawberry. That's a fourteen, so far."

"But strawberry has chunks of actual strawberries, thus increasing its healthiness by two."

"True, and strawberry was sweeter. So strawberry's ahead by nine points!"

"Let's try chocolate and vanilla, now."

"Ooh, the ultimate battle!"

"We'll look for Katara afterwards. I'm sure she's having fun."

* * *

Katara gave up trying to make him quit- instead, she watched in (reluctant) fascination as the boy played with the lighter- making the flames grow dangerously large to making sparks fly everywhere in a miniature show of fireworks.

"How do you do that?"

"I play with lighters a lot."

He flicked it on and off; she decided it was a habit.

"Are you a pyromaniac or something?"

"I've been accused of such. Several times, in fact."

"... Well? Are you?"

"Maybe."

* * *

"Katara's been gone for an hour, now. Maybe we _should_ look for her." said Toph, looking (feeling) through different mp3 players and wondering which would be the easiest to use.

"After I'm done kicking this kid's ass in Guitar Hero." ("Hey!")

"Sure. She's probably fine, anyway."

* * *

Katara stared at the boy's hand, part of which was currently on fire.

"Doesn't that hurt?"

"Not really. It's just hot. The fire's burning the gas, not me. I'll know when it's burnt through the gas."

"It doesn't hurt... at _all_?"

"I have a lot of burns on my hands. In some places I could put it over a fire for twenty seconds and won't feel a thing."

"Huh."

"Aren't you scared of fire?"

"No."

He suddenly pushed his hand towards her, and she flinched backwards. She angrily kicked him again. Or tried to; he blocked her foot with his (non-flaming) arm. He shook his hand and clenched it into a fist, killing the small fire.

"Will you stop trying to bruise me?"

"How are you doing that?"

"What? Deflecting your incredibly obvious attempts at assaulting me? Maybe if you were more of a fighter, you'd be able to hit me."

"Hmph."

"Do you have any water?"

"Yeah, I always carry a bottle with me."

"I'm kinda thirsty."

"Why should I give it to you?"

"Because my face is utter eye candy. Weren't you admiring my eye earlier?"

"... Is this why you're so mean? Because I was looking at your scar? Well, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done it, I won't ever do it again. Now will you _please_ be civil?"

"Chill, Snow Queen. As much as you eyeing my face pissed me off, I didn't mean that. You should give me water because I spent the last hour entertaining you with my vast array of pyromania-related tricks."

"Oh."

"If the whole thing about making you feel guilty about my scar will get me water, though, I'm all for it."

Katara threw the bottle at him, hoping it would hit him and cause him some sort of pain.

It didn't.

* * *

"We've been putting this off for two hours, now. Katara doesn't take two hours to try on clothes. We've got to look for her."

"Alright. Ugh, looks like the elevator's out of order, again. When will they just replace it? Guess we're taking the stairs. You go that way, I'll keep heading this way, alright?"

"Alright, Fangirl, leave the searching to the blind girl."

"Wh-Wha... I thought you could see! I mean... To an extent..."

"Geez, you people cannot take a joke! Don't worry, I can see better than anyone else in this place can. Bet I'll find her first."

* * *

"Asshole."

"Bitch."

"Bastard."

"Slut."

"How can you be calling me a slut? You don't know anything about me. I never showed slutty behavior once in this elevator. I've never had slutty tendencies in my entire _life_."

"How can you be calling me a bastard? You don't know anything about _me_. I assure you that I'm a legitimate child. My mother and father were legally married and everything."

"That's a completely different term. The term I'm talking about is-"

There was a huge clanging sound that reverberated throughout the elevator. There was a shaky movement (was it the elevator or an earthquake?) and a sudden flash of light- both teens winced and covered their eyes as the power came back on.

There was a ding! and the doors opened- two security guards and a guy with a toolbox were standing there. Katara suddenly realized how odd they looked- Both of them sitting across from each other, an empty plastic bottle and a cigarette butt lying on the ground and the faint smell of smoke in the air.

"Are you kids okay? Sorry we couldn't come earlier- no one reported the problem until a few minutes ago..."

Katara stood up and began thanking them profusely, stepping out of the elevator quickly. The boy got up, put his hands in his pockets and walked out after her.

"Well, that was an educational experience." he said loudly. He turned to Katara. "Hope I never have to see your face again."

He turned around and began walking away before this last bit of rudeness settled in.

"Excuse me, young man, I'm going to have to ask you to stay and fill out a-"

He flicked them all off before turning the corner.

"I-I'm so sorry! I don't know that person, I'm unaffiliated with him, I swear," she babbled on and on, embarrassed and furious at the same time.

"Don't worry about it. I'm used to delinquents like him." said the officer, although he looked offended regardless of his words. "Now, I need you to answer a few questions of what happened..."

* * *

"Champ! Is that you?"

Toph turned around to the source of the voice.

"Sparky!"

She ran and jumped; Zuko caught her and began choking as Toph hugged him a bit too tightly.

"What are _you_ doing here?" she exclaimed excitedly.

"Mmmmph!"

"Oh. Sorry, Sparks." she loosened her hold.

"Ouch... That's the second time today I've nearly suffocated to death."

"Second? What happened? Was... Was it your...?"

"No, no. It had nothing to do with _them_. I got stuck in the elevator with some stupid bitch."

Toph began laughing.

"You got stuck in an _elevator_ with someone? Oh man, what happened? I've gotta hear this."

"Well, I was getting on the elevator, right? First thing I see is this girl, looks totally normal, but she's staring at my scar as if she's looking at some kind of dead animal, which pisses me off, and I can already tell she's the type of condescending chick I hate the most..."

* * *

"Katara!"

"Suki! Where were you?"

"I was looking all over for you!" Suki exclaimed, not mentioning the two hours of goofing off with Toph. "Where were you? You look like you just got run over by a bus."

Katara had spent the last ten minutes answering minute details about the event (No, she was not claustrophobic, no, he did not rape her or sexually abuse her, no, she wasn't diabetic, she wasn't sure how that factored into the whole elevator thing, _no_ he did not rape her or sexually abuse her, she'd answered this multiple times already...)

"Ugh. Long lines. Eventually I decided a shirt just wasn't worth the wait."

* * *

Toph's eyes were brimming over with tears, she was laughing so hard. Zuko chuckled along with Toph, but to a lesser degree.

"Oh man... I wish... I was there... She sounds like such a bitch..." she said with a sigh after the giggles subsided. "I woulda pounded the blue blood out of her."

"Heh, you would have. Who'd you come with, anyway?"

"Oh yeah! Katara and Suki! You should meet them!"

"Oh yeah, your friends. I gotta go in a few minutes- promised a friend I would hang out with him today."

"That's too bad... Suki's awesome! She teaches at the dojo I'm working at now! She's really girly sometimes, but she's tough at the same time, and she's so cool about everything, too! She also has good taste in music. And Katara, oh man, you'd _love_ her! She's really nice. She wouldn't hurt a fly. She bought me new shoes, and she's smart, too. She's trying to teach me math, even though I keep telling her I'm impossible to teach."

"I want to meet Katara. She was your first friend here, right? She just walked up to you and ate lunch with you one day?"

"Yeah, she didn't care I was blind or anything. She wasn't acting awkward at all! She just started talking about how awesome it was that I beat up that Tomo kid, and how she's wished that someone would teach her to do that and stuff. I call her Sweetness."

"She _sounds_ sweet. Too bad I was stuck in that elevator with that bitch- I would have loved to meet her."

"Nice job ignoring Suki."

"I'm not ignoring her! We already- wait, is that your phone?"

"Oh, she must have found Sweetness! I gotta go, see you later!"

* * *

"Hey, Toph, where were you?"

"Sweetness! Fangirl found you! Damn, looks like I lost the race. Sorry guys, I met Zuko on the way here."

"Who's that?"

"My big bro! I told you guys about him, remember?"

"Yeah, but you didn't really give us any details." said Katara.

"Man, pity he had to go- you guys would have loved him! He's really tough- he taught me everything I know about kicking people's asses. He's protective, too, and he never hesitates to protect innocent people from people who're being unnecessarily hard on them and stuff. But he's also super nice, and really, really kind to people."

Katara giggled. "Sounds like you guys are really close! Wish I could meet him."

"Now that you mention it, yeah! You'd love him, Sweetness. Tall, dark and handsome type. I would know, I've felt his face before. He's really sensitive about it though. Thinks he's hideous. Humble _and_ badass. Completely up your alley. He's a total gentleman, too."

Katara pushed her.

"Oh, stop. I said I wanted to meet him, not ambush him at night."

"I wasn't saying anything of the sort, although if that's what you're thinking of..."

"The vision of a sex-crazed Katara tackling people in public places just made my day." sang Suki, grinning.

"I hate you both so much."

* * *

"Zuko! You're finally here! Sokka and Jet are already setting up the table." Aang exclaimed, ushering the boy into his apartment. Appa barked excitedly while Momo simply yawned.

"What took you so long?" asked Sokka, shuffling the cards. "Poker night isn't poker night without Emo King."

"Funny. I got stuck in an elevator with some annoying chick."

"You lucky bastard." said Jet with a grin, toothpick in his mouth. "I'd rather get stuck in an elevator with a girl than play these guys."

"That's because you don't have a very good poker face," said Aang with a broad grin, passing out drinks.

Jet glared at him while the others laughed.

"Nice one, 'Avatar.'" he said sarcastically. "Don't you have anything that isn't soda?"

"You know I'm underage, Jet."

"Zuko and I aren't. Why don't you be more hospitable?"

"No amount of alcohol will improve your playing, Jet."

"Haru? How long were you standing here?" Jet asked, turning around to face the boy behind him.

"About ten minutes. Hey, Zuko."

"Hey."

Sokka was having a heated conversation with Aang.

"You sure you're not pining after my sister anymore?"

"I never _pined_ for Katara! I just, you know, liked her!"

"Are you positive? I'm not lifting the restraining order until I'm sure."

"What restraining order?"

"The Second Clause of the Official Elder Sibling Charter _clearly_ states that if a mutual party of-"

"Wait, your sister's name is Katara?" asked Zuko before Sokka could get into the fine legal details of the Big Brother Code.

"Yeah. How do _you_ know her?" asked Sokka, his eyes narrowing suspiciously.

Zuko held up his hands defensively.

"Relax, we have a mutual friend. She mentioned her."

Sokka stood up quickly, Aang forgotten (he used this opportunity to scooch closer to Jet and further from Sokka).

"I swear, flame boy, if I find out you're making eyes at my baby sister..."

"I'm not making eyes at anyone. I've never seen her before. I was just wondering."

"If you two are done mentally tearing each other apart, can we _play_ now?" asked Jet impatiently.

Zuko rolled his eyes and dug around his pockets for a cigarette. Instead, he felt the watch he'd found from the elevator. He pulled it out. It wasn't a watch- though it had felt like it in the dark. It was instead a necklace- his eyes were drawn to the stone. It was blue and had wave-like carvings. It was pretty, in a simple way. But he had no use for a necklace like this. He put it back in his pocket. Maybe he could give it away or something.

* * *

Katara stepped into her room, tired from the walking and the events that had happened that day. She hesitated before the mirror but decided not to bother looking at her reflection- sleep first. Then care about appearance. She slumped face first onto the bed and fell into a deep sleep almost immediately.

* * *

Day 24:

"Hi Toph!"

"Hey, Twinkletoes."

"You know, I was wondering; why do you call me Twinkletoes?"

"You move around a lot. You don't sit still often. Everytime the wind picks up you're moving somewhere else. Thus, Twinkletoes."

"Oooh, that makes sense! What's your favorite sport?"

"That was... awfully random. And I dunno about sport... I've never played one before."

"Really? But you're so fit... Do you work out or something?"

"... Are you coming on to me or are you naturally this shameless?"

"... Wha?"

"Never mind. I guess I do work out. I mean, I teach martial arts."

"Really? I do martial arts too!"

"... Seriously?"

"Yeah! Why, you don't believe me? I'm actually pretty good!"

He thrust out his chest proudly.

"Although, I don't really like hurting anybody. So I only fight when I reeeeally have to."

Toph couldn't help but giggle at his tone.

"You know, maybe we could spar one day!"

Toph stopped laughing.

"You're not afraid of beating up a blind girl?"

"You'd probably beat _me_ up! I heard what you did to Tomo! And why do you keep saying that? Talk about you being blind, I mean. You're capable of 'seeing,' and you know you're strong. If it doesn't bother you, why should it bother me? Not to mention you're super tough."

"... Sorry, Aang. I'm used to people underestimating me because I'm blind. I had to deal with it for the greater half of my life. Especially by guys. I'm sorry I threw you in the same category as the rest of them."

"..."

"What's the deal? You look like I just slapped you. Never heard an apology before?"

"N-no! It's just, this is the first time you've called me Aang."

"Don't get too cozy with it, Twinkletoes. That's a mistake I won't make again."

* * *

"'Tara, shouldn't you be asleep by... Katara? Katara? What's wrong, why are you crying? Are you okay? What happened?"

"I-It's g-gone..."

"What's gone? What? Katara, damn it all, talk to me!"

"M-m-mom's n-necklace... I th-think I lost it at the m-mall... S-suki and Toph d-don't have it, and, and, oh God I'm s-such an _idiot_"

"Ssh... Calm down, 'Tara, it's alright. It's just a necklace."

"No! I-it's not! I-it w-was Mom's necklace! It w-was the only th-thing we had left... I promised I-I'd take good c-care of it..."

"It's okay, Katara, it's okay... We have each other, right? We don't need a necklace to remember Mom."

* * *

Day 25:

"We meet again, Katara's asshole brother."

"What are you doing here? My baby sister's not home yet."

"She left her keys in my car today. I came by to drop it off real quick."

"Hurry up and go home, then. You should be making dinner or something."

"... What... did you say!"

"Sorry, _ironing_, then. Go home and do the ironing."

* * *

Fact: Katara came home from the swim meet to find her best friend and her brother attacking each other and wrecking the house.

Fact: Suki was winning.

Fact: Sokka began lessons in Kyoshi style fighting with Suki a few days later. He refused to speak of these lessons, but they were decidedly embarrassing.

Fact: Remembering the Elevator Incident, Katara began private Tai Chi Chuan lessons with her grandfather Pakku. She did not want to bother Toph or Suki, and she had threatened to tell her Gran-Gran if he refused to teach her.

Fact: Katara is surprisingly talented. Although why she insists on learning how to hit fast targets was beyond him.

Fact: The absence of the necklace was not forgotten.

* * *

Day 34:

BlindBandit: Sugarqueen? Fangirl? You there?

KyoshiGrl: Toph? How are you... typing?

WtrBend2: Toph? You're typing...

BlindBandit: Actually, I'm making Zuko type while I dictate.

BlindBandit: Say hi, Zuko!

BlindBandit: Hi.

BlindBandit: Isn't he just the wittiest thing?

KyoshiGrl: Hey, Zuko! We've heard a lot about you!

WtrBend2: Hey Zuko! Nice to finally meet you.

BlindBandit: Hey! Does the screenname say "Zuko," or "BlueSpirit" or "Sparky?"

BlindBandit: No, it says "BlindBandit," which is ancient Cherokee for "Toph." Talk to me, you guys. I'm lonely here.

BlindBandit: This is Zuko. You must be Katara and Suki. I've heard a lot about you guys.

BlindBandit: Toph would like for me to apologize for trying to "get in your pants," please tell her I'm not coming onto you, she's hitting me very hard right now and I'm starting to lose feeling in my left arm;ekmf3985hmf;kd

WtrBend2: Toph, Zuko is not coming onto us.

KyoshiGrl: Pity.

WtrBend2: Suki!

KyoshiGrl: It's a joke, Kat, calm down! No Toph, he is not coming on to us.

BlindBandit: He better not be. IT'S TIME I DID SOME PROPER INTRODUCTIONS. Zuko, this is Suki. Suki, this is Zuko.

KyoshiGrl: It's kind of odd considering Zuko's the one typing.

BlindBandit: Shut it.

BlindBandit: That was Toph, typing, I'd like to make that clear...

KyoshiGrl: lol no prob. Nice to "meet" you, Zuko.

BlindBandit: The presence of those quotation marks confuse me. Explain yourself, Fangirl.

KyoshiGrl: He goes to my school. We worked on a project together in eighth grade, once.

BlindBandit: We bonded over the intricacies of gene therapy. We exchanged about four words, but we got an A on the project.

BlindBandit: Imma smack you both for not telling me you guys were buddy buddy.

WtrBend2: Yeah, how come you never mentioned you knew him?

KyoshiGrl: I didn't say I _didn't_. You both automatically assumed I didn't. I simply chose not to encourage or discourage your ideas. We're not really "buddy buddy" either. We are "lightly acquainted."

BlindBandit: Shut it, lawyergirl. Oh right; Katara, this is Zuko. Zuko, Katara. You two would make lovely babies.

BlindBandit: Toph I'm not typing for you anymore.

WtrBend2: Hi Zuko. Tell Toph that I'm not going to make her anymore cream puffs if she keeps making jokes like that.

BlindBandit: After careful deliberation and about thirty seconds of Toph punching my face in, I've decided to continue typing for her. Coincidentally, she is the greatest person in this side of the globe and is also incredibly hot looking.

BlindBandit: Katara, you know you love making me cream puffs. Don't deny it. Why is your screenname WtrBend2?

WtrBend2: Sokka's idea. When we were kids he said I was so good at swimming it looked like the water was "bending" out of the way. He's been calling me "waterbender" ever since. It sounds kiddy, doesn't it? :P

BlindBandit: I think it's sweet. No wonder Toph calls you Sugar Queen.

BlindBandit: I'm sorry for trying to "get in your pants again", please forgive me before I become left-handed for the rest of my life.

WtrBend2: Toph, stop attacking Zuko. You're the one making off-color jokes about us getting together.

KyoshiGrl: Toph, you're ruining my entertainment. I want to see them hook up.

WtrBend2: Toph, stop attacking Zuko. Go attack Suki instead.

BlindBandit: Wow, with all these girls cheering my name, I feel so popular! I can sense Zuko's jealousy. Don't you deny it, mister.

BlindBandit: And Sweetness, it's okay if _I_ make jokes about you two eventually dating. It's _not_ okay if he tries to get in your pants on his own steam.

BlindBandit: Anyway, I wanted to tell you guys that you are invited to my seventeenth birthday party. Thrown by my nancy parents. Exact date is unknown, but I'll tell you guys later.

KyoshiGrl: Sweet! We're gonna party at Toph's mansion!

WtrBend2: Thank you, Toph! This is gonna be so much fun! What do you want for your birthday?

BlindBandit: No need to thank me (especially you, Suki, you grateful friend). My parents are gonna end up inviting a bunch of _their_ friends anyway. It won't be so much of a birthday as it is the annual "Our Daughter is Older" party. And Sweetness, you already gave me a CD last week. Showing up is good enough.

KyoshiGrl: Ooh! I have an awesome idea for a party gift! Muahahaha, the utter ingenuity of the idea makes me rub my hands together in excitement. You can't tell, but I'm doing it right now.

BlindBandit: Hand-rubbing mixed with evil chuckles, eh? That sounds intriguing. I think I'll try it sometime.

WtrBend2: Please don't trap Toph in a closet.

KyoshiGrl: Heeheehee, that was only for you, my dear.

BlindBandit: What? You trapped Sweetness in a closet?

WtrBend2: I swear, Suki, if you tell, I will never ever forgive you.

KyoshiGrl: Weeell... It was her fifteenth birthday party...

WtrBend2: Suki, I'm going to tell them about your scrapbook.

KyoshiGrl: Never mind. I forget what we're talking about.

BlindBandit: Is this because Zuko's here? Because I could easily remove him or erase his memory.

BlindBandit: This is Zuko speaking. Please don't say anything that will lead to my hospitalization.

WtrBend2: Yeah, let's change the subject. What do you want for your birthday, Toph? It won't feel right if I barge in without giving you anything.

BlindBandit: You won't be _barging_, Sugar Queen. And fine; you have to owe me three favors.

WtrBend2: What do you mean by favors?

BlindBandit: Like, you have to do whatever I tell you to. No matter what.

WtrBend2: Within reason, of course. Right?

BlindBandit: Describe "within reason."

WtrBend2: I mean, nothing ridiculous like streaking down the hallways at school or something.

BlindBandit: Damn. There goes my number one dream. I kid, I kid. Sure, within reason. But you _have_ to do it, okay?

WtrBend2: I promise.

BlindBandit: Muahahahaha! Wow, Suki, you were right! These ingenious ideas are making me rub my hands together in delight! Zuko, aren't I rubbing my hands in delight? Tell them about my hand-rubbing shenanigans.

BlindBandit: I vouch for the authenticity of her hand-rubbing, and her facial expression does indeed seem to be that of delight.

WtrBend2: I'm starting to regret this.

KyoshiGrl: Toph, dear, we must join together and plot.

BlindBandit: Yes, we must!

WtrBend2: What have I ever done to you guys?

WtrBend2: If you guys plot, I won't make you anymore cookies. I mean it.

KyoshiGrl: You wouldn't.

BlindBandit: I don't want to waste my favors begging for cookies. But I can't live without them. You are a cruel, manipulative person, Sweetness. I've taught you well.

WtrBend2: No seriously, no plotting. I will burn my recipes.

KyoshiGrl: Toph, dear, we must join together and lightly discuss subjects that may or may not be related to Katara (or similar persons) and hypothetical scenarios that could apply to her if certain conditions were met! _Without_ any sort of intention to actually execute or bring about the completion of said scenarios, of course. Simple musings, is all. No plotting in the slightest.

BlindBandit: Yes, we must! Suki, you should be a lawyer.

WtrBend2: Sighhh.

BlindBandit: Zuko: I know how you feel, Katara.

BlindBandit: Katara I apologize for trying to "get with you," please stop this madwoman before she shatters my ribcage into nothingness.

WtrBend2: Toph!

* * *

Day 35:

"Hey Toph!"

"'Sup, Twinkletoes."

"So, I was thinking, you did really great in soccer today!"

"... I kicked the ball. Four times."

"Yeah, and one of them went in the goal! And two of them hit Mister Zhao. That was really funny!"

"It was, wasn't it?"

"Sometimes it's hard to believe you're blind, I mean, you do all these things that people don't expect you to be able to do, and you're so nonchalant about it, it's really cool!"

"... Huh. Thanks."

"No problem! It's nothing! Hey, you have Advanced English third period, right? Did you understand the poem at all? I didn't get it, at first, because I was thinking of everything figuratively, but then I realized that it was funny because while figuratively it meant nothing at all whereas literally it was making fun of the figurative meaning, which is ironic because-"

"Hey Twinkletoes."

"Yeah?"

"You free this Saturday?"

"U-uh... Y-yeah... W-why?"

"My parents are throwing a birthday party for me. Wanna come?"

"... Oh! S-sure! That'd be great! Thanks so much! What do you want for your birthday? What time is it at? Should I wear something nice? Who else is gonna be there?"

"What's your number?"

"Wha- my- my n-number?"

"Yeah. So I can call you and tell you about the party."

"... Oh! Okay! Sure! Here, gimme your phone, I'll put it in. Thanks for inviting me!"

"No problem, Twinkletoes. You might want to work on that stutter, though."

* * *

Day 38:

"Dare!"

"Umm... I dare you... To ask out my brother!"

"What! Sokka? The sexist pighead I'm teaching?"

Toph shoveled more mint chocolate chip ice cream into her mouth and tried not to laugh.

"Yup! And if you refuse, it's Toph's turn to think of a punishment."

Suki looked over at Toph. She was sitting on the floor with green silk pajamas, her hair in a ponytail and her cheeks bulging with ice cream; yet somehow the girl could still manage to intimidate her as she grinned evilly at the prospect of making up punishments.

"Argh! You really _are_ secretly evil, Katara!" Suki exclaimed angrily. She grabbed her phone and went into the closet. "Fine. I'll do it. I'll explain to him that this whole thing is part of a Truth or Dare game. And when I finish clearing things up, your ass is grass."

"I don't hear you dialing!" Katara said in a singsong voice, taking a spoonful of ice cream.

There was a few minutes of muffled speaking from the closet. Katara and Toph's giggles subsided, and they began to wonder what was taking so long.

"Maybe Sokka's too busy laughing?" asked Toph.

"Or maybe they got in a fight?"

"Or..." Toph gasped. Her eyes widened. "Do you think...?"

Katara stared before gasping as well.

"You... You don't think...?"

The closet door suddenly opened, and both girls whipped their heads around. Suki was blushing furiously. She put the phone down and sat down, staring into space. There was a long silence, and then-

"Looks like I just got a date."

* * *

Fact: Toph was quite amused by this entire situation. She thinks playing matchmaker is almost as entertaining as beating people up (almost). This will be important later.

Fact: Both Suki and Sokka began pestering Katara about the other. Her eagerness to help soon gave way to irritation ("How am _I_ supposed to know if she likes you better with your hair down?" "No, Suki, I don't know about what kind of underwear Sokka wears, nor do I care to find out").

Fact: The two had an awkward lunch, a somewhat awkward movie, and a fairly good talk at the park.

Fact: The two began dating afterwards. Sokka made sure everyone was aware of this.

* * *

Day 40:

Suki marveled at the enormous room where Toph's party was being held. It was four times as big as her apartment... And it was only _one_ room.

"I thought you said you didn't live in a big house!" she exclaimed, faking anger. She slapped Toph's arm with her fan.

"I don't! This is not a big house. It is a manor." Toph retorted in her Formal Voice. Today was going to suck. Although she couldn't see what she looked like, her hair was down and she was wearing a dress and she was _sure_ she looked like a total snob and these shoes hurt like a _bitch_ and it was kinda hard to see...

"Pft. And you say _I'm_ the lawyer." Suki said. She scanned the crowd- half of them were adults (probably Toph's parents' friends), and only a few of them were their age (and they didn't look as though they knew who Toph was). "Isn't Kat here yet?"

"Oh, Sweetness probably overslept again. You know how she is. She basically rises with the moon."

"I know what you mean. I remember the first time she slept over. I woke up and started freaking out, I thought she was comatose or something..."

* * *

Zuko heard the raucous laughter he'd learned to recognize and smiled. _Toph_. He walked towards the punch table where she and another girl were cracking up.

"Champ!"

Toph spun around. "Sparky!"

She began to run towards him but almost fell over.

"Fuck! These things fucking _hurt_!" she exclaimed angrily, clutching the end of the table, glaring at her feet. Zuko decided now was not the best time to laugh.

"The hell are you lookin' at?" Toph spat at a boy who was staring at her. "Never heard a damsel in distress scream in pain?"

The boy quickly walked away.

"You alright, Champ?" asked Zuko, waiting for the hate speech against heeled shoes to begin.

"Are you kidding me? Who invented shoes with heels anyway? I'll beat the shit out of him! Unless he's dead. Then I'll carve nasty things into his gravestone! One way or another, _I will have my revenge_, and _nothing_ will stop me or get in my way-"

"Hello, Zuko."

"Hi, Suki."

Toph forgot her anger for a moment.

"Oh yeah! You guys are friends! Come on, you two stand next to each other and drink punch. I'm going to go wait for people I actually know to come in. You guys can muse recent developments in gene therapy together."

With that Toph began walking (waddling painfully) towards the entrance, getting people out of the way by smacking their shins with her walking stick.

* * *

"... So."

"... Yeah."

"You... Know Toph for long?"

"Yeah. Guess she's like my little sister."

"Cool. You... live near here?"

"You could say that."

"Cool. Cool."

"Yeah."

"..."

"..."

"You... uh... you do the Physics homework yet?"

"No. I gotta do that. Later. Yeah."

"Me too."

"Yup."

"Mmhm."

"..."

"..."

"Want to help me conspire against Toph?"

Zuko smiled in a way that gave Suki shivers. They really _were_ siblings.

* * *

"Is that you, Twinkletoes?"

"Hey To...ph..."

"... Twinkletoes?"

"..."

"Twinkletoes."

"..."

Toph hit him with her walking stick (the constant abuse explained how battered it looked).

"Ow! Sorry, sorry, I was spacing out for a second."

"I know, I know, I have a big house, try not to give yourself an aneurism."

"No, it's not that, although you do have a big house. I mean, you look really pretty."

"... Are you making fun of me?"

"What? No! I would never! For one thing, you'd probably kill me, and-"

"I'm going to pretend you never said anything about how much of a pansy I look right now. Come on, I've got people to introduce you to."

* * *

"Sparky, Fangirl! I would like you to meet Twinkletoes, my newest friend. He followed me home one day and I decided to keep him."

"Zuko? What are you doing here?"

"Hi, Aang."

Toph stared incredulously.

"You know him, Sparky?" she exclaimed, pointing (slightly to the left) at Aang. He moved over a bit so that her finger was actually directed at him.

"Yeah! I go to his house often."

"Argh!" Toph tried to hit Zuko (he caught the stick). "Are there any other friends of mine that you're already friends with? Sokka? Kuei?"

"I know Sokka!" exclaimed Aang. "And so does Zuko!"

Toph tried to hit Aang, but he jumped out of the way.

"Hold still, Twinkletoes. I'm a bit miffed, since I've never been able to introduce anyone new to Sparky here. Here I was hoping I could show him that I was able to make _new_ friends."

"Oh, relax, Toph." said Suki, who kinda wanted to see some male abuse. "You can still introduce-"

"You! That's right! Twinkletoes, this is Suki. Fangirl, this is Aang."

"Hi Suki! Nice to meet you! You must be Sokka's girlfriend! He told me a lot about you."

"Hello, Aang. Sokka talks about me, huh? What does he say?"

"Oh man, where to begin..."

Toph turned to Zuko, ignoring their conversation.

"How did you meet Aang anyway?"

He turned red and was thankful she couldn't see him.

"Oh. Um... Stuff... happened."

"Zuko used to beat me up." quipped Aang from behind Toph.

"You did?" Toph glared at him.

"Well... yeah. But things were different back then! You remember. I was more... angry. But I apologized like crazy, and he forgave me for being a dick."

"Really. And what brought about this change?"

"I'll... I'll tell you later."

"Oh. Is it one of _those_ things?"

"Kind of. Yeah."

"Fine." Toph straightened herself up.

"I forgive you, young man!" she said loudly, slapping Zuko's back. Hard. "Now if you'll excuse me, I've got guests to ignore and friends to wait for. If you'd kindly turn me towards the doors."

Zuko turned her so that she was facing the entrance. She began walking towards it, swinging her walking stick haphazardly. Everyone knew by then to jump out of the way.

* * *

"Sweetness! You're here!" Toph exclaimed. "It's about damn time, too. I was standing here for ten minutes now, dealing with guests I don't know. I _love_ your dress!"

"Really? Thanks, I thought it was a bit too formal- Oh. Right. Hahaha, Toph, you're hilarious."

"Of course. I'm the master of wit. Now come on! Suki's here already, I just introduced her to my friends Aang and Zuko. It was kind of annoying how everyone already knew each other, and I was just the new kid that stepped into the circle-"

"Aang's here? How do you know him? I used to tutor him!"

Aang heard Toph roar his name and decided that his name sounded much nicer when she wasn't screaming bloody murder.

* * *

"Enough talking to Twinkles and Suki, I've got someone to introduce you to. Big sis Sugar Queen, meet Big bro Sparky." Toph announced, pulling Katara towards the figure by the table. He turned around, and their eyes widened.

"You!" Katara screamed, pointing.

"You!" Zuko growled, his grip crushing an innocent Dixie cup full of punch.

"You're that- that complete JERK from the mall!"

"You're that annoying kid from the elevator!"

Toph was momentarily shocked at the exchange, but her surprise was soon replaced by a very wicked looking grin.

"You two are acquainted with each other, I see." she said sweetly, but the two people in front of her were too busy glaring at each other to notice.

For a brief moment, Toph wished she wasn't blind, if only for a moment, so that she could see the expressions on their faces.

"_This_ is Zuko?" she exclaimed indignantly.

"_This_ is Katara?" he yelled angrily.

Toph smiled in a way that reminded both of them of the Grinch.

"It appears that there was a major error in communication. So, Katara, you were in an elevator with Zuko, eh?"

"Yes, and he was a total dick to me."

"Only because you were being an irritating bitch." he retorted.

"I didn't do anything to you!"

"You were staring at my scar like you wanted to run away or something."

"I'll admit to staring, but it wasn't in disgust!"

"Sparky," Toph cut in. "What's my birthday present?"

Zuko momentarily stopped glaring and turned to the blind girl.

"What? You told me that if I brought a gift you'd kick my ass out the front door. Along with other threats."

"Yeah. No gifts. But I do want a present!"

"I'm not following."

"You have to do me three favors."

"Isn't that _her_ present?" he asked, turning back to Katara angrily. "I still can't believe that _you_ of all people... Why in hell she calls you 'Sweetness' is beyond-"

"Well, Zuko?" Toph asked. Nicely (which is Toph for 'while sending mental death threats').

"Fine. Three favors."

"Good! I now have two little genies. Sweet! For my first favor from the both of you, you guys have to be civil towards each other."

"What?"

"Fine. It's not like I have to actually go near her."

"... While linking arms."

"Toph!"

"You evil son of a-"

Toph grinned and rubbed her hands together while chuckling. Oh man, she had to thank Suki for that; this hand-rubbing deal is awesome.

"Toph, I refuse. Do you have _any_ idea what this guy said to me?"

"Toph, did you listen to a single thing I told you about what happened in that elevator?"

"Toph, this falls outside of the category 'within reason.'"

"I actually agree with Snow Queen here. I'm not doing this."

* * *

"Hey, Suki?"

"Yeah, Aang?"

"Why are Katara and Zuko linking arms and looking like they want to hurt each other?"

"I'm... I'm not sure."

* * *

"Will you stop digging your nails into my arm?"

"Oh, I'm sorry, did I hurt you?"

"Not really, but it's incredibly irritating."

"My _sincere_ apologies."

"Why is it that she calls you 'Sweetness' if everytime I see you, you're trying to cause me physical pain? Can you stop before you draw blood?"

"You didn't say please. That's not very 'civil,' Zuko. Don't you remember what Toph said?"

"Oh, so you want to play that way?"

"Bring it."

* * *

Toph looked around the crowded room. Suki and Aang were having a discussion about... Lord knows what. Zuko and Katara were nowhere in sight. The room was filled with people she didn't even know- her parents' guests. This wasn't a birthday party. It was her parents' "daughter" party. After they'd toasted her, her mother and father had gone around greeting people and having light conversations here and there. The food consisted of finger sandwiches and other small, light snacks. The only drinks here were punch and tea. No ice cream. No cakes. She had a quick mental image of her climbing onto the snack bar, throwing the punch bowl into the crowd and screaming her head off that the party sucked. She snickered to herself, causing a few people to inch away from her.

* * *

"... And you don't look _half_ as ugly as you did the other day!"

"Ooh, thank you _so_ much, you _gentleman_. You look twice as presentable as you did then! Must be the elegant clothing."

He was wearing jeans and a hoodie.

"But of course. The finest material available in this hemisphere. The hoodie was handmade by Napoleon, who did crafts as a secret hobby."

"Oops! I appear to have spilled punch on it! My apologies."

"No problem at all, miss. After all, the hoodie is red, and easy to wash."

"Damn-"

"Oh dear! I too, have accidentally spilled punch on your outfit! This won't do at all. The red shows up very clearly on your _yellow_ shirt."

"You-! You!"

"Careful, miss. Wouldn't want to say anything _uncivil_."

"I swear, the moment I go home, I-" Katara gasped. "Home! I forgot!"

She began sprinting to where (she thought) Toph was, forgetting she was still linking arms with Zuko.

"Hurry up!"

"Where are you going?" he asked, not bothering to speed up.

"I remembered something!" she said, pulling at his arm.

"I don't know. I don't feel like rushing. Why don't you tell me?"

"Ugh. My brother Sokka and I knew she wouldn't like it here. So we decided to throw her a small party. Between friends. I called her parents and told her it was for school, and they said they didn't mind. Sokka's waiting now, so we need to hurry."

"Huh. That's..."

"Stupid, something a Snow Queen would do, whatever. Just hurry up so I can stop being civil."

"I was going to say that was thoughtful. But whatever floats your boat."

"Oh. Thanks. But- Just hurry up!" She suddenly stopped. "Wait! My shirt! I can't be seen like this!"

She turned towards him.

"Give me your hoodie!"

"What? No."

"Why not? This is humiliating! I can't be seen like this!"

"And it's your fault."

"Walk in front of me then! But walk fast!"

Zuko, still linking arms with Katara, pushed her in front of him.

"Stop it!"

Zuko only smirked. Katara's eyes narrowed. Then she got an idea.

"Fine. Whatever."

She began marching away, but fell.

"OW!" she grabbed her ankle, wincing in pain.

"You're so clumsy."

Hmph. Well, let's see if you can handle this.

Katara began crying. The confident expression on his face began to waver.

"Crap, th-this hurts... I think I sprained it..."

"Uh... Are you... Okay?"

"N-no... It r-really hurts..." she lowered her head and continued "sobbing," trying not to laugh.

"U-uh, I'll go get someone to help."

Crap.

"No! I-I mean, it'd be easier if you carried me."

Zuko raised an eyebrow.

"I need to tell Toph! And it just hurts so much..." More sobs.

"... Fine." He began to pick her up bridal style, but she stopped him.

"N-no! You're going to drop me!"

"I'm not going to drop you, you spazz."

"I don't believe you. Piggyback."

"... Seriously?"

"My ankle feels like it was chopped off!" Katara added a few sniffles here, to improve the effect.

"Fine." He crouched down, and she pulled herself up, adding winces of pain here and there.

_I should become an actress_, she thought to herself. Zuko stood up, and Katara wrapped her arms around him. _No escape_.

"You okay?"

"I'm better than okay. It's like nothing happened to my ankle in the first place."

Zuko paused.

"Come on, _Sparky_. Don't have all day."

"Y-you..."

"Yes?"

Zuko tried to pry her off, but Katara was stubborn. She wrapped her legs around him as well. After a few minutes of struggling (and choking Zuko), he gave up and settled for threatening her instead.

"I'm going to pour punch on you."

"Then I'll bite you."

"And if I don't care?"

"I'm chewing gum. I'm going to spit it in your hair."

"Are you always this immature?"

"Only to people who deserve it. Come on, we need to surprise Toph."

"Fine. But only if you let me come."

"What?"

"I don't believe I stuttered. I said, only if you let me come. To the party. I already know Sokka and Aang. I'm 'lightly acquainted' with Suki. Toph is my little sister. I think I deserve to come."

"... Fine. Now giddyup."

"You're the devil. I don't see why she calls you Sweetness."

He began walking around, trying to find Toph. He was careful to bump Katara into tables and other hard objects.

* * *

Toph sat underneath the snack bar table, hidden by the long tablecloth. She saw that Tomo kid around here, and she _really_ didn't want to have to deal with him now (she would have to find out about his family- he was a lot wealthier than she'd thought if he was able to weasel his way here). No doubt that he was trying to find some way to humiliate her. She could still remember his words on the first day of school.

(frashback)

"Hey. Hey new girl!"

She heard, but didn't say anything.

"Hellooo. I'm talking to you."

She could feel him waving his hand in her face. As if she couldn't tell.

"I thought you were blind, not deaf."

He flicked her off.

"Come on, I'm trying to be nice." he snickered, still waving his middle finger in her face.

Oh, he thinks he's _so_ fucking funny.

Well, there was only one logical thing to do in a situation like this. She stood up, took aim, and swung at his head. The CRACK! noise it made was satisfying (the sound of a homerun), and she laughed at his high pitched squeals.

"For a minute there I thought you were a tough guy."

* * *

"What are we hiding from?"

"Hey, Twinkletoes. How'd you find me?"

"Your cane- I mean- walking stick was sticking out a bit from under the table."

"Oh."

She pulled it closer to her.

"So what are we hiding from?"

"I'm not hiding!" she exclaimed indignantly.

"My bad! Then what _are_ you doing?"

"I'm... I'm _avoiding_ someone."

"Who?"

"Tomo. The guy I concussed."

"Oh. Is he bothering you?"

"No, but I know he will, eventually. Assaulting him in front of all my parents' friends will look bad."

"Oh, I see. I'll stay here with you! Umm... do you want a drink?"

"... Sure, why not."

"Okay!"

"Actually, I'm a lot thirstier than I thought. Why don't you bring the whole thing down?"

"... The entire bowl of punch?"

"Yeah. All the adults are sticking with tea, anyway."

"But it's... It's enormous."

"No one will miss it, I'm sure of it."

"Well, alright, be right back!"

Aang crawled out from under the table.

"Pssst! What are we hiding from?"

"Hi, Fangirl! We're not hiding, per se. We're avoiding Tomo, the guy I concussed."

"Oh, okay. This place is cozy!"

"How did you find us?"

"I saw Aang crawl out from under here."

"I brought the punch! Hi Suki!"

"Won't someone notice if you took the punch?"

"Nah. Like Toph said, all the adults are drinking tea."

* * *

Katara and Zuko were still searching.

"Why is this place so huge?" Katara exclaimed. "We passed that snack table three times, already."

"Relax. You're the one getting the free ride, anyway. We just need to find the table with the huge bowl of punch. They're bound to be there."

"I can't see any tables with punch."

"It's somewhere here!"

* * *

Suki and Toph sang "L'Chaim" together while Aang served them all punch.

"Thank you, waiter!" exclaimed Toph. "I'd tip you, but I have no money on me right now."

"A toast to the birthday girl!" said Suki. She and Aang held up their plastic Dixie cups and drank.

"Aww. You guys are makin' me blush." Toph said, rolling her eyes with a smile.

* * *

"I'm sure we passed this place already."

"How can you tell, Miss Navigator?"

"That huge guy. He's been eating those finger sandwiches for ten minutes, now."

"Finger sandwiches... Weren't the finger sandwiches next to the punch?"

He hurried towards the table. The fat man glared at them before waddling away.

"I think so. But there's no punch. The bowl had to be a foot and a half across, and it's not here." said Katara tiredly. This guy was _really_ warm. Did he have a fever? He doesn't look like he's sick, though...

"There's a few drops here. It has to be the punch."

"Well where could it be? They can't have put it away, we were the only ones drinking it!"

"I want to say something about it being right under our noses, but I'm afraid I'll be right."

* * *

"Yo, I'll tell you what you want, what I really really want!"

"So tell me whatcha want, what you really really want!"

"I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want!"

"So tell me what you want, what you really really want!"

"I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really really really wanna zig-a-zig ah!"

Toph and Suki stopped singing and collapsed into laughter. Suki mimed holding a mike.

"Thank you, ladies and gentleman! Let's give it up for my partner, Toph!"

Toph cupped her mouth and breathed loudly, imitating a crowd.

"And a big applause for Aang and his amazing beatboxing accompaniment!"

"Where'd you learn to do that anyway, Twinkletoes? That was pretty impressive."

He laughed and shrugged.

"Honestly, I didn't even know I could do that until now."

* * *

"... Are you sick?"

"What?"

"Are you sick. You're really, really warm. I was wondering if you had a fever."

"If I had a fever, would you get off of me?"

"No."

Zuko sighed.

"No, I don't have a fever. But I do have a raging migraine from dealing with you and-"

"... What? And what?"

"Do you hear... singing?"

"... I think so..."

* * *

"Sparky! Sweetness! You found us!" Toph exclaimed.

"Hi Kat! Zuko!"

"Heeey, Katara! Sifu Hotman!"

Katara and Zuko stared at the three teenagers under the table, huddled around an enormous half-empty bowl of punch. They wisely decided not to ask.

"Toph, do you consider this party to be a lot of fun?" asked Katara mischievously.

"The party itself or us chilling under the snack bar?"

"This party."

"Hell no! If you guys weren't here, I'd probably have tried to drown myself in the fruit punch."

"Good! Come on, let's get out of here."

"What?"

"Sokka and I are throwing a party for you at our house. Just between friends. We have ice cream, cake, ice cream cake, and enough helium balloons to send an iceberg to space. We weren't sure what you wanted, but we doubted it was finger sandwiches and tea. So we got you a little bit of everything..."

Toph didn't say anything, but hugged her tightly. Katara understood. It was a very touching moment until she knocked over the fruit punch, drenching all five of them.

"Let's go?"

"Let's."


	2. Happy Birfday, Toph

**Last time on Avatar Z:**

**Toph's Birthday, yo. **

**Now back to the story.**

**Warning- this chapter is much shorter than the previous one. Much shorter.**

"... Haaappy biiiirthday to youuuu!" everyone sang (off key).

Toph grinned excitedly and blew out the candles- she missed two, but Zuko quickly snuffed them out before she noticed.

"Didja make a wish, Toph?" asked Suki excitedly.

"Of course! Anyone with half a brain would know to make a wish when blowing the candles out on a cake."

"What did you wish for?"

_I wish today lasts forever._

"Wouldn't _you_ like to know, Twinkletoes? Nope; Anyone with half a brain also knows that if you tell a bunch of people about your wish, it's not gonna come true. And my epic wish is too valuable to become redundant just 'cuz I couldn't shut my mouth. Now come on! Let's have some cake!"

She raised the cake knife dangerously high into the air; Katara, seeing the wicked expression on Toph's face, grabbed it and cut the cake for her.

"As Birthday Girl, I claim the largest piece of cake!"

"No fair, Katara, you made Aang's piece bigger than mine!"

"Oh stop it, Sokka, your piece is enormous."

"Suki, do not get in the way between a man and his insecurities about the size of his slice of cake."

"Toph, was that supposed to be a crack about my dick, or something?"

"Sokka, not while we're eating."

* * *

"Hey, you."

Katara turned around.

"I have a name, _Zuko._"

"Sorry, '_Sweetness_.' I was wondering if that was your cake."

"This piece? Yeah, it is."

"Alright."

Zuko swiped off a large chunk of chocolate frosting from her cake and began to walk away, licking it off his finger.

"Hey!" Katara yelled angrily. She ran up and tried to take some of his cake's frosting. He held it out of reach.

"You're gonna have to try harder than that, Snow Queen."

... Why does she even bother.

Katara growled and stomped away, formulating plans for revenge involving sharks and a suit made out of meat.

* * *

"Helium balloons! I've always wanted to try this out!" Toph screamed, sounding like a child in a candy store. She snatched one, bit off a small part of the knot, and began to inhale it.

"Toph, I don't think that's very healthy..." began Aang, but she ignored him, continuing to suck in the helium.

Finally she looked up and smiled.

"_Hey guys! This has to be the bestest most scrumptious birthday party ever and I love each and every one of you and the world is so pretty and perfect and wonderful_!" she exclaimed. She sounded like a baby chipmunk. On helium.

Sokka and Aang burst out laughing and began grabbing their own balloons.

"_Hasta la vista, __**baby**._" squeaked Aang, pointing at Toph.

"_I thought you said that was unhealthy, Twinkletoes_!"

"_I change my mind! If it's fun, it's okay_!"

"_That's not a very good way _to- oh darn, it stopped." Toph began to inhale more helium.

"_Ah'll be bah-ck_." squeaked Sokka, flexing his muscles.

"Move over, macho man, I wanna try." said Suki, grabbing his balloon.

"_Is it working? Oh my God! This is awesome_!" she exclaimed, laughing at the sound of her voice. "_Katara! Katara! You have to try this_!"

"Hahaha! Let me try!" Katara grabbed a balloon.

"_Sparky! Get over here and squirrel-ify yourself_!"

"Thanks, Champ, but I think I'll pass this one."

"_Don't be like that, man! It's awesome! I mean, just listen to this voice_."

"It's more succulent than the cake, Toph, I assure you. I think you should stop."

"_Why_?" asked Katara, her voice falling just short of the highest key in a piano.

"Everyone knows that inhaling helium makes you hyper as hell."

"_Come on, Zuko_!" squeaked Sokka, who tried (and failed) to look serious. "_That's just an urban legend_."

* * *

"CAAAAKE FIIIIGHT!" roared Toph later, when the supply of helium balloons had been used up. She jumped onto her chair, swiped off frosting from her plate, and smeared it on the face of the closest bystander- Aang. He stood there shocked for a moment before smiling.

"You made a big mistake, Toph. My grandpa Gyatso taught me everything there is to know about cake fights. _Everything_."

"I'll consider this a battle, then."

She hopped off her chair and fled to Katara's living room, Aang hot on her heels. Suki stared at Sokka. Sokka stared at Suki. Suki grinned. She held up her plate and swiped some frosting onto her fingers. Sokka realized that he'd thrown out his plate a while ago.

"Oh no. No. No, no, no, no, no. You wouldn't dare." he challenged, backing away.

Suki chased him into the living room. Katara and Zuko could hear Sokka screaming-

"No! Not the face! That's the money- Nooooo!"

Zuko looked at Katara.

"At least we're mature enough not to participate in games like this. Right?"

Katara smiled in a way that would make Toph proud. She grabbed her plate, covered in frosting. Instead of using her fingers, though, she simply smeared the entire thing all over Zuko's hoodie.

"_That's_ for ruining my favorite shirt!" she cried.

"What the fuck!" he exclaimed angrily. "That's never going to wash off!"

"That's your problem. Don't even think about coming near me! A stain for a stain. We're even."

"You spilled punch on me first!"

"It didn't even show up! If anything, I helped it smell nice and fruity."

He glared at her but turned away, grumbling. Katara broke out into a victory dance... in her head, of course, but was distracted when Zuko pulled the ruined hoodie over his head. His shirt underneath was pulled up with it, revealing a good part of his abs. His very, very, _very _toned abs. Katara's face flushed and she began to hyperventilate. Luckily the trance was broken when the hoodie was pulled off and his black t-shirt settled, covering his stomach again.

The feeling in her feet returned when Zuko picked up his plate and began walking towards her. She sprinted to the living room where the others were. Zuko ran after her.

* * *

"Toph! Toooph! Your brother is going to kill me!" screamed Katara, running behind the smaller girl (who looked like she'd gone rolling around in frosting).

"No I'm not! I'm just going to help her shirt smell nice and chocolatey!"

"Not now, you guys! I'm battling Aang!"

He looked like he'd dived into a cake.

"Hahaha! That's it, Zuko! Corner her!" Aang exclaimed, jumping onto the sofa and towards Toph. His entire hand was covered in chocolate frosting. He rubbed it into her hair.

(Meanwhile, Katara ran under the table while Zuko walked around the area looking for her, growling curses under his breath)

"Damn it!" Toph screamed, and reached her chocolate-covered hand towards _his_ hair.

Or at least, that was the plan. What she was holding was definitely not hair.

"Gah! That's my favorite hat!"

"You wear _beanies_?"

"It's not a beanie!"

"I'm pretty sure it is!"

"That makes me feel like a kid!"

"Fine. It's a hat, then." Toph tried to yank it off.

"No!" Aang cried, gripping his "hat" in an attempt to keep it on.

"Come on! You ruined my hair, so it's my turn!"

"No! Please, don't take my hat!"

"Come on, Twinkletoes!" she began to yank it with both hands. "What are you trying to hide?"

"I'm not trying to hide anything!"

"You're lying! Are you bald or something? Do you have crappy hair?" she stopped tugging and stared at him.

He used the opportunity to smear chocolate on her nose and escape.

"Ha! Another two points to the Avatar!" he cheered, running away from a snarling Toph. He tripped over something and fell on his face with an "Oof!" He turned around to see what he'd tripped over. His eyes widened; A blushing Sokka was lying on top of an equally red Suki. Both of their mouths were dark, as though they'd smeared frosting on them.

"Please don't tell Katara." they said simultaneously.

"Uhh," was all Aang could manage before he saw Toph take a flying leap over the sofa. He rolled out of the way before she could crush him.

"Just admit that I have more points than you!" yelled Aang behind him as he ran circles around the living room.

"No! No one defeats the Blind Bandit!"

"There you are!" said Zuko angrily, looking under the table. Katara was prepared, though; she pulled out the bottle of water she'd grabbed earlier and splashed it over Zuko's face.

"Water? This is WAR." he sputtered, moving his hair away from his eyes.

She somersaulted away from under the table and ran away laughing, preparing for part two of the plan she'd concocted from her hiding place.

Sokka and Suki decided that continuing to make out was a bad idea for the moment (the mood was killed by a roaring Toph and Zuko, the latter of which was feeling decidedly more homicidal than the former).

"I'll help you, Katara! Now run, while I distract him!" exclaimed Suki, rushing towards Zuko with her hand covered in chocolate. Katara grinned and ran off.

"How dare you!" he said. "And I thought we shared a connection ever since Mrs. Franklin's science class."

He narrowly dodged her thumb. She was quick.

"Sorry, but my friends come _before_ Powerpoint presentations on gene therapy."

Zuko spotted an opening and smirked.

"Fool! _Nothing_ comes before Powerpoint presentations on gene therapy!"

Zuko smeared frosting on Suki's neck with one quick movement; she let out an overdramatic scream and collapsed on the sofa, hand on her forehead. Zuko looked around. Toph and Aang were circling each other around the kitchen table. Sokka was rushing towards Suki. No Sugar Queens. _Damn,_ she was hiding again.

"Suki! Suki! Speak to me!" exclaimed Sokka, kneeling before her and trying not to laugh.

"S-Sokka... A-avenge me!" Suki rasped. She took one long, shuddering breath. She closed her eyes and stuck out her tongue with a small "bleh." _Man, I should become an actress_.

"Nnnoooooo!" Sokka cried, throwing his hands into the air. "Zuko! You traitor! I'll never rest until you've died a chocolatey death at my hands!"

He grabbed Suki's plate and swiped off frosting onto his hand with gusto. Zuko swore under his breath. Unbeknownst to him, Katara observed the scene from the kitchen, giggling softly.

* * *

"Where are you, Twinkletoes?" Toph sang out, deceptively sweet.

Aang didn't flinch from his position in the cabinets.

"Hey, Sweetness, have you seen Twinkletoes?"

"Yeah, I think he was hiding under the sofa."

He heard rapid footsteps fade away and winced as the cabinet door opened, letting in light.

"Thanks, Katara! How did you find me?"

"Toph must have gotten your feet. You left chocolate footsteps on your way here."

"Oh. Whoops! Dang it, looks like she got two points. Three more and she'll be beating me!"

"Speaking of which, Aang, can you do me a favor? Zuko's trying to get me, and I'm going to need your help."

"Sure! What do you need me to do?"

* * *

Sokka and Zuko, meanwhile, were having a battle of epic proportions. It took every ounce of speed and power they had to dodge each others' frosted fingers and counterattack. It also took quite a bit of cunning to think of more witty and overdramatic dialogue to scream out at each other (it slowly grew more and more dramatic until Zuko became a prince and Sokka became a rebellious peasant). However, Zuko was winning the fight, and soon he was standing on the coffee table in the living room, his thumb positioned at Sokka's forehead.

"Any last word before your defeat, peasant?" he said loudly and dramatically.

"I regret nothing, you warmongering fiend!" retorted Sokka, just as loud as Zuko.

Suki was in hysterics on the sofa. Even Toph had forgotten her fight with Aang and was grinning at the odd scene.

"Very well, then! You will be a fit example to all the other foolish rebels."

Zuko raised his frosting covered thumb and was about to bring it down upon Sokka's face when suddenly-

"Wait!"

Everyone stopped and turned; Katara was standing defiantly in the doorway of the living room.

"Don't frost him! It's me you wanted, right?"

"Well, well, well! If it isn't the little water peasant. I suppose you're here to beg for your brother's life?"

"No, Katara! Don't do it! Run away! You have your whole life ahead of you!"

"Actually, _Prince Zuko_, I'm here to make a deal with you. Let go of my brother, and I may spare you!"

"Ha! You think your empty threats scare me? What's the worst you can do?"

As if on cue, Aang ran out into view from behind Katara, wielding the hoodie Zuko had taken off earlier.

"I got what you asked me for!" said Aang, tossing it to her.

She grabbed it and held out her other hand- covered in chocolate- menacingly in front of it.

"One false move, Prince Zuko, and the hoodie gets it."

"Huh? Why are you calling him a prince-"

"Not now, Aang. This is some serious business."

Zuko scowled (trying hard not to smile).

"You drive a hard bargain, water peasant. But even with my hoodie ruined, I can easily defeat you."

"Wha-? Why'd you call her a-"

"Oh yeah? Well... I use my blood powers to restart Suki's heart!"

"What? You don't have blood powers!" exclaimed Zuko indignantly.

"Uh huh. It's... It's called bloodbending! Yeah! I use my bloodbending to restart Suki's heart!"

Suki stood up quickly, looking surprised.

"I'm alive!" she exclaimed and quickly went to Katara's side. "And I choose to defy Lord Zuko!"

"It's _Prince_ Zuko." corrected Toph.

"Whoops, sorry, I forgot."

"No, no, I like it. Zuko, Lord of fire. Fire Lord Zuko. It has a nice ring to it." he said thoughtfully. He quickly remembered his part and pointed dramatically at Aang.

"And Avatar! Are you on the rebelling side as well?"

"Why are you calling me by my cross country nickname? And what's going on here?"

"... I'll take that as a yes!" Zuko gestured towards Toph. "My partner Toph can easily take you on!"

"Your wish is my command!" Toph began running towards Aang with her hands outstretched. Aang screamed and began fleeing.

"I order you to attack the Kyoshi warrior, peasant!" Zuko said to Sokka, who was still kneeling.

"Never!"

"I'll make you a Duke in my kingdom."

"Alright, deal! Sorry Suki!" Sokka chased her around the living room while Suki yelled threats of divorce.

* * *

"You forget, Lord Zuko, that I still hold captive your hoodie!" Katara said confidently.

Zuko smiled eerily and began walking towards her. Katara tried hard not to think about his abs.

"One more step, and this is gonna be more brown than red!"

He continued walking.

"Maybe I don't care."

"... You're bluffing."

"Am I? It's already ruined. What's a few more stains going to do?"

He grabbed the piece of clothing from her hand and tossed it aside.

"No hostages. No stupid hiding places. One on one frosting battle."

Katara gulped, but remembered that she was faster now. She wasn't going to let him dodge her hits this time. Her nervousness was replaced by a calm sort of self-confidence, and she smiled back at him.

"You're on."

* * *

"Is that a boomerang?" Suki asked, watching Sokka handle the blue object in his hands. They'd given up smearing frosting over each other (honestly, they'd mostly ended up licking it off each other). Now they sat on the kitchen table, watching Katara and Zuko duke it out.

"Yup. Bought it when I was a kid. It really works, too."

"Wow, really? If you throw it, it'll come back to you?"

"Not exactly; you have to throw it a certain way. It'll make an arc, and return to the point where you threw it."

"Teach me how!"

"I can't do it inside. Trust me. I tried. I broke 'Tara's alarm clock."

"Darn. Well, can I throw it anyway?"

"Sure, as long as you don't break anything. Be careful- it goes a lot faster than most people expect, so don't throw it too hard."

"Oof, this thing is heavier than it looks..."

Suki raised the boomerang above her head and threw it into the general direction of the living room with a grunt. She and her boyfriend watched it fly- over the sofa, the coffee table, narrowly missing the flowerpot, and whack Zuko upside the head. He let out a cry in surprise and spun around, trying to find the culprit. Katara took advantage of his momentary distraction and spread frosting on his cheek. He snarled and leapt towards her.

"When I find out which one of you did that, there _will be hell to pay_!"

"... Wanna go see what Toph and Aang are doing?"

"That's a good idea."

* * *

Toph and Aang were in the hallway outside of Sokka and Katara's rooms. Toph was sitting cross-legged on top of Aang, who was on his stomach.

"Hey Fangirl. Snoozles."

"Why do _I_ get the lame nickname?"

"You're the only one I know who could fall asleep during P.E."

Suki giggled while Sokka blushed.

"Yeah, well... Okay, I can't argue that. Why are you on Aang?"

"He refuses to accept my authority."

"I refuse to accept your authority!" said Aang, his voice muffled. Toph smacked him.

"I am the clear winner of the frosting battle!"

"That last point was a fluke!"

Toph smacked him again.

"There are no flukes in a frosting battle." she said, crossing her arms. She faced Sokka.

"Where's Sparky and Sweetness?"

"They're having a frosting fight that's slowly degenerating into a regular one. Suki here may have thrown a boomerang at Zuko."

"There is no evidence of that, of course." Suki said, quickly shoving the boomerang into Sokka's hand.

Aang took advantage of Toph's laughter to squirm out from underneath her.

"I'm free!" he exclaimed, throwing his hands into the air.

He rammed into Sokka and fell over- Toph walked over and poked him with her toe.

"Get up, Twinkles. I'm tired after all that sugar and helium. We need to go break up Katara and Zuko's fight."

"Do we have to?" asked Suki. "We might as well run in front of a train in an attempt to stop it."

"Oh, come on. It's just fun and games, right? It's not like they're _actually_ trying to kill each other!" said Aang with a smile.

* * *

"Argh, I'll kill you!" screamed Katara angrily as she looked down and saw the latest stain on her shirt.

"Not if I kill you first." said Zuko with a growl, his eyes narrowing at the brown streaks on his shirt.

Before they could continue assaulting each other, Aang jumped over the sofa of the living room and landed in between them. He pushed each other apart, his hands on their shoulders.

"Geez, when Toph said you guys were trying to tear each others' throats out, she wasn't kidding."

"I never do!" she exclaimed from the other room.

"Move over, Aang. He ruined my favorite shirt."

"Stop playing peacemaker and let me continue ruining her favorite shirt."

"What's wrong with playing peacemaker?" asked Aang with a small pout. "I _like_ playing peacemaker. I'm pretty good at it."

"Just move!" exclaimed Zuko, not taking his eyes off of Katara.

"No! Come on, it's Toph's birthday party. Not a fight to the death." Aang said, looking them both in the eye. Katara and Zuko both had the decency to look a bit ashamed. "Now come on! We were so distracted by our negativity that we forgot to acknowledge the positive aspect that we came for."

Everyone stared at him.

"You sound like my uncle, Aang." said Zuko with a small frown.

"That's nothing." said Toph. "You sound like a non-senile version of Old Man Bumi. He lives across the street from me."

"My Grandpa Gyatso says stuff like that all the time." he said with a grin. "Now come on! It's late. We should start cleaning up."

Everyone looked around the room and realized the mess; furniture was knocked over, empty balloons littered the floor, and everything- _everything_- had streaks of chocolate frosting. Everyone was covered in frosting and (with the exception of Sokka) the remains of the punch Toph had spilled in the previous chapter.

"... How are we going to clean this?" exclaimed Katara, who'd been so distracted that the horror of the place had gone unnoticed until then.

"I feel sticky." said Toph simply.

* * *

Fact: The house was eventually cleaned, with the power of teamwork (and Katara's old waterguns).

Fact: Everyone managed to clean themselves up and go home (way past curfew).

Fact: Before leaving Sokka and Katara's apartment, however, they spent some time talking and giving gifts to Toph.

Fact: Toph yelled angrily when she found out they'd given her gifts, and turned away for a while, rubbing her eyes furiously. After a while, though, she admitted that she was touched and really, really happy. Her friends understood.

Facts:

Sokka gave her an mp3 player ("Thanks, Snoozles! What kind of music do you like?").

Suki grinned and rubbed her hands together and promised to give her the present the next day ("Fangirl, I swear, if you do anything _weird_...").

Despite owing her favors, Katara had baked her a box of cream puffs ("YES! Back off, heathens. I'm eating this all on my own!").

Likewise, Zuko gave her a gift card for her favorite buffet, and what looked suspiciously similar to iron knuckles ("It's a ring. I swear." "Thanks, Sparky! Can't wait to use it!").

Aang wasn't sure at all what to give her, so he had bought her two bracelets, a pair of shades, fingerless gloves and a pack of gum ("... Do you always try to go bankrupt whenever a friend's birthday comes up? Don't look at me like that, I was kidding. All this stuff is great! Thanks, Twinkletoes.").

Fact: They had a lot of fun ("We should all do this again sometime! Suki, stop rubbing your hands like that, I'm getting scared.")


	3. Don't Try This at Home

**Note: Songs belong to respective artists. Song choices do not reflect the kind of music I listen to, nor do they reflect the kind of music I think these characters listen to. Not going to be a songfic, so very few song lyrics- only enough to set the mood. Now let's begin.**

Day 41:

"Hi, Toph!"

"Hi, Twinkletoes."

"Hey, you're wearing the stuff I got you for your birthday!"

"Yup. I mean, if you're going to spend every cent you have on buying me gifts, it'd be pretty rude of me not to use them."

"Aww, don't be like that! It wasn't that bad, anyway. Money's not that big of a problem for me."

"Hey, Twinkles?"

"Yeah?"

Toph stepped closer to him. Aang turned red and took a step back. Toph walked closer- Aang bumped into a wall.

"U-uh... T-toph?"

Toph stopped, stared, and snatched his hat off.

"Gah!"

"Ahahahaha! I've got you now! Let's see what your big secret is!"

She quickly placed her hand on his head; her mouth dropped open.

"No. Way."

"... Please don't tell anyone."

"This- I can't even- You- Just... Woah."

"Please please _please_ don't tell anyone."

"Why? I've been asking around, you know. No one knows whether or not you even _have_ hair. This is the greatest discovery since fire!"

"That's because I like to keep certain things to myself now _please_ give me my hat back _before somebody comes and sees_-"

Toph tossed the hat to Aang, who quickly shoved it back on his head.

"I'm surprised, Twinkletoes! All this time, I thought you-"

The bell rang. Toph smiled and whacked Aang's leg with her walking stick.

"I'm surprised, Twinkletoes. Next thing you know, you'll be telling me that you have tattoos or something. That would _really_ be something."

She chuckled at the thought of _Twinkletoes_ having tattoos and walked off; Aang looked at the blue arrows on his hands and decided to keep his mouth shut.

* * *

"Hey! Hey, Zuko!"

"Uh, hi Suki."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing. It's just... I didn't expect you to talk to me."

"Why not?"

"We normally don't. Talk to each other, I mean."

"Don't be ridiculous, frownypants, you can't be fake-killed by someone and have your fake-spouse attempt to fake-avenge you without becoming friends with your fake-killer."

"... I'm sorry, I could only understand about nine percent of-"

"SO Zuko, I was wondering if you were free today. It's part of my gift to Toph; I invited everyone from yesterday, already."

"Umm... Depends. I work at my uncle's place on Wednesdays, and-"

"Oh come on! It'll be fun! Just call your uncle and say that you have important business to take care of."

"... Sure. Why not."

"Great! I'll text you afterschool, okay?"

"What are we going to do?"

"Heeheehee! It's karaoke night at the Jasmine Dragon!"

"Oh, okay, I th- _did you just say the Jasmine Dragon._"

But Suki was gone.

* * *

"I call shotgun!" Toph announced, jumping over the door of Suki's convertible rather than opening it.

"I call shotgun for the ride back!" said Katara, lying down on the back seats. Suki got into the car and started the engine.

"So where are we going?" asked Katara, sitting up.

"The _mysterious beyond_!" sang Suki. She was feeling awfully giddy, excited to surprise Toph.

"Did you just reference Land Before Time?" asked Toph incredulously.

"Of course. It was my favorite cartoon as a kid. How do _you_ know about it?"

"My neighbor, Kuei. Our parents used to force us to have little playdates. He was obsessed with Land Before Time."

"What the heck is Land Before Time?" asked Katara.

"It's what happens when drunk archeologists hang out with drunk animators." said Toph.

"Don't be dissing my favorite cartoon!"

"It's not a dissing! It's a true statement."

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"Katara can decide for us." said Suki. She looked at the rearview mirror at Katara. "Well?"

She held her hands up in defense.

"Don't look at me! I've never seen it! Besides; Blues Clues was the best children's cartoon there was."

"She's right." said Toph. "I remember that guy kept asking me where the clue was, and I'd scream, '_how the hell am I supposed to know?_' Blues Clues made me who I am today."

"Toph, you _would_ do that as a kid."

"Who said anything about this happening when I was a kid?"

* * *

"Woah, nice ride, Zuko!" exclaimed Sokka. Aang just grinned and hopped into the front seat.

"Thanks, Sokka. Aang, please don't ruin the leather."

Aang ignored him and put his feet up.

"I'm liking this!" he said. He put his hands behind his head and let out a sigh of satisfaction. "I wish Grandpa let me have a car."

"Why doesn't he?" asked Sokka, who was fiddling with the radio.

"Put your seatbelts on, you two." said Zuko exasperatedly, putting the car into drive.

"He's really spiritual. He doesn't believe in having too many material goods." said Aang with a smile. "Also, he thinks I'd crash it pretty quickly. He calls it a 'fool's investment.'"

"Sokka, stop messing with the radio."

"Geez, what's with you? You're grumpier than usual."

"I'm not _grumpy_, I'm _livid._"

"What's your malfunction?"

"I don't _have_ a malfunction. Your _girlfriend_ is making me go to the one place I was hoping I'd avoid _ever_ having to go with you people. And _Toph_ is making use of the favors I owe her. I have every reason to be _pissed off_."

"Alright, alright, you jerk. No need to talk in italics. What favor do you owe Toph?"

"Let's just say the only reason I'm not driving off a cliff is because the car is expensive." said Zuko, gritting his teeth. "Oh, and you guys are in the car with me." he added as an afterthought.

Aang observed Zuko's death grip on the wheel (his knuckles were turning white) and wished he'd sat in the back with Sokka.

"_Where the fuck did you learn to drive?_" yelled Zuko out of the window at a car in the lane next to them.

"Zuko, you were the one who sped and cut them off." Sokka pointed out meekly.

"Shut up, Sokka."

"Zuko, please don't let your fury lead to us getting in jail." said Aang, gripping the seatbelt tightly.

"Forget keeping us out of jail, if you keep speeding like this, we're going to be part of some huge, high-speed pursuit involving nine police cars and a S.W.A.T. helicopter."

The older boy ignored them both and pounded on the wheel, honking at a very offended looking pedestrian.

"Hurry up!" he yelled.

"Zuko, it's a red light. They're _supposed_ to cross now."

"Shut up, Aang."

* * *

"Hello, Mr. Iroh!" exclaimed Suki, hugging an old man with a rather pronounced belly. "You guys, this is Mr. Iroh. He owns the Jasmine Dragon! I met him when my mom sold him some of her specialty tea."

"Ahh, yes. I remember it well! It was masterfully blended; it was a joy to drink." said Mr. Iroh, looking nostalgic. He had a low and soothing voice. Toph decided she liked him.

"Hello, Mr. Iroh." said Katara respectfully, holding out her hand for him to shake. She was surprised when he hugged her instead.

"No need for formalities, here! You must be Miss Katara. Miss Suki has told me much about you."

He turned to Toph and was about to speak, but she cut him off.

"'Sup, pops? Name's Toph."

She smiled and held up her fist. Iroh was momentarily surprised, but he grinned as he pounded fists for the first time.

"It is good to meet you, Miss Toph. I have heard quite a bit about you as well. That was fist-pounding, was it not? I can see why so many kids do it, I must admit it was quite different."

"Oh, just call me Toph. No 'Miss' is necessary. This place is nice!" she said approvingly, walking around a bit. She could feel only a few other people around.

"So it is true, then? You can 'see' without your eyes... You are quite blessed."

"... Thank you. I can't say I've ever looked at it like a blessing, before. It's... It's pretty cool." Toph smiled at the old man. "You know? You're alright, Mr. Iroh."

She held up a fist again.

"Call me 'Pops.' I find it endearing." said Iroh, pounding fists more confidently than before.

"Well, I told him that it was your birthday, so he said he'd give us a surprise." said Suki, grinning at Toph.

"And I have. Normally it's about five dollars for every song you wish to sing on the karaoke machine I bought on eBay, but for you and your friends, it is free, along with food and drink. Everything is on the house." said Iroh with a warm smile. "Only for today, of course. An old man must make his living somehow." he added, seriously.

Suki slapped her forehead. While Katara and Toph laughed.

"Thanks, guys." said Toph, hugging Suki and Iroh (briefly). "This is an awesome post-birthday present."

* * *

"Suki just texted me. She's wondering where we are." said Sokka from his seat in the back.

"That's weird. We left the house twenty minutes ago. It's a ten minute drive." said Aang, looking at the directions Katara had sent him earlier today. "Do you know where we're going, Zuko?"

"Perfectly." he said grimly.

"You sure? You took three right turns. Four, now. We passed that store already."

"Yeah, Zuko. You sure you're not just... putting off the inevitable? I mean, I know Toph's favor is supposedly really crazy, but you have to confront your problems eventually."

"I don't know what you're talking about." said the (still angry) driver.

"Yeah you do!" exclaimed Aang, pointing in front of him. "See? You just made a U-turn for the second time in a row! In the same street!"

"Zuko, if you don't drive us to the Jasmine Dragon right now, I'm calling Toph."

* * *

Fact: Zuko was, in fact, trying to stall.

Fact: Zuko did start driving towards the Jasmine Dragon, but his temper still remained.

Fact: Sokka and Aang no longer fear death, having had so many near-experiences that it became almost commonplace during the drive.

* * *

"It's been twenty minutes. Sokka said there was traffic problems or something, so we might as well get started." said Suki, sounding a bit put off. She sipped a bit of tea. Damn, that was some pretty good tea. Didn't even taste like tea!

"Don't worry, Fangirl." said Toph. "Your boyfriend will be here soon."

Suki blushed and hit Toph lightly, smiling.

"Shush."

"Argh, it's so _weird_ knowing that my best friend and my brother are making out behind my back..." said Katara with a shudder. She drank some of that delicious tea to calm her nerves.

"We do _not_ make out behind your back!" Suki said, putting her nose in the air. "We make out whenever we wish. It just so happens that you always happen to be looking the other way when we choose to do so."

"I almost regret calling you lawyergirl," said Toph with a grin. She put the cup of tea to her lips and almost choked. "Holy shit! This is amazing! It's like... liquified delicious!"

"It's pure ambrosia." said Katara, trying not to smile.

"If gold had a flavor, this is what it'd taste like." Suki countered.

"You girls flatter me." said Iroh with a chuckle. "But, I will admit, I often think of myself as one of the best tea-brewers in town."

"You _are_!" said Toph, quickly chugging the rest of her cup down. "I love this, and I don't even _like_ tea!"

Suki winced and Iroh gasped, clutching his chest.

"Not like tea? You wound me!" exclaimed Iroh. "It is my solemn belief that tea is the greatest thing since fire was discovered."

The four of them laughed, completely oblivious to the stares of the other customers.

"Ooh, Fangirl, I dare you to go up there and sing!" said Toph, jabbing her finger into Suki's arm.

"Ouch! Ow! Alright, alright!" she said, rubbing her (surely bruised) arm. "But only if you go up afterwards."

"Why Suki!" Toph said loudly, trying to look as offended as possible. "I'm blind! However will I read the words? Your suggestion is extraordinarily crass, I'll have you know."

"Oh shut up, Toph. You listen to more music than anyone in this building combined. And you never let your being blind ever stop you, have you?"

Toph put on a pout and crossed her arms. Suki climbed on the small stage and looked through the list of songs in the corner. She chose the first one she recognized and walked to the center of the stage, smiling nervously and gripping the mike a bit too tightly. The music started up, and she focusing only on her friends, trying to forget the rest of the people.

_Nice time to forget your stage fright, Suki._

She looked at the screen at the back of the teashop and took a deep, shaky breath before she began to sing.

"_We are the crowd, we're co-comin' out,_

_Got my flash on, it's true, need that picture of you..."_

Her voice was shaky at first, and she stood there stiffly, nervous as anyone could get.

Katara and Toph cheered excitedly in support.

("Lady Gaga? Seriously?" muttered Toph to Katara, still smiling at Suki. "Gaga's crazy."

"She's... artistic. Some call her a genius."

"Yeah, I know. Didn't pin Fangirl down as a Gaga fan, to be honest."

"Neither did I.")

As the song continued, Suki began to forget her initial stage fright and began singing louder and louder. Soon, she was strutting around the stage, and the entire shop was cheering for her.

"I didn't know Fangirl could sing!" yelled Toph over the music.

"Neither did I!"

A conveniently placed instrumental allowed Suki to stop singing for a while and dance instead- she moved her feet to the rhythm and threw her arms in the air, swaying her hips to the beat of the music. The teashop erupted into cheers, mostly by guys.

"I love you Suki!" screamed Katara, waving her hands in the air.

"Suki, I want you inside me!" screamed Toph (even louder).

It was then that Sokka, Aang and Zuko walked in. Aang immediately whooped when he saw Suki on stage, and ran to where his friends were seated. Zuko and Sokka stayed put- Zuko seemed nervous while Sokka was gaping at his girlfriend, dumbstruck.

"_... Baby you'll be famous, chase you down until you love me, papa-paparazzi..."_

The song continued for a few more moments before ending, and the room exploded with applause. Suki blushed and bowed repeatedly, grinning.

"Suki!" exclaimed Sokka excitedly, no longer standing around in a stupor. "Suki!"

She turned towards him and turned even redder.

"Oh my God, you _saw_ that?"

She stepped down and hugged her boyfriend, who was still praising her "amazing talent."

"Stop exaggerating, Sokka, it's just a song."

"I'm not! You were great!"

"Whatever." she said with a broad smile, lightly punching his arm.

Toph heard the exchange and smiled. _Ah, young love._ _Never mind that they're older than me, of course._

* * *

Meanwhile, Zuko was torn between going to his friends and running out of the teashop screaming. His choice was made for him when Iroh spotted him.

"My nephew! How good to see you!" he greeted warmly.

"Pops is your uncle?" exclaimed Toph. "What?"

"Why didn't you ever tell me?" asked Suki indignantly (although whether she was addressing Zuko or Iroh was unclear).

The group continued to gape at him, shock written all over their faces, and Zuko decided that no, this wasn't a good day at all.

After the initial shock wore off ("How can someone so nice be related to someone so rude?" "Shut up."), the group got comfortable, sipping tea and conversing with one another. Toph noticed Suki and Sokka snuggling fairly close to one another- how sweet. She resisted the urge to roll her eyes. As much as she supported her friends, nothing would change her mind about romance. Romance was icky. And gross. It was gicky. And gicky was pretty damn disgusting. Nope, love was not for her. It was a lot of fun watching others hook up, though.

* * *

"... But my nephew, unfortunately, cannot make tea for the life of him, I'll have you know. Only hot leaf juice." Iroh concluded. Everyone tittered except for Zuko, who only scowled harder and went lower in his seat.

"That reminds me of another story! Back in my day I was quite the accomplished sailor, you know. Called me a Dragon, they did. After my retirement, I kept a small ship and crew with me, for those days when I'm feeling particularly nostalgic. Anyway, I brought my dear nephew along with me one day, and that day happened to be Music Night, which is quite a bit of fun, if not slightly... risque. We had just gotten the instruments out, oh, and forgive the digression, but my nephew is extremely talented with instruments..."

"You play an instrument?" asked Toph with surprise. "And you didn't serenade me once?"

"Instrument_**s**_. And no, I try not to play if I can avoid it." Zuko was gritting his teeth, and looked like he was two minutes away from assaulting his uncle. Katara took special pleasure in his embarrassment.

"A grave disappointment, I'm afraid. I taught him how to play my favorite instruments, from the drums to the tsuungi horn, which is rather obscure, but extremely pleasant to listen to. But back to the story! It was Music Night, and the clarinetist had brought two pipes of Susanowo rice wine, which is an _astounding_ amount of alcohol. Eventually, the wine got lost in the midst of the regular drinks, and before long my nephew had gotten himself very, _very_ drunk. This normally wouldn't have happened, of course, but Susanowo is famous for being very strong and almost completely tasteless at the same time.

It was a night I'd _never_ forget. My nephew, usually so harsh, had turned into a completely different person, although whether or not the change was for the better was quite difficult to decide. He was much more open, of course, but he was also very... violent. In the blink of an eye, he had challenged nine of the crewmembers to a spar; his victory was much more surprising as he'd fought them all at the same time. Although the rest of the crew were intoxicated as well, which may have factored into the battle's outcome. And such a mouth! I ought to have scrubbed his mouth at with soap, his language was so foul. He had offended so many people with his rather... colorful language, that I was surprised he hadn't been thrown overboard in a minute. Instead, he'd fallen off the boat himself. Luckily we were fairly close to the shore, or we would have been in serious trouble."

The group burst into raucous laughter, and almost everyone was shedding tears of mirth. Everyone except Zuko, who's eyes had narrowed dangerously. Toph noticed the violent aura he was emitting and slapped his back several times, still cracking up.

"Oh relax, Sparky! You know we all love you." she said, wiping away a tear and sighing contently, trying to fight back more giggles. "Now, did you remember the favor you owe me?"

"How could I forget. But I'm not going now."

"Why not?"

"I dunno. Maybe it's because I'm angry enough to maul a rhino with my bare hands. I'll go if others go first."

"What _is it_ with you and African mammals?"

"Still not going."

"Ugh. Fine."

Toph kicked where she thought Sokka's shin would be ("Ow!" "Sorry, Aang.").

"Hey Snoozles! Why don't you go up there and sing?"

"No way, man. Nuh uh."

"Don't be such a chicken."

"I _like_ chicken. Chickens are the bomb."

"What bird _don't_ you like?"

"Hmm... Eagles, man. I was at a zoo once, and this guy was supposed to have the eagle land on his arm. It landed on my arm instead, which was unprotected. I began bleeding uncontrollably and screaming I started flailing around, but the damn thing wouldn't let go."

"My condolences. Now don't be such an eagle and sing."

"Nah. Eagles are majestic. I think I'll not sing and stay that way."

"Fine. Twinkletoes?"

"Uh... That's alright. I'd rather eat Sokka the Eagle. And I'm a vegetarian."

"Fine. What about you, Sweetness? Do it. It's part of the favor thing."

"Toph you're such a bully. And not now. Maybe later."

"Hmph. Fine! You're lucky I'm feeling so good today, missy. Must be the tea."

Iroh snapped his fingers as he got an idea.

"Pops, did you just snap your fingers because you got a clever idea?"

"Of course! It's quite entertaining. You should try it." he said, as he got up and went to a room in the back of the shop.

Toph thought about it and decided that it sounded almost as fun as rubbing her hands together and chuckling menacingly whenever she got an evil idea.

* * *

Iroh returned later, holding several bright, lime green bottles.

"Help yourselves, my young friends." he said brightly, putting a bottle in front of each person.

"What is it?" asked Katara suspiciously, peering through the green glass.

"It's not alcoholic, if that's what you are thinking, Miss Katara. No, I'm well aware that you are all underage. Save for my nephew, of course."

"What? You're old enough to drink?" exclaimed Katara, turning towards Zuko.

"Not exactly. Turning twenty one in a few months."

"You act more like a sixteen year old."

"Oh really? And how old are you supposed to be? Fourteen at most."

"I'm eighteen and turning nineteen soon, I'll have you know!"

"Come, come! Let's not fight over such trivial matters such as age. I, myself, think that physically, I'm much more able bodied than most-"

"Please stop, Uncle." said Zuko, pinching the bridge of his nose in exasperation.

"Hey, Mr. Iroh? You still didn't tell us what this stuff was." said Sokka.

"Just something I thought would make the party a bit more entertaining. Cactus Juice! Much more tasty than it sounds, believe me. There's no alcohol or any type of drug involved..."

* * *

"... but that doesn't mean it won't completely mess you up." thought Iroh to himself, beaming while watching the kids and being very entertained. "Oh, Iroh, you old fox. You're going to burn for this."

"A giant mushroom!" exclaimed Sokka, his eyes unfocused. He lurched towards Iroh, draping his body across the table. "Maybe it's friendly!"

He hugged Iroh around the middle, mumbling something about "giant mushy friend."

"My ears feel weird." moaned Suki, she grabbed Toph's hair and began massaging it. "They feel like Toph's face..."

"Twinkletoes, get your pancreas out of my face." Toph said, addressing the cup of tea before her quite severely. "I mean it, mister! Don't look at me like that!"

Aang was sucking on a spoon. Which was being held up with his feet.

"My ankle hurts. Maybe sucking on this boat oar will help." he said, continuing to chew the spoon.

"Sokka? Sokka, where are you?" slurred Suki. She turned to Katara, still fondling Toph's hair. "Are you my mother?"

"Noooo, silly!" said Katara, giggling and staring into space. "I'm your _other_ mother! But don't worry, I don't want to eat you. Right, Zuuuuuuko?"

Zuko's head was on Katara's lap. He was poking Katara's chin repeatedly.

"Duuude. Everytime I poke your nose, your glasses become a different color." he slurred, poking Katara's chin again. "Look, see? Now it's the color of awkward silences."

"Yer weird, Zuko." drawled Sokka, pointing his finger at Katara but looking somewhere to the right of Zuko's head. "I like you! We should become penpals. Like... Brazilian penpals."

"Brazilian penpals? I dunno if I can handle the pressure." said Zuko seriously, shaking his head. Poke. Poke. Poke. Poke.

"Naw, man. We don't have to do it im-*hic*- immediately. We can start out being Venezuelan penpals. Then slowly work up to Ecuadorian penpals. I'll write a twelve step program right now." said Sokka. He grabbed a napkin and a fork, and began using the napkin to write on the fork.

"Look, Suki!" he exclaimed, shoving the fork into Toph's face. "I drew a dragonhawk! It's like a dragon and a hawk combined."

"Lemme see!" said Toph, and she sniffed the fork suspiciously. "No, it still tastes like lemons. Try again!"

She turned to Aang.

"You! You look like a gentleman and a scholar! Will you be my organ donor?"

"I'm not qualified to be European, ma'am." said Aang apologetically. He patted her ankle affectionately.

"Darnations!" exclaimed Toph, pointing her finger into the air. "Foiled again!"

"Katara!" said Aang. "Where's Zuko?"

"Zuko is- hehehehehe, his name is fun to say. Zuuuuko. Zuuuuuuuuuuuuko. ZuUuUuUu-"

"Yes?" yelled Zuko, getting up abruptly. "I was simply pinching Katara's earlobes. It makes her hair go in little hair-loopies. I like her hair-loopies."

"Hey! Wait just one darn-tootin' second!" exclaimed Toph. She climbed off of Aang's shins and stood on the booth seat. "Schveetness and Sporky have to go sing!"

"Who you callin' Schveetness?" exclaimed Katara, glaring at Iroh's beard. "I've never even _been_ to Germany!"

"I have!" exclaimed Zuko, thrusting his finger in the air. "And not one single gummy bear. I almost sued them for that! But I didn't."

"You guys... You guys have to go and *hic* sing!" said Toph, waving her hand around dangerously close to Aang's beanie/hat.

"Not until someone else shings." slurred Zuko, whose nose was being poked by Katara.

"Yeah! Not until someone else sings. How about you! You should sing! Your mike will be the mike that will pierce the heavens."

"Who the hell do you think I am?" demanded Sokka angrily. "Of course I'll sing! That's ridicilositific of you."

He flopped out of the booth and towards the stage, using a fork and knife to get him on (he had forgotten about the stairs). He played with the machine a bit before choosing a song, and he swaggered towards the mike, throwing the cutlery into the audience ("Ouch!" "Sorry, man." "I'm a woman!" "Wha'ever.")

"This song is for you, Suki. Even if you did make me wear a dress!"

The song started out slow, calming even the tipsy group in the center of the shop.

"_You're just too good to be true, can't take my eyes off of you,_

_you feel like heaven to touch, I wanna hold you so much..._"

Sokka sang. He wasn't bad either- he only stumbled over a few words in his cactus-juice induced stupor. The music sped up suddenly, and he tore the mike off its stand, jumped off the stage, and onto the table where his friends were sitting (their calmness disappeared into cheers and screams).

"_I love you baby! And if it's quite alright, oh pretty baby,_

_please warm my lonely nights, I love you baby; trust in me when I say..._"

Suki screamed and tried to jump Sokka, but was held back by Toph and Katara.

"_... And let me love you baby, let me love you..._"

The song ended, and Sokka threw the mike in the general direction of the stage ("Ow!" "Sorry, ma'am." "I'm a guy!" "Make up yer damn mind!"). Suki pounced him, and they both disappeared somewhere in the booth next to them.

"Eeeeew, are they making out and exchanging cooties? And saliva?" asked Toph.

"Actually, they're playin' thumb war." said Katara, looking over the divider.

"Now it's your turn to sing!" said Toph with a giggle.

"No! Why can't Aang go?" said Katara with a pout.

Aang was carefully examining Iroh's fingers, but looked up at the sound of his name.

"Nuh uh. No. No way Jose. I don't even know anyone named Jose." he turned to Toph. "Are _you_ Jose?"

"No, I'm blind."

"I knew it! And no, I don't wanna sing. I'll do anything _but_ sing!"

"You gotta spar me sometime then!" said Toph, trying to punch his arm but missing (she knocked over the pepper instead).

"Fine! Bring it ooooon." slurred Aang, returning to his close inspection of Iroh's left thumb. "Fascinating specimen..." he said.

"Maaan. Why can't Zuuuuuko go?" Katara said, crossing her arms.

"Yeah! Why can't Zuko go? Wait a minute... No! Zuko can't go!" said Zuko from somewhere underneath Katara, sounding muffled.

Toph looked under the table- Katara was sitting cross legged on Zuko's back. Huh. Katara's voice _had_ come from higher up than she'd expected...

"Sugar Queen, come on! Stop being such a... Smeagle. I think that's what it was. What was yer least favorite bird again, Snoozles?"

"The rhino!" exclaimed Sokka from the booth behind her.

"Me too!" said Zuko, still sounding muffled. "We truly _are_ Brazilian penpals!"

Zuko and Sokka tried to high-five each other, forgetting that they were a little over two yards away from each other (and that there was a wooden divider also separating them).

"Fine, be that way." said Katara, huffing. She scrambled off of Zuko and walked to the stage.

"Wait!" exclaimed Toph. She jumped on Aang's back and pointed towards the stage. "Yip yip!"

Aang skipped towards the stage, carrying Toph piggyback style.

"That'll be two pence, ma'am!" he said, holding out his hands.

"Two pence? You Cockney madman, you're trying to rip me off!" Toph said angrily. She clambered onto the stage towards Katara.

"You gotta sing a song that I tells you to sing!" she said, pointing at Katara's right eye.

"What? That's unfair! You're a racist!"

"No, I'm a Frenchman! Now listen closely, children. This is the song you gots to sing."

Toph whispered into Katara's shoulder.

"Got it?"

"Alright. It's not nearly as bad as I thought. But you'll still pay for this!"

"If it's anything like what that crazy British Twinkletoes charged me, _then_ I'll be sorry."

The music began- a simple piano melody- and the mike was thrown onto the stage (Katara caught it).

"_Head underwater, and you tell me to breathe easy for a while._

_But breathing gets harder, even I know that..._"

Katara was swaying (although whether it was from the music or because she was tipsy was unclear), and was clutching the microphone's stand as if to support herself.

"_I'm not gonna write you a love song, 'cuz you asked for it_

_'cuz you need one, you see, I'm not gonna write you a love song..._"

"Why the hell not?" asked Suki with a pout, climbing over the divider to the booth where she'd been sitting. Sokka followed her. Toph and Iroh cheered and grinned, while Aang threw bits of napkin-confetti into the air. Zuko looked like someone slapped him across the face. Suki stared at his expression and poked Toph. She pointed at Zuko. A slow grin spread across Toph's face.

"_... to write you- a love song- today. Today..._"

Katara held the last note a bit longer before dropping it. The music faded away with her, and was replaced by applause. She smiled broadly, the cactus juice making her bolder, and she stepped off the stage confidently.

"Ha! Now it's your turn!" she said, pointing at Zuko's nose. The odd look on his face was replaced by a small scowl.

"Fine! I see how it is! You arrogant pilots think you're all that..." he said, stomping towards the stage, not noticing that Toph was latched onto his back. "Marines are just as cool, you know!" he yelled at Katara.

"Go eat corn, you grain-eater!" she retorted.

"Take that back, you savage, colonizing-"

"Ahem." said Toph, climbing off of Zuko's back. "You gots to sing, 'member?"

"Oh yeah." he said, staring at the ceiling. "Fighting all those pirates made me forget."

"Damn pirates. Anyways, I get to pick the song yer gonna sing!"

"What? That's unfair!"

"I did the same to Schveetness. It's totally fair."

"Oh. I was wondering why you were on stage with her..."

"Come closer! You're too tall. You probably headbutted the sun before."

"I've done it before. It hurt a lot, it did."

Toph whispered into the top of Zuko's head (he'd sat down cross-legged on the floor).

"Whaaaaa? No!" he said, dismayed.

"Why not?"

"I had another song in mind. I mean, it's a good song, but I don't like it. Not loud enough. Not enough guillotine- _guitar_. Guitar. Not guillotine. Guillotine is a country."

"It is. It's off the coast of West Korea."

"Huh. I woulda guessed it was off the coast of Siberia-"

"Stop distracting me, Sporky! You have to sing it. Or else!"

"Fine, Chump. I mean Champ. Chump is a type of fish."

"It is. It's a distant relative of the tiger shark."

"Huh. I woulda guessed salmon-"

"_Hurry up!_"

Zuko slowly got up with a groan, and walked to the machine, roughly punching in the song. The song started out slow as he began to sing-

"_I took a walk around the world to ease my troubled mind,_

_I left my body lyin' somewhere in the sands of time. I watched _

_the world from through the dark side of the moon. I feel there's nothing I can do..._"

"Take it off!" yelled Toph to Zuko as he sang, waving her hands in the air.

"No!" exclaimed Aang, clutching his bean-_**hat**_with all his might.

"Not you, you dumb Tootsie Pop. She's talkin' to that dude on the stage." stated Sokka matter-of-factly, balancing the (empty) bottle of cactus juice on his finger.

"That's no dude!" giggled Suki, her eyes unfocused. "That's Zuko! We worked on a project together once. It wasn't about whales."

Katara just stared at the stage wide-eyed.

"_... If I'm alive and well would you be there holdin' my hand?_

_I'll keep you by my side with my superhuman might, kryptonite!_"

With that, Zuko grabbed the stand and broke out into a long, enthusiastic (and actually pretty good) air guitar solo.

"I knew you were holdin' out on me!" yelled Toph, pointing her finger at him angrily.

Sokka grabbed a fork and a salt dispenser and began drumming on the table to the music.

Iroh only grinned. "Yes, Iroh, you will indeed burn for this." he thought to himself.

* * *

"That was aweshum!" yelled Toph. She held out a fist for him to pound, but he missed.

"Yeah, well, I'm never doing it again, you tiny ostrich." said Zuko, poking Toph's forehead. "Hey Kat- *hic* -ara! Come over here. Your hair's yellow. And covered in zucchini."

Katara snapped out of her daze and shook his hand. Wait, no, that was his ear. Whatever, same thing.

"I'll admit, Snarky. You did pretty good up there." she admitted, shaking his ear.

"Thanks, blondie! You did good too." he replied, poking her chin. "Wait, yer a brunette now."

"Wait! Isn't it your turn, Toph?" asked Aang.

"I'm o'er here, Sprinkletoes."

"Oh. Right." he turned from Sokka's wrist to Toph.

"Whaddya mean my turn, you neon madman?"

"Don't diss my cabbages!" yelled Suki.

"I didn't do nothing!" yelled Zuko back.

"I was talking to Sokka!" she yelled, pointing at Katara.

"Leave my nephew alone!" yelled Sokka.

"You gotta sing!" said Aang, undeterred by the odd conversation. "Unless you're too afraid..." He smiled wickedly.

"The Blind Bandit fears nothing! Not even, like, piranhas made of lasers. Lasers and heat-seeking knives!"

"Then go sing! It's your party!"

"You know what, Twinkie-toes? I think I will!"

She marched to the stage, screaming at the top of her lungs (she had to use echolocation to see).

"You!" she demanded, pointing at a random customer who had been laughing at the group's antics for the past hour or so.

"Me?"

"Yeah! You! Come closher."

"Uhh... yeah?"

"I dunno if you noticed. But I'm deaf. I mean, blind. Blind. Yeah."

"Uhh... I noticed..."

"Good girl! Now-"

"I'm a man."

"Shaddup and lemme talk. Sheesh. I need yer help pickin' the song. So... help me pick the best bison you have."

"... Excuse me?"

"Don't toy with me, sheriff!"

* * *

Eventually they were able to choose a song and the group was cheering drunkenly before the music had even begun.

"This 'lil number goes out to my long, long, long, _long_, _**long**_ lost sister, Elizabeth Bennet. Lizzay, you're my forever girl!"

The music began- drums that sounded ten times louder with the speakers, a bass riff- and soon Toph was singing, swaying dangerously.

"_Well you must be a girl with shoes like that, she said you know me well,_

_I've seen you and little Steven and Joanna 'round the back of my hotel, oh yeah..._"

Everyone began cheering and clapping and singing along- a crudely drawn picture of a bra (with Sokka's signature on it) was thrown to Toph's feet. Katara grabbed Aang's wallet and threw about $15.43 onto the stage.

"Yeah, this is awesome." thought Toph to herself, still singing loudly (she knew this song by heart). "I'm so gonna regret this later."

"Screw Lizzy! She has Mr. Darby, or whatshisface! _I_ wanna be your forever girl!" yelled Aang. Zuko tried to cover his mouth but missed, ending up covering Suki's eyes instead.

"_... Bring your sister over here, let her dance with my just for the hell of it..._

_Chelsea, Chelsea, I believe that when you're dancin' slowly, suckin' your sleeve,_

_the boys get lonely after you leave..._"

No, thought Toph to herself, smiling in spite of herself at her crazed friends and the cheering crowd. Today _was_ awesome. And I'm going to remember it without a regret.

* * *

Day 42

"SO MUCH REGRET." moaned Toph during lunch, burying her head in her hands. "What the hell did that crackpot _give_ me? I can't believe I was stupid enough to sing in front of everyone and, and- AARGH."

Toph growled angrily and threw her carton of milk somewhere ("Ow! Who was that?").

"Yeah, it was embarrassing." Katara said from beside her, turning red at the memory. "I'm never trusting Mr. Iroh ever again. Ever."

"Hey. You."

Katara looked up and saw a boyish-looking girl holding a carton of milk.

"Not you. _You_. You threw your milk."

"Yeah? Why, did it hit you?" asked Toph, not sounding as though she cared.

"No, but it hit someone I've wanted to hit for a while. You hear of Tomo?"

"I hit Tomo?" asked Toph, brightening up considerably. "Sweet! I'm feeling better already!"

The girl smirked.

"I like you, kid. Toph, right? Name's Susan, but it's a shit name and I'll murder anyone who calls me that. Call me Smellerbee."

"Smellerbee? You're in my P.E. class, right?" asked Katara. "Why Smellerbee?"

"Yup. Katara, right? As for the name, it was the least feminine thing I could think of" she answered with a shrug. "You two mind if I sit here?"

"No problem!"

"Go for it."

"Thanks."

* * *

"Hello?"

"Hello, my good nephew! How are you feeling today?"

"Uncle. I will never, ever forgive you for what you did yesterday."

"Oh, so I recorded you and your friends' little antics! As an old man, there are very few sources of entertainment I can enjoy without too much strain-"

"_You recorded us while we were doped with that stupid drink!_"

"... Oh, my apologies. I thought you were angry because I gave you the drinks in the first place."

"..."

"Hello?"

"I don't even know what to say to you, Uncle. Why did you call."

"To make sure you were feeling alright, of course! Cactus juice is quite the experimental beverage. It's still being perfected before I can sell it to the public, and I thought it was a good opportunity to make a few tests to make sure there were no health-"

"Uncle, I refuse to come to work next week."

"And why not?" He sounded dismayed. Good.

"How could I after what you did to us?"

"Now, now, you must. You have no choice."

"What makes you say that?"

"Simple! Your class should have started five minutes ago. If you are able to answer your phone, that means you aren't in class. As a punishment for tardiness, you will be coming to work on Wednesday. I shall see you next week, nephew!"

"I hate you."


	4. Teenage Shenanigans

**Thank you to everyone who read and reviewed! You guys are totally Super Mega Radically Awesome.**

**To answer some reviews and PM's,**

**-What's under Aang's beanie/hat? That's for Toph and Aang to know and for us to furiously ponder. We shall further explore Aang's scalp later (maybe a poll? Why don't you guys vote on whether he has hair or not?)**

**-Zuko, Jet and Suki are in college, not high school (there may be more college characters that crop up here and there)**

**-Iroh is not in high school. HURR HURR HURR**

**-Toph transferred near the end of the school year (3-4 months before) as a junior. Katara and Sokka are seniors. Aang is also a junior. Yeah, Suki's older than Sokka in this fic. **

**-TRY TO FIND ALL THE REFERENCES, YOU GUYS. There's usually more than two in every chapter (Prev. Chapter included Pride and Prejudice, the actual Avatar show, Gurren Lagann and a few others...)**

* * *

P.E./Phys. Ed/Physical Education/Gym/Jock Period

"Hey, Twinkletoes!"

Aang dropped the basketball and grabbed his hat, holding it tightly to his head.

"Chill your face, man, I'm not going to take off your hat." said Toph, jogging towards him. "I've already been enlightened."

"What?" Sokka exclaimed, his eyes popping. "You saw Aang's Head?"

"Yup!"

"What happened? Why did you let _her_ see it? What was it like? Is he bald? Does he have hair? A wig? Is it true that his scalp is made of gold?"

"What the heck, Sokka?" yelled Aang, his face flushing. "Where did you hear _that_?"

"Sorry, Snoozles. But I made a solemn vow not to tell." Toph said, putting her hands up. She decided to distract him. "_Nice_ biceps!"

Sokka stopped mid-angry rant and flexed, admiring his arm.

"Really? Thanks, I've been- yeah you're damn hilarious." he said, dropping his arm and scowling at Toph's cackles.

"Now shoo, buff guy. Seniors are playing over _there_."

The older boy swore and sprinted off to his class. Aang and Toph laughed before facing each other.

"Thanks for not telling him." Aang said gratefully.

"No problem," Toph replied casually, whacking Aang's shins affectionally with her walking stick. "The Blind Bandit always keeps her word."

"Yeah, I've been wondering about that, actually! Why do you call yourself the Blind Bandit?"

"Hehehe! I'm the only one who can manage to pickpocket Sparky."

"Zuko? Wait, what do you mean?"

"I would tell you, but then I'd have to tell you about the Snowcone Incident. And Sparky will probably chop me into teeny pieces and spread me all throughout the city."

"I'd find all the pieces and put you back together." Aang said with a mischievous grin.

Toph punched him in the arm.

* * *

"Come _on_, 'Tara, just with number four! I hate number four. Goddamn word problems and their... word-problematic... ness! Help me with number four! Don't ignore me, young lady, I will bust your alarm clock again..."

Katara continued to chew the tip of her pencil, spacing out.

"Sokka, study hall is for studying. If you don't get a problem, figure it out." she said absent mindedly.

"Four. Four is such an ugly number. Why four? Why not three?"

"Four is the number of balance, Sokka."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Just help me, already! I hate math. Who invented math."

"Keep working, Sokka."

"What's with you, Katara? You're all... spacey. And weird. What's up with you? Did you drink cactus juice? I know it was a very odd and invigorating experience, but-"

"I think I'll go buy a new necklace this week." said Katara suddenly, snapping back into attention and straightening up in her seat.

Sokka stared at her.

"... What? I mean, I'm not getting my old one back, and I miss it. I'll buy one that reminds me of mom."

"Katara, losing that necklace has affected you way too much. Just forget about it, okay? Mom would understand if she was here."

"Well, she's _not_ here."

"I _mean_ it, Katara. You've been a lot snappier than normal, you've been really... I don't even know. You're just... fiercer. And I'm not sure if that's a good thing. You have to let this go."

"I did! Really!" Her brother didn't look convinced. She decided to fib a bit more."And don't worry about it. I'm just... I'm just really hyped up after Grandpa's Tai Chi Chuan lessons! Yeah! He says I take after it like a fish to water. I thought it was really ironic since-"

"Wait, what? You're taking lessons from Pakku? The one that Gran-Gran didn't want to marry? The one that made Gran-Gran take a plane to another continent before they got her back?"

"Be more respectful! He's not too bad, you know." Katara said, relieved that her brother was distracted... for now.

"I don't like him." he grumbled, crossing his arms.

"You're just mad because I got a cool amulet for Christmas while you got a Ziploc bag with four cashews inside."

"I _hate_ him."

* * *

Okay. This isn't hard. You can do this. This is easy. It's like... It's like getting a shot! Yeah. A bit of pain, but then you don't have to deal with it for another year or so. You can do this.

Zuko dialed and waited.

"Hello? Who is this?" said the voice on the other line.

"Azula? It's-"

"ZUZU!"

Zuko winced and put the phone away from his ear.

"It's been a while, _college man._ When will you stop using Star Sixty-Seven when you call me?"

"I don't want you to have my number."

"You wound me, big brother dear. How's life? What are you majoring in? Are you doing well in classes? Why don't you ever visit? It's been ever so long since you called. I'm beginning to think you don't care for your dear sister! No, really, why don't you ever visit?"

"I apologize for wounding you. Life is alright. I'm majoring in business. I'm doing well in classes. You know why I don't visit. It's been five months since I last called, if I'm right. I do care. You know perfectly well why I don't visit. Now, since I answered all your questions, can I hang up?"

"You're no fun! And come on, just visit. Mai misses you, you know!"

"I'm sure _Father_ would _love_ to see me."

"He doesn't have to know." She sounded serious all of a sudden. "I mean, it's been years since... you know. He can't do anything to you."

"He already has."

"Just come back, Zuzu. No one blames you for what happened."

"I called you because I promised I would. Not for another decade of therapy. I need to go. My roommate is coming."

"Wait, before you go."

"Yeah?"

"Mom would want you to visit."

"... I'm hanging up, Azula."

She sighed.

"Bye."

Zuko sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, furrowing his eyebrows. _Goddammit._ He pulled out a lighter and flicked it on. He stared at the small, wavering flame until it went out on its own.

* * *

"Hi, Toph!"

"Twinkletoes? Shouldn't you be going to class?"

"We have five minutes. Why aren't you in class?"

"Study hall. You?"

"Math. Uhh, listen. I was wondering..."

"Yeah?"

"Um... Weeell... You see... You... I..."

"You should take a course on speech."

"I... I... Do you..."

Aang tripped and stumbled over his words, his face turning redder by the second. Toph simply stared, vaguely wondering if she should call a doctor.

"Do you... Um... You don't _have_ to, but... Um... I mean, I was just wondering..."

"You can do it, Twinkletoes. I believe in you. I've heard you formulate complete sentences before."

"Do you... want to go hang out this weekend? You know... Together?"

The implication flew completely over Toph's head. Which is understandable, since she's pretty short.

"Sure! I'll tell Katara and Suki afterschool! Have you told Sokka and Zuko yet?"

"Uh, err, that wasn't... exactly..." Aang sighed, giving up. "Sure, I'll tell them later."

"Sweet!" said Toph. She punched him in the arm and grinned. "We're gonna have a hell of a good time. Right, Twinkles?"

He couldn't help but smile at that.

"Right."

* * *

"Hey, Sweetness."

"Hi, Toph. Where's Su- I mean, Smellerbee?"

"She's comin'. I think she's bringing someone over. I was trying to think up a nickname for her, but I can't beat Smellerbee, can I?"

"I don't think so." she said with a chuckle. "Here she comes now. There's someone with her."

"I could tell. Hey, Smellerbee. New dude." Toph waved at them, and Katara greeted them as well.

"Toph. Katara." Sus- _Smellerbee_ said, nodding at the two of them. "This is my friend. He's from Vietnam, and he's in my math class. His name is damn near impossible to pronounce, so I call him Longshot."

Longshot waved at the two of them.

"You guys don't mind if we sit here?"

"No problem!"

"Go right ahead."

"So, Longshot. How are you?" asked Katara politely.

He just shrugged and began eating his pizza.

"He doesn't talk much." said Smellerbee, putting an elbow on his shoulder and reclining. "Not if he can help it."

"What's his real name?" asked Toph curiously. "I wanna try pronouncing it!"

"It's Luo... No, wait, it's Li... Or was it La... You know what, I don't even know." said Smellerbee, throwing her hands in the air. "It's impossible to pronounce."

Toph seemed a bit disappointed at the lack of challenge. Longshot chewed quietly, although he seemed amused.

"So... Smellerbee. Got any siblings?" asked Toph, taking a bite out of her hotdog.

"Yeah. Older brother. He goes to college, and he's a total dork. Got himself kicked out of like thirty schools. Surprised he made it to college at all."

"What's his name?"

"Jet."

Katara spat out her water into Toph's face and began coughing uncontrollably. Toph's facial expression didn't change one bit.

"... Ew." she said shortly, as though she was used to such things happening to her. She grabbed a napkin and began scrubbing at her face.

"You alright, there?" asked Smellerbee, trying not to smile.

"I'm *cough* *hack* *wheeze* fine!" Katara scrambled up, still coughing. "I *cough* have to *hack*- bathroom!"

She ran to the restrooms while the three of them watched.

"..."

"..."

"..."

"So, Smellerbee. What kind of music are you into?"

* * *

Aang: hey, zuko?

Zuko: whatsup aang. why are u texting in class?

Aang: i have a question. you've known toph for a long time, right?

Zuko: uuh... yeah. why?

Aang: how long have u known her?

Zuko: since we were kids. why?

Aang: have u guys ever... u kno.

Zuko: no, i don't know. what are u talking about?

Aang: have u guys ever dated?

Zuko: christ, aang, she's like my sister. what makes u say that?

Aang: nothing, i was just wondering.

Zuko: did something happen?

Aang: not exactly. never mind.

Zuko: just tell me.

Aang: i'm in class, man. stop texting. geez. whats with u

Zuko: ... you little shit...

* * *

"Hey! Over here!" Katara and Toph exclaimed simultaneously. Suki drove towards the curb they were standing on, and they both stepped lightly into her car.

"Hey guys! How's life?"

"Alright."

"Meh. Nothin' much. How 'bout you, Fangirl?"

"Nothing out of the ordinary."

"Hey, Sweetness. What was with your little seizure today when Smellerbee told you about her brother?"

"_Smellerbee_?" Suki crinkled her nose. "That's a weird nickname."

"Err... I just drank my water too fast. You know how it is." Katara replied nervously. She began fiddling with her fingers.

"Liar." Toph poked Katara's arm.

"You know this Smellerbee's brother or something?" Suki asked distractedly. Damn this traffic.

"No!" Katara yelped, straightening up in her seat. Toph's eyes narrowed.

"Really? You don't know this Jet at all?"

Katara turned scarlet while Suki burst into laughter. She began pounding the dashboard in hysterics.

"Jet? The same Jet? PFT- AHAHAHAHAHA..."

Katara looked like she was about to strangle Toph.

"Why? You know him too? What's so funny?" Toph demanded eagerly, not noticing the older girl's death glares.

"Suki, don't you dare tell..."

The driver didn't look like she was able to say anything coherent at all. She continued laughing as she drove, occasionally wiping a tear from her eye. Toph pouted until she got a clever idea. She snapped her fingers (she had to thank Iroh for that) and turned to Katara.

"Sweetness, you have to tell me why Fangirl's laughing! Final favor!"

"No! Anything _but_ that."

"You promised! And this is _totally_ reasonable."

They argued for a few more minutes, and Toph could feel Katara's will slowly crumble. Finally-

"Ugh. Fine. Alright, you little insect. I'll tell you. When I was younger, I used to..." Katara sighed and buried her face in her hands. "I used to have a crush on Jet. There. I said it."

Toph grinned, but shook her head.

"Nope! That's only part of the story, isn't it? I can tell you're hiding something. I asked you to tell me why Fangirl's laughing!"

At this, Suki began laughing even harder.

"I can't believe... After all this time..." was all she could manage before she succumbed to more giggles.

Katara's face turned even redder.

"Well... Remember how I told you about Suki's present for me? When I was fifteen?"

"Yeah. Something about shutting you in a closet, which is a pretty lame gift."

"I agree. But, it wasn't just that."

Toph drowned out Suki's guffaws and listened harder- Katara was becoming more and more quiet for every word she spoke.

"See... She knew I had a crush on Jet, but I was too afraid to tell him. So... She kind of... trappedmeintheclosetwithhim."

The last sentence was said very softly and very quickly, but Toph understood it perfectly. She cackled along with Suki while Katara covered her face and groaned in embarrassment.

"How long did she keep you there for?" asked Toph, trying to keep a straight face.

"A little over three hours."

More laughter, more pained groans.

"What did you guys do?"

"I apologized like crazy, while he said it was alright and stuff. We sat there in super awkward silence, trying to forget the other person was there. _I still haven't forgiven you for that!_" Katara snapped, blushing furiously.

"So do you still like him?"

"No. I thought he was really nice, but it turned out he was actually this huge jerk. I haven't seen him in years, but it's still humiliating thinking about how stupid I was to like him."

"You sure it's not... _the Closet Incident_ that makes you so embarrassed?"

Suki and Toph high fived.

"I hate you both."

* * *

Aang: sokka? u busy?

Sokka: sup? i was kinda asleep, but yeah, whatsup?

Aang: you're know how you're going out with suki?

Sokka: REALLY :o

Aang: shut up. anyway, ur "experienced" when it comes to girls, right?

Sokka: I guess... why? should i be afraid?

Aang: No... i just need ur help. there's this girl i like...

Sokka: IF YOU COME WITHIN TWO INCHES OF MY SISTER, I SWEAR, I WILL DO HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE THINGS TO YOU IN YOUR SLEEP

Aang: holy crap calm down! i don't like ur sister anymore! i told u already!

Sokka: oh ok then. so who's the girl?

Aang: i'm not telling u!

Sokka: so i know her. hmm. okay, that doesn't help much...

Aang: come on, i'm serious. i tried to ask her out today, but it didn't rly work

Sokka: contrary to popular belief, bursting into song doesn't rly help. at all.

Aang: i didn't sing. i just kinda asked her out. but... yeah.

Sokka: ooh, she dump ya? we can go drink some more of that cactus juice to drown ur sorrows.

Aang: she didn't dump me. she... misunderstood what i was saying.

Sokka: aaah. u were too afraid to ask her out lyk a normal person, so she has no clue.

Aang: ... kind of. she didn't think i meant it... romantically.

Sokka: i see, i see. and when u tried to straighten it out...?

Aang: thats the thing. i didn't.

Sokka: well no wonder. do u kno if she likes u back?

Aang: no. she's not... very... romantic?

Sokka: holy shit u tried to ask out toph

Aang: what? no!

Sokka: oh. rly? huh. alright, good, cuz zuko would prob. start beating u up again.

Aang: ... do u think so? not that i'm gonna ask out toph! just theoretically, u kno. we spar together, remember? he taught me a lot. i could take him on... right?

Sokka: nothing gets in the way of an older bro whose sister is being eyed by potential rapists.

Aang: wth, i'm not gonna rape toph!

Sokka: okay, okay, i'm just sayin, good thing u weren't tryin to ask her out. who's the girl?

Aang: not telling. she's in one of my classes.

Sokka: alright. we'll continue this discussion some other time. i gtg.

Aang; alright, c ya.

* * *

Sokka: dude.

Zuko: nice job wasting a text. what's up.

Sokka: if someone were to ask out toph, how would u react?

Zuko: well first i'd find the person's address, and then their daily schedule, and then determine when they could disappear without being missed...

Sokka: ok, so u would hunt them down and probably kill them.

Zuko: yeah... jesus christ i'm turning into u.

Sokka: i'm not that protective!

Zuko: u threw a chair at jet when u guys first met.

Sokka: well... shut up. he's a dick.

Zuko: he's my roomie, i should prob. tell him u said that.

Sokka: pft. i could take him on.

Zuko: sure. so why r u asking about toph?

Sokka: just wonderin.

Zuko: does someone want to ask toph out? who? tell me now.

Sokka: i'm not namin names, man.

Zuko: i swear, i will tie u to a tree if i have to. and take your most precious possession and wave it around ur face until u break.

Sokka: no srsly. it's just a theory, i dunno if he actually will ask her out.

Zuko: whatev. whoever it is, after toph's through with them, i'll finish him off.

Sokka: what do u mean?

Zuko: toph hates relationships. love. romantic stuff like that. says it's too girly. she swore the first person who asks her out was gonna get a black eye. i'll just ruin the other eye, too.

Sokka: ... i see.

* * *

Sokka: ur sure ur not gonna ask toph out? its in your best interest that u tell me the truth.

Aang: what the heck! i'm not!

Sokka: no need to get defensive.

Aang: i'm not being defensive!

Sokka: uh huh. ok.

* * *

"Hello?"

"'Sup, Snoozles. You sent me a text with the expectation that I could read it."

"... Oh, right. Sorry."

"I'm used to it, you blundering fool. So what's up?"

"Wha- right! I was just wondering... how would you react if someone asked you out?"

Toph thought for a minute, rubbing her chin contemplatively.

"I'd have to say, quite honestly, first I'd punch their eye in."

"... Uh huh..."

"Like, really hard. They're gonna be able to stare at their own brain."

"I see..."

"Then I'd let Sparky finish them off. He'd probably punch their other eye in. So that _that_ eye was actually _looking_ at the eye that _I'd_ punched in."

"... Did you... Did you guys plan this out or something?"

"Nah. I'm just guessing what he'd do. But seriously, whoever has the guts to ask me out are gonna end up looking like 2D from Gorillaz or something."

"Why?"

"Romance is grossly icky. It's _gicky_."

"Well... alright."

"Is that all you wanted to know?"

"Yeah. Uh, see you tomorrow, Toph!"

"See ya, Snoozles."

Toph hung up and continued to watch Blues Clues.

"_Where's the clue, kids?_"

"How the hell should I know?"

* * *

Toph thought very hard about her conversation with Sokka that night. She'd never really thought about her being part of a relationship before. First off, she'd been homeschooled for most of her life, which had made meeting new people very difficult. Second, she was blind, and was usually pitied rather than actually welcomed. Also, she was _Toph_! She was the toughest damn girl in that flaky-ass school! Well, Katara had her good points, too, especially when she lost her infamous temper. Oh, and Smellerbee could kill someone just by staring at them for too long. But still! She could easily beat the organs out of anyone, guy or girl.

Of course, Toph couldn't quite speak from experience, but she'd read (forced Zuko to read aloud) many romance novels (they'd die before either of them admitted it). And Toph was quite certain that guys liked a certain type of girl. Or more exactly, one that couldn't and wouldn't beat the organs out of anything. And she did not fit in that category. According to these romance stories, ideal girls were tall, busty, delicate and so on and so forth. At a fairly early age, Toph had realized that she _wasn't_ tall (her father still called her "squirt"), she _wasn't_ busty (then again, she couldn't exactly tell), and she _wasn't_ delicate (_Kuei_ cried more than she did).

Toph had accepted that she wasn't the ideal girl. She didn't even _want_ to be the ideal girl. From what she could tell, the girls in those romance novels were the type of girls she routinely beat up for lunch money (this "bullying stage" only lasted for grades five and six, so she was okay now). Zuko had insisted that no one actually liked the girls in said romance stories, but Toph didn't believe him. So, she'd strived to be the opposite of those girls. If getting in a relationship meant that you had to act like the total numbskull that guys were into, then she was staying out of it.

She giggled at the memory of when she'd first told Zuko to read to her...

* * *

(Flashback)

Four years ago, when Toph was a wee thirteen year old, and Zuko was but an angry, angry sixteen year old, Toph had gotten a bit... _curious_. She'd known about the birds and the bees and whatnot, but she didn't _know_ about such things. And who better to teach her than her male, teenage friend? Yes, she was sure he would be able to teach her _many, many_ things.

She went to the local library, grabbed some books, and called Zuko (she was never allowed to come to his house, for some reason).

Now, don't get any odd mental images of a thirteen year old Toph and a sixteen year old Zuko going at it with the Kama Sutra in hand (whoops, too late). Toph knew what she was doing, as she always did. Zuko came over to her (gigantic) house fifteen minutes later, eager to help his friend.

"Hey, Sparky. I have some books that seem really interesting!" she had said, gesturing for him to sit on the couch next to her. Yeah, her room has a couch. This is your cue to turn away from the screen, put your fist in the air, and curse rich people. Did you do it yet? Yeah? Alright, keep reading. "Will you read for me?"

"Sure, Champ. I always read for you." Zuko replied with a smile, making himself at home. "What is it this time? More pirates? Folktales? Martial arts?"

Toph grinned and threw the book to him. She couldn't see, of course, but she could tell that he was blushing.

"... _Midnight Island: A Passionate Affair_..." He sounded like he was choking.

"Ooh, cool!" Toph grabbed a Poptart from the stash of snack foods she kept in a bowl on her desk. "Sounds raunchy."

"... Toph, an explanation would be much appreciated." Ooh, no "Champ." That meant he was serious.

"What? I've never read a romance book, I've never talked to anyone about relationships, never seen a movie on love... I just wanna see what it's like. I'm just curious."

"Please try to understand, Toph, these books are trash, they don't reflect actual relationships at all, and- and-" he sputtered, holding the book with his fingers as though it contained some kind of repulsive disease. "They're embarrassing and... and... You'll get the wrong idea, and it'll probably do some kind of horrible psychological damage to you, and..."

"It sounds like you're just defending your male pride. I understand perfectly! Reading these things have to be the least manliest thing in the list of Non-Manly things... I can understand if you don't want to..."

"It's not just that! Just..." Zuko sighed, resigned to his face. Toph grinned; she knew she'd won. "Just promise me one thing."

"What?"

"Don't try to be like the girls in this book."

"... Alright...?"

"Don't go into any relationships that are anything like this book."

"Okay..."

"Just... remember that this is as much of a book as a bag of vomit is a cheeseburger."

"Got it..."

Zuko sighed again, looked around as if to check if anyone else might be in the room, and slowly opened the neon pink book before him, careful not to touch it any more than he absolutely had to.

"_Chapter One: A Star-crossed Rendezvous._" he read aloud. He fought back a torrent of bile rising in his throat.

Toph covered her mouth as she giggled.

(Two long, arduous hours later)

"That's it. I've had enough of this bull. I refuse to do this." Zuko threw the book on the ground and resisted the urge to pull out a lighter (not only was it a nervous habit that his councilor didn't approve of, but he also seriously considered setting the book on fire).

Toph got up from her position on the floor and looked at him wide-eyed, horror written all over her features.

"What? But it was such a good part!" she exclaimed.

"You were laughing at me!" he accused, drawing his knees up from his place on the sofa.

"I was laughing at the book!"

He relaxed a bit at that. Toph noticed.

"Come ooon, Sparky! What happened after George nipped at Jennifer's collarbone, causing her to melt into a puddle of molten desire and longing?" she struggled to maintain a straight face.

Zuko let out a moan of anguish and covered his face with a pillow. His arms hung limply over the sofa.

"Please smother me," said Zuko emotionlessly. His voice was slightly muffled. "There's no other way for me to end the pain."

"It was a really good part." Toph said, pouting. Honestly, the book was about as ridiculous as it could get. But she wasn't about to let her fun stop. She grinned mischievously before sighing loudly.

"My favorite part was when they were talking about shirtless Fernando." she said dreamily. Zuko tensed.

"'_Emily couldn't help but stare at Fernando's sweaty body, and the way his tan abs rippled when he slowly stood up..._'" Toph sang loudly.

Zuko scowled and threw the pillow at Toph, which she caught.

"Throwing things at the blind girl? That's low!"

"I'm not reading it anymore. I'm serious."

"Do _you_ have rippling abs, Sparky?"

"Champion or no champion, I will _attack_ you."

"Come on, at least finish what you started! Pretty please?"

Toph stuck out her lower lip and widened her eyes. She wasn't sure what she looked like, but for some reason it worked a lot. Zuko glanced at her expression and groaned.

"Not the face, Champ."

To be honest, she looked pretty darn adorable. Of course, he would never say that to her face. Not if he wanted to live.

"Fine." he said, feeling his willpower crumbling into dust at the force of The Look. He snatched the book from the floor and opened it to the page he'd been on. "You're the devil."

Toph smiled.

(End Flashback)

* * *

"Honey? Our darling daughter is doing that thing again."

"What thing?"

"The one where she's alone in her room and she starts laughing loudly for some reason."

"It happens often, doesn't it? Just try to go to sleep, Pumpkin."

* * *

Day 43

After school, Toph had gone to the parking lot to find Suki, Aang, Katara and Sokka waiting for her. After Aang had so thoughtfully suggested that the six of them hang out, Toph had taken the liberty to call everyone and invite them to the mall that Friday. Since Suki and Zuko were the only ones with cars (Sokka's had been obliterated after an accident involving Aang's cat Momo and Haru), the plan had been to divide into groups and carpool there together.

"Sorry I'm late, guys. I left my notebook on my desk. Where's Sparky?"

"He said he's going to be late," Aang answered. "Something about traffic."

"I call Suki's car!" Sokka said with a grin, putting his arm around her shoulder. Suki blushed and elbowed him lightly.

Aang remembered the drive with Zuko and paled.

"Me too!" he exclaimed with a shudder. He wouldn't be afraid of _anything_ after that. Anything, of course, but having to get into that car again.

Toph hmphed and grabbed Katara's elbow.

"Fine! I'll be with Sparky. Sugar Queen, you'll go with me, right?"

"Err..." Truthfully, Katara would have preferred swimming to the South Pole, but she couldn't really say no to that face... "Sure. Why not."

Toph whooped and slapped Katara's back heartily (surely leaving a bruise or seven).

"Well, we better get going. Zuko's going to be here in five minutes or so, so we'll meet you there, alright?"

"Fangirl, you just want to get a headstart so that you can go make out with Snoozles faster."

"I don't know what you're talking about." Suki said casually, stepping into the driver's seat.

Katara and Toph noticed that neither of them denied it.

"Uh, bye Toph. Katara." Aang said before getting into the car. "Umm... Good luck!"

They drove off. Sokka waved to them.

"Toph?"

"'Sup, Sweetness?"

"What did he mean by 'good luck'?"

"I'm assuming he meant 'good luck catching up to us,' or 'good luck waiting for Sparky' or something like that."

"... Yeah. Right. That's it."

* * *

Aang watched uncomfortably as Suki and Sokka flirted shamelessly with one another. _I should have invited Toph to go with us..._

* * *

"Toph?"

"Yeah?"

"Is Zuko the one in the red car, driving like he's on the run?"

"I don't know what red is, but I'm assuming yes, that's probably him."

"... Maybe we should _walk_ to the mall."

"He can't be driving _that_ bad."

The car came to a screeching halt in front of them, and Zuko stumbled out of the car towards the two.

"Sorry I'm late. I was... busy." He didn't quite meet their eyes.

"Sparky, did you fall asleep?"

"... I don't know what you're talking about."

"_Hey! Hey, Toph!_"

"Oh no..." Katara and Toph moaned simultaneously.

"Who's that guy?" asked Zuko, narrowing his eyes.

"Tomo." Toph grumbled, gritting her teeth. She turned around slowly to face him.

"Well, well, well." he said, smirking condescendingly. Of course, she couldn't tell for _sure_ if he was smirking or not, but she could practically _hear_ it in that stupid, high pitched voice of his. "If it isn't Pipsqueak and Nerdgirl."

"Fuck off, Tomo."

"Woah, there. No need to be so feisty! And here I thought we were friends."

"Come on, Toph." Katara said, putting a hand on her shoulder. "Just get in the car and ignore him." She gently took Toph's walking stick and put it in the car, along with their bags. Toph didn't turn.

"What, you're taking orders from Miss Honor Roll now?"

"Just ignore him, Toph, just get in the car-"

"Shut up and let Blind Girl talk, bitch!"

"Toph, hurry up and beat the shit out of him."

Toph looked like she was about to do more than just beat him up, but she spat at his feet and turned away instead.

"Come on, Sweetness. Sparky. Let's get out of here."

Tomo looked up, just noticing the older guy standing behind them. Or more importantly, he noticed the scar covering the left side of his face. He was slightly unnerved, especially at how pissed off he looked. But when did that ever stop him? Just as the three of them turned away-

"Nice job, Miss Toph! You guys starting some kinda club for people with fucked up eyes-"

All hell broke loose. It all happened too fast for human eyes to comprehend. So let's slow this down a bit. Imagine this all happening in slow motion. Toph turned on her heel and aimed a beautifully formed fist roughly towards Tomo's cheek. Zuko mirrored her actions perfectly, on the other side of his face. Tomo's eyes slowly widened, realizing what was going to happen to him. But before Toph and Zuko could manage to hit him, something else did. Katara had grabbed the walking stick from the car's open window, and was gripping it with both hands.

She pivoted and swung it at a perfect arc, slamming it into Tomo's gut in the ideal baseball swing. His eyes popped out, and spit flew out of his mouth; he crumbled into the ground, clutching his torso and wheezing, gasping for breath. Now, no more slow motion; let's put it up to real speed.

Zuko and Toph turned to face Katara, both of their eyes as wide as plates. Katara stood there, breathing heavily, still holding the walking stick in her hands. There was a bit of silence interrupted only by Tomo's choking, a moment of hesitation, and the three of them sprinted to the car simultaneously.

"Drive! Drive, you fool!" Toph screamed, jumping into the front seat. Zuko didn't answer, but sped out of the parking lot without looking behind him.

* * *

There was about thirty seconds of silence, and then-

"Sweetness. That- that was amazing." Toph still looked surprised.

The events that had just occurred had yet to settle in.

"Katara, that really was." Zuko assured her, his eyes wide.

She registered that it was the first time he'd ever actually said her name.

"Thanks. I... I still can't process what just happened."

They continued to drive in silence. Five, ten, fifteen minutes passed.

"Oh God... I can't believe I did that!" Katara moaned suddenly, despair ringing in her voice.

It was as if a dam had broken. Zuko and Toph burst into laughter, and continued to howl for the rest of the drive.

* * *

"That was the best thing that has ever happened to me. Ever." Toph exclaimed, putting an arm around Katara. "You want a stick of your own?"

"Did you see his face when she hit him? I thought I was dreaming or something." Zuko said happily. He put his elbow on Katara's shoulder. She quickly reminded herself that it was only because Toph was too short.

"You guys suck. What if I actually hurt him? What if he tells? What's going to happen to me?"

They were walking towards the mall, and were teasing Katara about what had happened.

"Who cares? The prick deserved it. I dunno if he saw you, either. I mean, it happened pretty fast." Toph said nonchalantly. She honestly didn't know what would happen. She'd concussed Tomo before, yes, but her parents were ridiculously wealthy. They couldn't afford to kick her out. But as for Katara... Toph didn't want to think about it.

"It's true. I've been hit in the gut before. First thing that happens is your vision gets fucked up." Zuko said, nodding.

"Let's... Let's just talk about something else." Katara said. "Wonder where the others are?"

* * *

Suki and Sokka walked hand in hand through the many different stores. Aang had left them a while ago, feeling a lot like the third wheel (he decided to check out the food court). They had stopped in front of one that offered to pierce most of your body parts (they had a small list of areas they _didn't_ pierce, most of which you can guess on your own).

"Hey, Sokka! I dare you to go get a piercing!" Suki giggled. She was feeling strangely elated. She wanted to do crazy things; she felt like she could do anything and get away with it.

"No way!"

"Aww, come on!"

"Nope. No way. Absolutely not. Maybe if _you_ go get one."

"Really?"

"... I was going to say yes, but you sound oddly determined to go through with this."

Suki grabbed his hand and pulled him into the dimly lit store.

* * *

"... And that's when the wagon flew apart, causing us to fall towards the urn." Toph concluded.

"I regret nothing." Zuko added.

"You guys are both ridiculous. Did your mom ever find out who broke the table?" Katara asked. Honestly, it was really awkward hearing all these stories about her best friend and her escapades with the biggest jerk she'd ever met. But at least Toph looked like she was having fun retelling all these adventures.

"Naw, she was too busy crying over the vase. Apparently it was an antique. If Sparky here hadn't decided to grab all those Kit Kats before launching, we wouldn't have broken anything."

"Like I said, I regret nothing. Kit Kats are delicious."

"And no one noticed that they were gone?"

"We blamed it on Mr. Bumi."

"He's the old guy who lives across the street from my house."

"That's so mean! You shouldn't drag other people- Oh, Suki just texted me. She's on the third floor. Let's go!"

* * *

Aang put down the guitar and sighed. He'd been playing Guitar Hero for almost twenty minutes, now. There was only so much fake guitar riffs you could play before the thrill wore out. Not to mention that the people waiting in line for him were getting antsy. He stepped out of the store and looked around. He was getting bored. He looked over the banister to the floor below and noticed a small green figure with a walking stick. He grinned.

* * *

"... And that's when the crow escaped, causing the box to fall onto the barbecue and set fire to the coat." Toph concluded.

"I regret nothing." Zuko added.

"Of course, if Sparky here hadn't decided to take some time to buy gum, none of that would have-"

"Toph! Katara! Zuko!"

The three of them turned to see Aang run towards them.

"Hey, Aang!"

"Hi, Twinkletoes."

"Hey guys! I was waiting for you! Suki and Sokka were being really... close, so I decided to leave them alone."

"Where are they?" asked Katara. "We should meet up with them. I know they're on the third floor, but that's it."

"I dunno. They're probably looking for clothes. Come on!" Aang grabbed Toph's hand and began towards the stairs.

"Wait! Where are you going?" asked Katara.

They stopped.

"To the stairs!" Aang said with a bit of surprise.

"Why? The elevator's right here!"

"I kind of wanted to stop by the food court..." he said sheepishly. "There's an eating contest at the Golding Bakery..."

"An eating contest? A real, live, legit _eating contest_?" Toph grabbed Aang's arm and began dragging him away. "Hurry! I bet I could take you on!"

"We'll met up with you guys later!" Aang yelled, before they disappeared from sight.

Katara rolled her eyes. Thanks. Leave me with _him_.

"Come on. Elevator's here." he said from behind her.

* * *

"Ow..." Sokka muttered, lightly rubbing the new ring in his ear. "Couldn't I have gotten it on my earlobe or something?"

Suki was too busy admiring the stud on her stomach.

"You have to admit, it looks really cool!" she said with a smile. She'd found out that Sokka didn't like sharp things. At all. It was cute.

"That hurt, though..."

"Suck it up!" Suki pulled her shirt down, covering her newly pierced belly button. "I kinda want one too!"

"Want what?"

"An ear piercing."

"You already do!"

"I mean on the cartilage. Not the earlobe."

"Oh. Well, hey, maybe next time-"

Suki grinned and pulled him back into the store.

* * *

The door closed, and the elevator began to move. Zuko began to chuckle.

"What?" Katara asked, turning towards him. Was he making fun of her?

"Remember the last time we were in here, and we got stuck?"

"Perfectly. It wasn't funny at all."

"You have to admit, it had its merits-"

The lights flickered before going out completely.

"... Jesus Christ please tell me this is a joke-"

_CRASH!_

The two of them fell on the floor of the elevator and didn't move for a while.

"This... This can't be happening." Katara said.

"Mmmmph."

"Oh, right, right. Sorry." She rolled over, and heard Zuko gasping for breath.

"No problem." he said, sounding out of breath.

"..."

"..."

"This has to be a joke. Or some kind of weird... planned event."

"I wish."

"I mean it. Soon the elevator's going to move again, and when the doors open, there's going to be a camera crew there."

"Mmhm."

"This kind of stuff doesn't happen to people."

There was a click! and a small orange light- Zuko's lighter. He stood up and pressed the emergency button. Nothing. He continued pressing it, each push becoming more and more violent; after a while he flicked the lighter off.

"Katara?"

"Uhh, yeah?"

"Cover your ears."

* * *

Sokka winced in pain as he rubbed his eye. At least the pain in his eyebrow made him forget the pain in his ear.

"Why my _eyebrow_?" he whined. It felt so... weird. "It feels so... weird. And painful. Why not my earlobes? Those can be pierced, too!"

Suki grinned and put her hand to her ear, lightly feeling the stud there.

"Oh, it wasn't too bad!"

"Katara's going to bite my head off. I never let _her_ get piercings."

"Ah. Well, you don't have to worry about that."

Sokka stopped mid-step.

"... What do you mean?"

"Well, Katara seemed a bit... _miffed_ that you wouldn't let her get any piercings. So a few years ago, when she was sleeping over at my house, I kind of... pierced her ears for her."

"What?"

"Yeah. She just didn't wear any earrings whenever she was at home."

"They've been pierced for... _years_?"

"Yeah. We were kind of surprised how you didn't notice for so long."

"You! She-! You!" He was caught between being angry at Katara and being afraid of her wrath when she realized this bit of hypocrisy. He decided to get angry.

"Where is she?" he roared, marching towards the elevator.

"Where are you going?"

"To the bottom floor. And searching for her."

"Didn't you forget? That stupid elevator always breaks. Come on, let's go to the food court. Aang just texted me about some kind of eating contest."

Sokka stopped and turned around, a grin on his face.

"Why didn't you say so? Let's hurry!"

He grabbed her hand and began running to the food court.

* * *

"Hurry up and sign my name, Twinkletoes!" Toph bounced up and down in anticipation. Sure, it wasn't exactly the most manliest thing to do, but she was too excited to care. She'd never been in an eating contest before. She was sure she was going to do great.

"Done! Here, the contestants sit at the table over there." Aang couldn't help but smile wider at how excited she looked. In a way, asking her out hadn't failed, after all. Here they were, doing something they both liked, both were having fun, and both were alone.

"Hey, guys!"

Aang sighed. So much for alone.

"Fangirl! Snoozles! You guys are doing the eating contest, too?"

"Yup! And check _this_ out!"

Suki grabbed Toph's hand and brought it to her ear.

"You got a piercing?"

"Uh huh! And on my belly button, too!"

"Lemme see! Woooah... That's so cool... What about you, Snoozles? Did Fangirl make you get piercings, too?"

Sokka took her hand and brought it to his ear and eyebrow, feeling a bit proud of himself.

"Nice job!" Toph exclaimed. She crossed her arms. "I gotta say, I'm impressed. Didn't think you guys had the guts to do stuff like that!"

"Katara's going to murder you two." Aang said with a chuckle. "She'd have wanted to go with you guys."

"Where are they, anyway?" Toph asked, just remembering her two friends. "Zuko would want to do the eating contest too. Can someone call them?"

Before anyone could take out their phones, however, a man walked up to the long table where the contestants were sitting.

"We will now begin the eating contest! Here are the rules. Each contestant must grab a plate with one of our famous pastries from each station. You receive one point for every plate you manage to clean..."

"We'll call them later." Suki whispered, and the three nodded.

"... And you must take _one at a time_. Golding Bakery would like to thank the following sponsors..."

* * *

"They won't pick up." Katara said despairingly.

"What the hell are they doing?"

"I don't know! It has to be pretty important for them to be unable to pick up..."

"I hate this place."

"Me too."


	5. Eat Eat Eat Eat

***Slam***

***Slam***

***Slam***

***Slam***

Katara sighed and pressed the redial button on her phone for the umpteenth time.

***Slam***

***Slam***

***Slam***

"I give up," Katara moaned. "They just won't pick up. They must have set their phones to silent."

***Slam***

***Slam***

***Slam***

***Slam***

"I guess we'll have to keep waiting." Katara pressed. "I mean, it can't be long until someone reports that the elevator's broken. Right?"

***Slam***

***Slam***

***Slam***

"Yup. Just have to wait. At least we have our phones. I doubt this is worth calling 911 for, but still..."

***Slam***

***Slam***

***Slam***

***Slam***

"_Dammit, Zuko, if you bang your head against the wall one more time, I swear to whatever deity exists up there, I'm going to tear your limbs off._"

* * *

"... And the one who eats the most in thirty minutes wins the certificate. And now... Get ready... Get set... Begin!"

Toph didn't waste a moment- she grabbed two buns from the pile before her and shoved the both of them into her mouth. She chewed and swallowed at lightning speed before grabbing two more. Soon, her plate was empty, and was replaced by another. As she continued consuming the pastries, she took time to inspect her competition. Most seemed to be in it for the free food- _fools_. Some were alright, but definitely no match for her. There were only a few real opponents.

Suki seemed to be taking her sweet time, but Sokka was going at a faster pace. However, he was still on his first plate, although he was nearly done. She turned her attention towards Aang and nearly choked. He wasn't eating. Damn it if he wasn't _inhaling_ his food- and from what she could discern, he, too, was on his second plate. Toph narrowed her gray eyes and began eating (if physically possible) even faster. No way was she losing to Twinkletoes. No fucking way.

* * *

"... Do you have... A seven?"

"Go fish."

Zuko grimaced (it was really more of a pout than a grimace) and added yet another card to his enormous hand while Katara chuckled, amused.

"This is stupid." he said grumpily, eyeing the four cards his opponent held.

"You're just angry because you're losing."

"Go Fish is a kid's game."

"That you're losing." she pointed out. Okay, that really wasn't what he was going for.

"If we were playing a real game, like Poker or something, I could win."

"Well, we can't play Poker. There's two people here."

Using two phones, an iPod and a keychain-flashlight, the two of them had created enough light to see each other (and most of the elevator) easily. They'd had a few legitimately entertaining conversations that _didn't_ involve insults directed at one another, and were now enjoying a small bout of Go Fish using Zuko's cards. The fun was quickly dissipating on Zuko's end, however, as he was losing his third game. He didn't lose three times in a row in _anything_.

"How long have we been in here?" Zuko asked, more as a distraction than anything.

"Not that long, actually. A little under thirty minutes. There's still a good chance we'll be rescued in less than an hour." Katara answered, putting down all her cards- two pairs of aces and kings. "I win."

Zuko let out a sigh of defeat and threw his hand onto the pile between them.

"Stupid game." he grumbled good-naturedly. "How long we were here last time?"

"About two hours. Ugh, Suki told me the elevator broke often. I can't believe I forgot..."

"Woah, woah, woah, wait. You _knew_ this elevator was faulty?" Zuko exclaimed, looking up at Katara in a mixture of shock and anger.

"I forgot! What's with that tone, anyway? You sound like you're... Like you're blaming me for what happened!"

"Uh, no shit, Sherlock! Of course I'm blaming you for this!How stupid do you have to be to forget something as big as 'the elevator sucks'? This is entirely your fault! "

"Are you kidding me? Because _I_ happen to be the one who built this thing and _I'm_ the one who maintains it, and _I was the one who wanted us to get trapped in the elevator_!" Katara's voice became higher and higher at every word, until she found herself screaming shrilly at the boy in front of her. Zuko found himself wincing and quickly composed himself, but she wasn't done yet.

"I can't believe you! And all this time I thought you were actually an okay person! You think I _wanted_ to be stuck here? _Huh_?" She glared at him furiously and waited for some sort of answer. When none came, she only became madder. "Well then, fine! _Fine_! Clearly _every single thing_ is _**my**_ fault! Isn't it?"

"What the hell are you talking about?" Zuko demanded, finding his voice. "You're insane! And you're the one who wanted us to take the elevator. If anything, you _should_ be apologizing."

That didn't help at all, of course. But most males aren't exactly the most eloquent of all speakers, especially in an argument against an irate girl. His words added fuel to a fire that could have been easily put out with an apology; Katara found herself very, very close to committing homicide.

"Fine! _Fine_! You're right! And I'm completely, utterly, totally wrong! I'm sorry for getting us trapped in the elevator! I'm sorry for pounding your ass at a card game! I'm sorry for ruining your hoodie, making you carry me around, looking at your scar, _sitting in your car, breathing your air_!"

She breathed heavily, her face flushed from yelling. Zuko was (admittedly) nervous. He'd never had a verbal confrontation with a girl before. Well, okay, he had, but not with a girl who wasn't his sister (or Toph) and was actually _right_ in being angry. But he was still proud, and wasn't one to lose an argument- no matter whether he was wrong or not. Now, had he apologized, he may have had some kind of chance. But his pride got in the way; he thought of the most immature thing he could say and blurted it out without thinking.

"Well, you _should_ be sorry."

He mentally slapped himself before the words had fully left his lips. Katara let out a screech reminiscent to a jaguar and leapt.

* * *

"Alright, competitors, we've got five minutes left in the clock! So far it's a dead tie between Competitor Nine and Competitor Fourteen, both of whom are on their fifteenth plate, a new record by six! Followed by Competitor Twenty Four in second, with seven finished plates, and Competitor Two with six!"

Sokka held his gift card proudly to his chest; it was his prize for being second place. Suki patted his back (she, along with roughly twelve others, had tied for fifth with four plates), making him promise to treat her sometime. Honestly, she couldn't understand where he hid the food. Each plate had at least a dozen pastries, all of which were only slightly smaller than her head. But what she couldn't believe the most was Aang and Toph.

Both of them were consuming their food at speeds that she was certain were impossible to attain; she couldn't even _begin_ to image how much damage they were doing to their digestive system! She continued to watch with a mix of horror and sick fascination at the two before them. Toph seemed to have converted her mouth into some sort of trans-dimensional vacuum. Aang tore away at a bun like some sort of starving t-rex.

"Wow. If all that pie didn't make me lose my appetite, watching these two beasts just did." Sokka commented with a proud grin at the two. "I mean, I can't even tell if they're chewing or not."

"I'm pretty sure that it's my responsibility as a citizen to send them to the scientific community for study." Suki dryly responded with a slow shake of her head. "I mean, what would _you_ do if you found two people that were capable of _inhaling_ custard cakes?"

"If you're going to send these guys to a lab, you might want to wait until after they've finished. I think I see lightning forming between them."

And Sokka was right. Not that actual lightning was forming between them, of course, because that would be reasonably alarming and would be a good reason to evacuate the building rather than sitting there and eating. But the tension between the two was fierce. They were evenly matched from every bite, chew and swallow. The competitors stayed in their seats and gaped at them. People entered the store without buying anything, until the place was completely packed. Onlookers pressed their noses against the shop windows. The only one who wasn't completely focused on the battle was the owner of the bakery, who was sniffing and wiping away tears (oh, he was so happy, he was going to get so much business after this, bless them). Toph and Aang paid no heed to any of the attention. Both had long abandoned any desire to wipe their mouths, and their faces were covered in cream, sugar, chocolate, and other delicious foodstuffs. Had the atmosphere hadn't been so heated, they might have looked borderline ridiculous.

"Thirty seconds left! It's still a dead tie between Nine and Fourteen, both of whom are on their seventeenth plate!"

It was then that it happened. The two were still evenly matched, consuming the pastries at a speed that caused the weaker onlookers to choke back vomit, when Toph felt something was wrong. It was a subtle feeling, a slight pressure in the back of her throat that went almost unnoticed at the barrage of cream puffs forced into her mouth. But the pressure grew, and grew, until Toph couldn't ignore it any longer. She kept pressing forward, eating as fast as she could, but it was getting harder to ignore the feeling. There was five seconds left on the clock, both of them were on their last two pastries when finally;

_*Hiccup!*_

Toph paused, surprised, but it was too late. In the split second she had hiccuped, Aang managed to force the rest of the plate's contents down his throat before the bell rang, signaling the end of the contest. Cheers erupted throughout the store, and Toph only stared in shock before getting mad.

"NO!" she roared, pounding her fists on the table. It wasn't so much of a "no" as it was a "_**NOOOOOOOOOOOoooo**_," but you get what I mean.

Aang stopped his trademark victory dance and noticed that his opponent was about to go into a rage.

"I can't believe I- *hic*- lost! What the hell *hic* happened?" she snarled, looking like she was going to take a bite out of the plate. Aang was too proud of his victory to care about his physical well-being.

"Simple, Toph! You got the hiccups!"

"Lies and libel!" she hissed angrily ("Actually, I think you mean slander," Sokka stated matter-of-factly, but his comment went unnoticed). "I do not. Get. Hiccups!"

She punched his arm as she said that, accentuating every word with physical abuse. It would have been quite intimidating had she not hiccuped immediately after that. She felt her face grow hot and wondered if she was blushing. She better not have been blushing. Blushing was for pansies, and she was _not_ a pansy. And the way Twinkletoes was giggling, she was probably blushing. Toph hmphed as masculinely as she could manage and punched his arm one more time.

"Come on, Fangirl. I need to go fume in outrage." she said, linking arms with her friend and walking out the door towards... Well, anywhere.

Sokka and Aang smiled sheepishly at the two, but high fived once they were out of sight. Bro's who won eating contests were a bit more important than angry girl talks. They'd catch up to them later.

* * *

Fact: Toph eventually did decide to (grudgingly, reluctantly, unwillingly) accept that Aang had won... This time.

Fact: Aang made amends with Toph by giving her a gift card (the second place prize she'd forgotten behind) and a box of red velvet cupcakes (he'd bought at the bakery).

Fact: The four of them set off to find some other fun things to do. None of them checked their phones for missed calls.

Fact: Katara and Zuko were rescued by (once again), two security guards and an electrician, and that is where our story picks up again.

* * *

The two mall cops pried open the elevator door and immediately thought that the two people inside were viciously making out. They were shocked speechless before realizing that they were, in fact, fighting (and rather violently at that). And you can't blame them, really, I mean they catch more kids making out than they catch people in a fist didn't waste any time to pry the two off of each other; the male looked like he'd just been thrown down a flight of stairs, while the girl seemed relatively fine.

"_I hate you_!" the girl had screamed angrily, struggling against the guard's grip. "I _never_ want to see your damn face _ever again_!"

With that, she elbowed the guard off and stomped away, her hands curled into fists and her eyes burning. The boy made to follow her (damn, what a scar...) but was held back for questioning ("You two can make up later, I'd like you to answer a couple of questions for me about what exactly happened...").

* * *

Sokka pounded away at the Rock Band Drum Set, playing Expert Mode of In Bloom by Nirvana while Suki played guitar to his left. Bored, Aang had borrowed his phone to play Tetris.

"Sokka? It keeps interrupting the game, asking me if I want to buy the actual game."

"Just press 'Ignore.'" he said distractedly. Ooh, this part was hard. His left hand was a bit too tense, he'd almost missed a few notes... Well, almost.

"Wait, Katara's calling you right now."

"Uuh, put it up to my ear."

Aang gingerly placed it near Sokka's ear, trying to avoid his flailing elbow.

"Hello?"

"Sokka?"

"Hey, Katara. What's up? I'm kinda busy..."

"I want to go home."

"What? Why?"

"I just... He... I'll tell you later, just, can we please go home now?"

Sokka actually put the drumsticks down and picked up his phone. Suki pressed pause and looked at him with worry. It had to be pretty important if he was willing to give up his 83 note streak.

"Tell me what happened, Katara."

"I will. Later. Just... please?"

"Fine. Where are you?"

"I'm near the entrance."

"Alright, I'll call Zuko and tell him to-"

"_No_!"

Sokka was surprised at how vehemently she refused his help. Had something happened between the two?

"Alright, I'm giving the phone to Suki, okay?"

"Okay."

Suki received the phone and began talking to her too quietly for him to hear. He looked back at Aang and Toph. They were two aisles down, playing what looked like an intense game of Bop It! with one another. They looked like they were having a lot of fun...

"Sokka. I'm driving her home. Can you come with me? You don't have to, but since you're her brother, I think you can calm her down."

"Of course! Just... I think we should leave Aang and Toph."

"Good idea. Hey guys!" Suki yelled, turning towards them.

"Yeah?" Toph yelled back, quickly Twist!-ing the small yellow nob on the ridiculous-looking device.

"Katara's feeling sick, so we're driving her home. Why don't you guys go with Zuko?"

"Sure!"

Aang frowned, not wanting to get in that car again, but was too busy Bop!-ping the center button to make any sort of argument.

"Come on, Twinkles, we're on level twelve. Don't lose now!"

* * *

Katara didn't speak for the rest of the ride home, too disgruntled to answer any of Suki and her brother's questions.

"Where were you?" Suki asked for the twelfth time.

Katara only shrugged and continued to glare out the window, her arms crossed and a scowl that could kill small animals.

Suki and Sokka glanced at one another worriedly, but kept silent for the rest of the ride home.

* * *

"I can't believe you!"

"I _said_ I was sorry!"

"No! This is beyond forgiving! This is... This is unacceptable!"

"I'm really, really sorry, Toph. I mean it!"

"Level twenty! _Twenty_! Do you know how many fourth graders aspire to reach past level _seven_? It specifically said to Pull! it, but noooo! You had to panic and Bop! it instead!"

"We were going really fast! I'd gone to moving by listening for the beginning syllable. The 'P' in 'Pull it' sounds very similar to the 'B' in 'Bop it,' and I panicked."

"Auuugh." Toph groaned, throwing her hands into the air. "This sucks. And I was hoping to get past level twenty five, at least."

"Where's Zuko? We can't go home without him..." Not that he minded just hanging out with Toph, of course. But she was irate, and a distraction was necessary.

"That's not exactly true. We could always walk if we had to. Or hitchhike. Maybe get a taxi."

"Have you tried calling him?"

"Of course! Who do you think I am? He says he's in the parking lot. He sounded mad, so he's probably sulking. Or maybe I just woke him up."

"Oh."

They didn't speak for a while.

"... Shouldn't we look for him?"

Toph shrugged.

"Probably. If he's really pissed, though, I'd rather leave him alone to chill for a while."

"Oh."

There was another pause.

"What if he leaves without us?"

"He won't. I said we'd be there soon. He'll wait."

"Ah."

The two of them fell into a peaceful silence, sitting inside the display tent at the camping section of Dick's Sporting Goods.

"We should go camping, sometime." Aang suggested.

"Yeah."

"I feel like we'd have a lot of fun, camping."

"Mmhm."

"All of us, gathered around a campfire. Katara could cook for us, and we'd all complain..."

"Ooh, Sparky could make the fire. He's a complete pyromaniac, that guy."

"And Sokka could go fishing! Suki can be assistant fisherman/chef."

"What would we do?"

Aang thought for a minute before answering: "I'd be the leader, of course. I guess you'd get the firewood."

Toph punched him. "_Lame_! Why are _you_ the leader? And why do I get such a crap job? Can't I be assistant, too?"

"Because I thought of the idea!" Aang exclaimed, rubbing his arm with a grin. It was going to be completely black and blue, tomorrow. "And it's not a crap job. It's very important. And there can't be more than one assistant."

"That makes no sense!"

"I'm the leader, and I make the rules! My rule is that there can't be more than one assistant."

"Whatever." Toph grumbled, smiling. "Sparky doesn't need firewood. He could make fire just by punching the air hard enough."

"You're just trying to get out of your firewood-collecting job."

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"Nuh uh!"

"Uh huh!"

"Well, maybe a _little_. But I demand another job, or I'm forming a coup against you."

"Fine. You can... carry the stuff."

Toph punched him again.

"Ouch! Alright, how about... Okay, you can lead the way whenever we hike somewhere."

"Seriously? It's like you _want_ us to get lost."

"Sure! Then we have to use our highly advanced navigational skills to get back home."

"What skills? We couldn't navigate our way across the street without a gps."

"Yeah, well, Zuko can't make fire out of nothing."

"That was a joke!"

"I know, I know. But honestly, it'd be a lot of fun camping, don't you-"

The flap of the tent opened up abruptly, surprising the two teenagers.

"Excuse me!" an employee cried out in anger. "You kids can't be in here! Get out!"

Aang didn't waste any time; he grabbed Toph's hand and quickly crawled out through the back flap of the tent and ran out of the store. Toph stuck her tongue out at the employee, who was shaking his fist at the both of them.

* * *

Toph was right about Zuko. He _was_ sulking. He was sitting in his car, the chair reclined so that he was almost lying down, and he was mentally beating himself up, as most angsty guys tend to do often. He'd tried looking for Katara, but that goddamn interrogation had taken too much time and she'd gotten away (_No_, he wasn't claustrophobic, thank you very much, _no_, he didn't rape or sexually harass her, what the hell, no, he wasn't diabetic, how the hell did that even matter, _could he leave now_, goddammit, _no he did not rape or sexually harass her, he already fucking answered this question already and he was leaving regardless of what you peons say_...)

_Stupid, stupid, stupid..._

During their half-hour stay in the elevator, he'd been pleasantly surprised to find that Katara wasn't the spoiled brat he'd initially assumed she was. Toph had been right; she usually was. In fact, they had actually had an entertaining time. Well, as entertaining a time you could have in a stuck elevator. And the fun had shriveled away sometime around the last five minutes they were trapped. His temper got the best of him, and his pride had kept him from apologizing like any normal person would.

_So. Damn. Stupid._

It had been such a relief, too, once he'd realized that there would be no more awkward moments with only Toph to make them speak, or anymore vicious arguments. And then he went and botched it up. If his anger had a face, he would probably punch it. Zuko wondered if he could make himself beg for forgiveness, or if his pride would force him to continue kicking himself until it was too late. He wondered if she would forgive him at all. If his pride had a body, he would probably cut off its limbs. Speaking of cuts...

He licked his split lip and rubbed his bruise cheek gingerly.

He had been extremely surprised that she'd attacked him, when she hadn't even yelled at him when they'd first met (he remembered what he had said to her and grimaced). He hadn't fought back, of course, because hell if she didn't have every right to slap him across the face. But she _knew_ what she was doing when she was punching him within an inch of his life. Either she was a lot better than he'd expected, or he wasn't as good as he thought.

He couldn't decide which one was worse.

* * *

"About a Girl, The Acadamy Is."

"Uh... Good Girls Gone Bad, Cobra Starship."

"My Girl, Temptations."

"Uptown Girl, Billy Joel."

"You said that already! Try again!"

"Err... I Kissed a Girl, Katy Perry."

"Girls, Beastie Boys."

"Uh... Um... Uh..." Aang stuttered, and slumped his shoulders. He was defeated.

Toph let out a whoop of victory and patted Aang's back, laughing.

"You can't win against me, Twinkletoes! I listen to more music in a day than you listen to in a _week_. Don't be surprised that I know more songs than you do."

"No way! I challenge you again."

"Alright!" Toph cracked her knuckles, grinning. One of Twinkletoes' best points, in her opinion, was that he was competitive as hell. "What's the challenge word this time?"

"Hmm... How about... Dance?"

"Pft, easy. Dance Dance, Fall Out Boy."

"The Safety Dance, Men Without Hats."

"Just Dance, Lady Gaga."

"Dance With the- Holy crap, what happened to Zuko?"

They stood outside said boy's car (he was asleep); Aang gaped at the split lip, and the bruise on his cheek.

"Why? What happened to Sparky?" Toph demanded.

"He... I think he got in a fight."

"What? With who? What's wrong with him? What does he look like?"

"I don't know! He has a cut on his lip and his face looks pretty bad, but he seems fine. He's asleep."

"Move aside, Twinkles."

Toph pounded on the window as hard as she could (Aang was surprised the glass didn't shatter); Zuko awoke with a start, bit his lip, and began bleeding again. Aang couldn't hear him, but he could read lips well enough to see that Zuko was quite... _displeased_.

"It's about goddamn time! Where the hell were you?" he shouted at the two, opening the window after wiping his bleeding mouth clean.

"We got lost." Toph answered shortly, unfazed. "Now tell us what happened to you."

"Nothing." he grumbled. He unlocked the car and scowled at nothing in particular while the two got in. Zuko backed out of the parking space and drove out of the lot. His passengers quickly put on their seatbelts after almost running over a mailbox.

"Doesn't seem like nothing to me." Toph said, crossing her arms. She wasn't letting him ignore her for long. Aang stayed silent, preferring to stay out of conflict (also, he'd learned that Angry Zuko plus Car equalled horrors beyond all comprehensible horrors). He would step in only if things got out of hand.

"_It's nothing_."

"Don't give me that bull."

"Toph, just forget about it."

"No! Tell me, already! It's not like I'll laugh or anything. Not even if you fell down the escalators or something."

Aang imagined a stick figure falling down the escalator for four hours straight and tried not to giggle.

"Sparky, I will bruise your _other cheek_ if you don't tell me what happened."

"Augh! Fine! Christ... I got stuck in the elevator with Katara, we fought. There! Happy?"

Toph remained stoic while Aang's mouth fell open.

"You got in a fight with _Katara_? _She_ did that to you?"

"My God, Sparky, what the hell did you do to make Sweetness so... Not sweet?"

"_Nothing_!"

"More bull. She doesn't do stuff like this on a regular basis! Either you really pissed her off, or you got in the elevator with an impostor. Speaking of which, what the hell is it with you two and getting stuck in the-"

"She told me that she knew that the elevator was busted, but forgot until we were already trapped. I yelled at her for being an idiot. She yelled back. Then she assaulted me."

Aang and Toph glanced at each other and back.

"... That... Well..." Aang was unsure how to begin. He rubbed the back of his head, still thinking. "You... I think she... Err..."

Toph swiftly stepped in.

"Dude. That was totally your fault."

"_What_?"

There was a dangerous swerve around a woman on a bike.

"I mean it! Listen to yourself! Even _you_ know that you were wrong to get all pissy on her."

Zuko grumbled incoherently, refusing to look back at her.

"I think you should apologize." Aang said softly, not wanting to provoke him and cause another near-death incident. "I mean... She's more sensitive about this kind of stuff than she lets on."

Toph nodded, but he didn't answer. The rest of the drive was silent.

* * *

"I wonder what happened?"

"I don't know... She sounded really pissed when I mentioned Zuko, so I'm guessing he had something to do with it. I swear, when I get my hands on him..."

"It's been a while since I've seen her this mad... do you think they got in a fight?"

"My baby sister doesn't _fight_. She's too busy filling in for Mom to fight."

Suki raised an eyebrow. "Really."

"Well... Okay, she's learning Tai Chi or something from our stupid grandpa. But that doesn't count."

"Whatever you say. Well, at least some good came out of this."

"What? My sister's mad enough to punch a baby koala. She won't come out of her room. What _good_ is there?"

"She was too busy being mad to notice your piercings."

"... Oooh... Huh. You're right."

"I usually am."

"Pft. You keep telling yourself that. My eyebrow still hurts, you know!"

"Oh? Then how come you didn't say anything about it for the last hour or so?"

"... I forgot."

"Then it clearly doesn't hurt nearly as much as you say it does."

"Yeah it does!" Sokka began groaning loudly, throwing his arms in the air in mock agony. "Augh! The pain! It's unbearable! It's... It's like someone poured acid on my eye!" He rolled around the sofa, still moaning.

Suki giggled.

"Poor thing. Would you like me to kiss it better?"

Sokka immediately stopped moving.

* * *

"Maybe you should text her and apologize?"

"No way, Twinkletoes! Don't be ridiculous. You never apologize to a girl via text. That's just an insult. He should call her."

"Yeah! Wait... But she could always just ignore the calls. How about just showing up at her house?"

"Theoretically that could work. It'd show he really is sorry and whatnot. But if she really doesn't want to see him, she could slam the door in his face. Or attack him again. Or maybe call the cops and say that he broke in or something!"

"Dang, I didn't think of that. Would Katara really do something like that?"

"You never know. 'Hell hath no fury like a woman on her period.' Admittedly, I don't think Sweetness is on her period, but it fits the situation nicely."

"That's not how that phrase goes. Also, I feel intensely uncomfortable talking about whether or not she's on her period."

"My bad, Twinkles. And like I was saying, you can never tell with Katara. I'm assuming Suki is talking to her now, and I'll just join the girl talk and find out about her state of mind."

"And then you'll tell Zuko, right?"

"Right! And then we'll further chart his course of action."

"Okay, so, say that she isn't in the mood to see him. What should he do? Get her a gift?"

"Yeah! I'm no expert, but my estimate on the gift is that it has to cost more than seven dollars, but less than fifteen. He doesn't want to look like he's just picking up random junk from nearby garage sales, _nor_ does he want to look like he's trying to buy his way back to her good side. But this is all approximations; I'm not sure about her specific preferences."

"And even then, what could he buy? It has to be more of like a... '_Please accept my apologies, it's all my fault_' kind of gift, and not a '_I'm trying to woo you and go out with you_' type of gift. And it can't be something as impersonal as a Hallmark card."

"Nothing's more impersonal than a Hallmark card. No matter how witty or emotional."

"And it can't be really creepy-personal, like a picture of him as a baby or something."

"Hehehe! Or like... Like his favorite socks or something."

"Pft- Ahahaha! Or maybe his boxers!"

"_Hahahaha,_ his chewed up gum!"

"_Ha_! A bit of his hair!"

"A bottle of his s-"

Oh **hell** no. She was **not** finishing that sentence.

"_WE'VE BEEN SITTING IN THE DRIVEWAY FOR TWENTY MINUTES NOW, HURRY UP AND GET THE HELL OUT OF MY CAR!_" Zuko roared.

"... -aliva..."

* * *

Katara was on her bed, her still tied back, staring contemplatively at the ceiling. She held Daisy (her stuffed whale doll) close to her chest, as she often did in times of deep emotional turmoil (the last time she'd used it was when Sokka had accidentally used his miniature catapult to shoot a brick into her room, shattering the vase she'd made in seventh grade). She held up the doll and had it face her. She could see her reflection on the shiny black button eyes of the ever-smiling creature; she looked tired. Well, that wasn't a big surprise. She _felt_ tired.

"What's the matter with that jerk anyway, Daisy?" she asked aloud (softly though, so that no one could hear her, just in case someone was listening for some reason).

"It's okay, Katara! I bet he has a good reason for being such a dick. Genetics, perhaps? Or maybe he had a rough childhood." Daisy replied helpfully.

Okay, so the thing didn't _actually talk back_. I mean, that's just ridiculous. It's a _stuffed animal._ If it was actually talking, Katara probably would have thrown it across the room and run out of the house, screaming about demon possession and so on. And she wasn't going crazy, either. You see, from a young age, Katara often had small "conversations" with Daisy to alleviate stress and make sense out of any confusing, jumbling thoughts she may have. Daisy's dialogue was in Katara's head.

"I don't know, Daisy. I'm not sure if being a jerk is genetic. And I don't want to think about his childhood. I barely know him. And I want to be mad at him, not feel sorry for him."

"Why do you want to be mad at him? You don't even like being mad. Being mad is tiring, you said so yourself!"

"That's different! He actually deserves it. He's rude, condescending, arrogant..."

"He seemed like a nice guy before you two fought. Remember when you guys played Go Fish? Wasn't that fun? And remember when he told you about how he tried to get Aang's hat off with that bucket and fishing pole? That made you laugh so hard!"

"Daisy, you're not helping. I _want_ to be angry."

"Do you?"

Katara put the toy down and sighed. Did she? She wasn't sure. Angry wasn't exactly her specialty. Daisy was helping her less and less, these days. If anything, she'd ended up with more questions than she'd begun with. One thing was for sure; she sure as hell wasn't letting him off the hook anytime soon. She heard Suki and her brother in the living room and guessed what they were up to. Groaning, she pulled a pillow over her face and screamed in frustration.

Today was such a long, stupid, crappy day. She got in a fight with Jerkface. Her brother and best friend were making out. She'd hit Tomo, and even though he deserved it more than Zuko, she was bound to get in extremely serious trouble. What if she was suspended? Or worse, expelled? Katara rubbed her neck softly, still unused to the vulnerable, empty feeling she got when she couldn't feel the smooth stone of her mother's necklace there.

* * *

Toph wasn't the thinking type.

... Let me rephrase that.

Toph was the action type.

There, that's a little better. Yeah, it doesn't sound as degrading. Okay, let's continue.

Toph was the action type. She was quick to act, quick to speak. Methodically planning out her moves was something she just did not do. Everything she did was out of pure and simple instinct. She didn't bother censoring or editing her thoughts as the flowed out of her mouth. Thinking and planning ahead, even stopping to ponder or contemplate life was (for the lack of a better word) unthinkable. That was why this moment was so odd; some might say it marked a turning point.

Toph was in her room, eating the red velvet cupcakes Aang had bought her earlier as a peace offering, and listening to music on the mp3 player Sokka had given her a few days prior. She wasn't really listening to the lyrics; she was too busy (gasp) thinking about her friends. She cared more for the group than she let on. With the exception of Zuko and Kuei, she hadn't had many friends until she had stopped being homeschooled. She'd had many "guests," or people her parents introduced her to whose names she promptly forgot, and usually never saw again. She'd also had many "acquaintances," or people she saw multiple times but didn't really consider "friend." Such people included Old Man Bumi across the street, and the Boulder. He was an ex-wrestler who had become Head of Security at her dad's company. She didn't know his real name, but had liked the way he constantly referred to himself in the third person.

But real, true friends? Only Zuko, her non-biological brother, and Kuei, the bookish subject of many of her pranks who'd tutored her every so often. When she finally met a group of people she could be with, she was more than excited; she was absolutely overjoyed. But she didn't show it, of course. Admittedly, Toph had been afraid, at first. She thought people would ignore her, or worse, pity her because she was blind. After her encounter with Tomo, she was sure she'd end up the school pariah. When Katara had sat with her at lunch, she had almost kissed her. Almost.

Yup. She appreciated having such a close knit group she could trust. She'd waited too long for her pansy parents to let her get out and socialize, and she had lots of plans for them to hang out together and have fun; to make up for all those lost years alone in this stupid house. And she sure as hell wasn't letting some stupid, faulty metal box break apart her two best friends. Katara easily trusted and forgave; for her to become so angry as to hit someone without regret was a clear indication that she meant business. Zuko was as stubborn as a mule, and his sense of "pride and honor" was so enormous it probably had its own gravitational field. Yup, they were a complete mess. It was up to her to clean it all up. Operation STFUAA (Shut The Fuck Up And Apologize) would begin as soon as possible- Twinkletoes could be her accomplice, she supposed.

Toph stuffed another cupcake into her mouth, relishing the rich taste. Speaking of Twinkletoes... There was an odd one if there ever was one. She couldn't get him at all. Most people had a certain pattern- a kind of aura. But him- he went all over the place; a balance of everything that she couldn't predict. He was competitive, stubborn, and didn't give up. He was confident, funny, and spoke his thoughts as clearly as she did (albeit much less explicit). But she could say _one thing_, just one little thing that didn't even mean anything, and he became this stuttering, awkward train wreck that couldn't piece together a coherent sentence.

She didn't get him at _all_. And this was literal, too. Her ability to feel vibrations gave her quite an acute "people radar"; sometimes in the right conditions, she could tell if a person was coming before they were even in the same room as her. After a while, she'd honed this skill even further. Soon she could make an accurate guess about their weight, whether they had a favored leg, and so on. But Twinkletoes was a confusing, maddening, irritating _mystery_. For one thing- he had a really, really light step. She had assumed that he was one of those super thin, lanky teenagers that populated their school. Out of curiosity, she'd grabbed his arm and was surprised to find that he was relatively muscular and told him so (for some reason, this made him go into Stupid Mode, stuttering and whatnot).

This was fairly irritating; Toph could usually guess the weight or body type of the person in question. When she tried to lift him up (causing him more confusion and making him stammer even harder), she'd found that it was almost as hard as lifting Zuko. So she'd been wrong about Aang. Toph was _never_ wrong.

It was embarrassing to admit it, but along with his abnormally soft steps, it was hard to discern his location at times. As she'd told him before, it seemed as though he was moving whenever, _wherever_, a breeze rolled by. Instead of walking straight like a _normal_ person, he'd often pivot in mid-step and walk towards something that caught his attention, or walk in a weird zig-zagging pattern like some kind of goddamn _bee_. It was in these moments that she wouldn't know where he'd gone off to, and for a brief, brief second, she really _was_ blind.

And that pissed her off more than anything. It didn't matter that, no matter what, he'd end up coming back to her. The fact that there even _were_ times where she couldn't follow him was the problem. Toph did not like being unable to do something she wanted to do. So she grabbed his arm in a death grip, refusing to let go, even when he'd begun his obnoxious stutter again. As unmanly as that was, she was glad he didn't say anything about why she'd done it, or how out of character it was. In fact, if she didn't know any better, she would have guessed he'd enjoyed himself, the way he was chattering after getting over Stupid Mode.

Yup. He was a real piece of work. She popped the last cupcake into her mouth and reminded herself to buy more of these sometime. Perhaps next time she could share with old Twinkles himself.

She'd get the larger share, of course.

* * *

Suki dreamt. It was a wild, crazy kind of dream. The kind that makes you wish you could return to that dream all the time, and you always remember it. The fine details were fuzzy, as most dreams are. She was sitting upright at the edge of a large, open field. She was happy and relaxed; she wished she could always feel this way. She saw Sokka, first.

He was tall, and strong. There was a... mature look about it, despite that goofy, lopsided grin he always wore. He held a sword in one hand, with stars swirling around the blade, and a boomerang. Not that toy one- this one was sharp, and looked like it could inflict quite a bit of damage. Sokka, still grinning, kneeled before her and spoke. But she couldn't hear a word.

"I can't hear you!" she tried to yell, but she couldn't move her lips.

Sokka kept mouthing something, but only silence came out. He finished what he was saying and stood up. He walked to the middle of the field and threw the boomerang high in the air. Suki stared at it until it disappeared into the sky. She looked back to where he'd been standing, but found that he was gone. Katara was there instead. She tried to greet her, but she still couldn't speak. Katara didn't seem to hear her- her back was facing her.

Something about her was different, too. She was taller, and her hair was down; but the most noticeable difference was the way she held herself, making her seem strong, elegant. Suki tried standing up to try and walk towards her, but she couldn't.

Katara raised her arms high in the air- there was an odd rushing noise, coming from all around her- and water burst from the ground and intertwined with her arms, still outstretched. The water kept coming, wrapping around Katara's form. It seemed to consume her, and it began to rain heavily. Soon there was too much water, the field was flooded, Katara was gone, and she was drowning, drowning, unable to move...

Things began to go more quickly, after that, like a sped-up movie. Details and imagery were replaced by her thoughts and emotions. Suddenly she was encased in an enormous ball of ice, still sitting and paralyzed. Suki waited and waited, but she couldn't move. She was alone, completely alone, and scared. Everything was so dark. Her earth powers were of no use if she was stuck in a giant iceberg! She had to get out, she had to escape, her honor was at stake, she had to reclaim what was hers, she had to find that boy...

* * *

Fact: Suki awoke with a start, panting and sweating and basically a giganto wreck.

Fact: She spent the next hour fitfully tossing and turning, unable to go back to sleep.

Fact: She spent an hour after that absentmindedly doodling the more vivid parts of her dream.

Fact: She spent an hour after _that _Googling sites concerning symbology in dreams. She still didn't have any idea what the hell her subconscious was trying to convey to her, but found the whole dream interpretation thing quite interesting.

Fact: She finally went into a dreamless, two-hour long sleep after another three hours reading up on dreams.

Fact: She did not take very good class notes that later that day.

* * *

Wondering what some of the other characters were doing during the Gaang's excursion at the mall? Weeell...

* * *

Sus- _Smellerbee_ and Longshot were, quite literally, sitting in a tree. It was on a hill in a small field in Smellerbee's backyard, and was one of those trees that kids always try to climb because they could. For the sake of privacy, however, Smellerbee had chased said kids off, claiming it as her property (it really wasn't). Now they sat on a branch, Longshot carefully throwing pebbles at a pond while Smellerbee carved her name into a tree.

"... I'm telling you, Longshot. One day, I'm going to punch that loser's face in." Smellerbee was saying. "Don't you think he's such a loser?"

She wasn't really expecting an answer; he didn't speak. But he did shrug his shoulders. _Can't really say._

"Of course he is!" she carved the second "L" of "Smellerbee" into the trunk of the tree with more ferocity than the other letters. "How dare he say something like that to my face!"

Another shrug, a small gesture with his hand. _Well, it happens. What can you do._

"I can punch that loser's face in!"

A cock of the eyebrow. _Oh, really?_

"You sayin' I don't have the guts to do it?"

The boy put his hands up in defense.

"That's right! Oh wait, that reminds me." Smellerbee began digging through her backpack (which was slung over the branch above them) and pulled out a small, thick book. "You left your book in math. I was going to give it to you during lunch, but I forgot."

He smiled and took it from her hands.

"Thank you, Smellerbee."

She fell off the tree.

* * *

**And that's Chapter Five! _Anonymous I Think _****requested Smellershot, so I thought I'd put in this small bit. Hope this wasn't too bad, and there'll be more later on!**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed, I love you all very much in a platonic, non-sexual kind of way! Feel free to ask questions or make suggestions; just keep the suggestions semi-realistic! Toph won't be getting her eyesight back, Sokka will not wear a dress, and Aang cannot bend (or can he, you'll just have to wait and see, muahahahaha).**


	6. Dr Toph has Entered the Building

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed, faved, or added the story to their alerts! You are all super mega radically awesome, and Toph smileth upon thee. Feel free to throw in suggestions or questions or requests in your review! Heck, tell me how much my story sucks, if you want.**

**Oh, and before I forget, Kuei and Azula **_**will**_** be appearing in this story! However, a few things: Kuei's not going to be a king (surprisingly), and he's going to be a lot younger than he is in the series. Oh, and Azula's not going to be completely batshit insane. Or at least, not **_**completely**_**.**

* * *

Day 44

Aang contemplated. And thought. And meditated. And other words that indicate intense concentration at a particular subject. He wasn't sure what to think about the whole... Toph issue. He liked her, of course, but things were just so... different with her! He'd never felt this way with Katara. With Katara, he'd felt confident, happy, and eager to please. He'd felt _safe_. But Toph... He wasn't sure what to feel. He sure didn't feel confident. He still felt happy and eager to please, but he wasn't sure how. She was the most capable, self-assured person he'd ever met. He couldn't do her any favors, because she could do everything she wanted herself. With Katara, he hadn't hesitated to give her flowers or tell her about how he felt. As for Toph...

If he gave her flowers, she'd probably laugh, or punch him for treating her like "a pansy." And he couldn't even _think_ about confessing to her without giving himself a heart attack. What would she say? What would _Zuko_ say? Would he really react violently as Sokka had implied?

"Aang. You are upset. What is troubling you?"

"Oh, hi, Grandpa. I was just thinking."

Gyatso sat beside the confused teenager and patted his shoulder reassuringly.

"At your age, one often experiences moments in which the answers to your questions are shrouded, like a path hidden in a fog. But it is the duty of the elderly to shine a light upon such matters, as to guide one to the truth. Tell me, what were you thinking of?"

"Well, there's this girl..."

"Little one, if I find out that you have fathered a child out of wedlock-"

"_It's not like that! _There's this girl, and I like her, but I don't know what to do. I don't think she likes me back, and... and I'm not sure where to go from here."

"Aah. I see. Why don't you wish to tell her about how you feel?"

"I'm pretty sure she doesn't like me back, and I don't want to ruin our friendship. And I think her reaction would be... Not good."

"I see."

"And she has... She has a... "brother," kind of, and I think he'd kill me."

"Hmm."

"... What do you think I should do?"

"You shall know when the time comes."

"... That... That's not very helpful at all."

"My apologies. But that is the best I can offer you."

"Have you ever... you know. Had the same problem? I mean... With girls?"

"Not really. The ladies loved me, so I didn't exactly have a problem when it came to women. Why, I remember back in the day, when I was much, much younger, my close friend Pathik and I were on a cruise off the coast of Cancun, when these two beautiful girls happened to pass by..."

"... I feel sick. I think I'm going to go lie down."

"Go right ahead, little one. Envy tends to have that affect on people. Especially amongst the younger generation, I've noticed."

Aang decided not to comment and just went to his room instead.

* * *

"Hello?"

"Hello? Katara?"

"Who is this?"

"This is Zuko, I-"

Katara slammed the phone down, hanging up on him. _I swear, when I find out who gave him my home number... _The phone rang again, and she ignored it, glaring at it as though it had personally offended her somehow. _Such a jerk. I hate him. I hate him. I hate him..._ Her resolve began to wear off after the fourth call (how much more persistent and irritating could this guy get). The phone was ringing for the fifth time when she muttered under her breath and picked it up.

"What? Haven't you ever heard of leaving a message?"

"This isn't something where I can just leave a message and expect you to listen."

"Oh really? And yet it's not important enough for you to say it to my face?"

"I _am in college_, Katara. I leave when I'm _free_. I don't sit around all day waiting for one of you to call me and invite me somewhere."

"Well... Well what do you want?"

"I just wanted to say that I apologize for what I said to you the other day. It wasn't fair to you."

"Um, no, it really wasn't fair at all, was it."

"I'm _apologizing_. _I_ don't apologize to _anyone_. What more do you want?"

"I want you to be sorry!"

"What?"

"Anyone can apologize for what they did! That doesn't mean they actually feel sorry about their actions!"

"That doesn't even-"

"This has been a truly enlightening experience, Zuko, but I'm afraid I can't stand hearing your voice anymore. Good day."

She slammed down the phone again, feeling more agitated than satisfied, and sulked. She was sure the dirtbag had told Toph some messed up version of what happened, and now she probably was on his side. Suki and Sokka (bless them) were too busy doing... Well, _whatever_ it was that they were doing (to be quite fair, she wasn't all to sure that she wanted to know). So... She had Aang. As comforting as he could be at times, she wasn't sure if she wanted to approach him about this matter. She sighed and went back to her room to lie down.

He didn't call again.

* * *

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"... Hello?"

"Hi Sokka. It's me."

"Hey Suki! Sorry, my baby sis kept flinching whenever the phone rang, I had to calm her down a bit. Whatsup?"

"Nothing much... Just wanted to talk to you about something."

"Uh, sure! Whatsup?"

"Well..." she wasn't sure how to word the thoughts that were gnawing at the back of her mind. "Err..."

"... Yeah?"

"We... We are dating, right?"

"Um. Yes? I thought we both knew that..."

"Right, right, but... So... You're my boyfriend."

"Uh, I believe so...?"

"I was just wondering... Why do you like me?"

"Huh?"

"I mean, why did you say yes when I first asked you out as a dare? There had to be a reason, right? I mean... I know it's a bit late asking this, considering how many times we've made out whenever Katara wasn't looking, but..."

"Hahaha, yeah, good times..."

"Sokka." Suki frowned, not that he could see it. "Well?"

"Err, well for one thing, you're extremely good looking. Oh, and you're a pretty good kisser."

"... That's it?"

"What?"

"That's the only reason you're going out with me? Because of your _hormones_?"

"Wait, Suki, that's not what I-"

"_Yes_?" she pressed, giving him one more chance to redeem himself.

"You don't have to be self conscious or anything, I mean, you _are_ hot-"

"I think that answered all the questions I've been having. Thank you Sokka." she seethed, her voice so cold it could have formed frost on Sokka's end. "Don't expect to hear from me for a while."

She hung up on him. Sokka stared at the phone incredulously before tossing it onto the sofa. _Women_.

* * *

Toph was having a Fairly Decent Day. Which is one level below Pretty Good Day and a level above Alright Day, but I'm afraid I digress. She was having a Fairly Decent Day, having eaten about seven packages of Oreos (she carefully divided them in half, licked off the filling and ate the cookies separately, a small habit of hers), argued with her parents about something or another, and watched (well, listened to) a fascinating documentary about moles, followed by an equally riveting bit about Asian mythology while painting the parlor table with some paints she'd found while raiding the garage. She received a surprise visit from the Head of Security of her Dad's firm; a tall, ex-wrestler whose real name she didn't know but referred to as The Boulder.

After having an in-depth conversation with The Boulder about his usage of the third person when referring to himself, she had marched down to the kitchens and had demanded a quiche from the chefs (she didn't think of herself as spoiled, but hey, if you're going to be trapped in an ivory prison, you might as well enjoy the perks). After eating the quiche for lunch (and deciding that she didn't like it and that the food channel had lied about its deliciousness), she had some green tea ice cream and bubblegum. Yes, today was a Fairly Decent Day. Or at least, it started out that way. You see, that day was a Saturday, and every Wednesday and Saturday she taught Mantis Kung Fu at Suki's dojo. As per routine, she demurely walked up to a sleeping Daichi (who chauffeured her parents to their rich-people-events), smacked him around the shins with her (useless) stick, and politely asked him to get off his pompous ass and drive her to the usual place before she broke his femurs.

So, she was driven there. Since today was a Fairly Decent Day, she was smiling contently as she walked towards the dojo and waving her walking stick to and fro (causing many people to jump out of the way). She enjoyed the heat of the sun beating down on her face, the smell of the flowers lining the walkway to the dojo's entrance, the sound of the afternoon breeze, and Suki's angry, bloodthirsty screams of rage...

...

...

Wait.

...

Ah, there it was again! It was undoubtedly an angry, bloodthirsty scream of rage, and judging from its pitch and tone (taking into account the general acoustics of the place and the amount of background noise), the source was probably the usually relaxed Suki. Odd. Toph thought it strange that all the calm people (Katara, Suki) were all going batshit insane while she had been somewhat calm. Her train of thought was interrupted by another angry screech from inside, and she felt an odd stirring near the back of her neck. It was cold, prickly, and unpleasant. What was this feeling? Hmm... Oh right! Mortals called it fear. But Toph was Toph. Fear did not exist to her. She would brave Suki's anger and get to the source. After all, she'd made a vow not to lose the only friends she'd made since her parents had decided to stop being such smothering madmen, and she wasn't going back on her words just because Suki sounded like she was cannibalizing a baby.

Toph rolled up her sleeves (figuratively, she was wearing a t-shirt) and threw open the doors. She felt all the students bow and murmur something about "Master Bei Fong," but she ignored them. Suki wasn't in here.

"Where's Suki?" she asked loudly, making sure everyone heard her.

There was more murmuring (she made a mental note to send all these people to speech councilors) before one of them, a tall boy, stepped up and bowed in respect.

"Master Bei Fong, with all due respect, our leader wishes to be alone right now. Perhaps it would be best if you complied with her wishes for now."

"You talk funny. Now where is she? I don't got all day." she demanded impatiently.

"Please, she is quite... irate, due to some event that occurred before the dojo opened. It is my belief that she would calm herself faster if she is left alone to meditate and let out her frustrations. She knew this as well, and that is why she wishes to be undisturbed."

"Stop talking like that." Toph snapped.

"I beg your pardon?"

"Stop. You sound like one of the butlers at my place. But never mind!" she sputtered. "Stop trying to distract me! Tell me where she is or when I'm through with you, the only thing left of your pansy ass will be a crater!"

She felt the intimidation roll off him in waves, and noted the way he shuffled his feet nervously.

"Really, Master Bei Fong, I implore you to allow her to alleviate some of her-"

"AAAAUUUUURRRRGGGGHHHH!" There was Suki again.

The boy froze, and Toph sighed, tapping her feet.

"You know what? Forget this. I'm just going to follow the bloodcurdling screams. Thanks for _all your help_, Butler." She swung her walking stick around the area of his legs and wasn't surprised when he jumped out of the way. She marched on, ignoring the bewildered stares of the students, towards the source of the bone-chilling shrieks.

* * *

Suki was displeased.

And by "displeased," I mean "livid to the point that if a baby koala had come into the room, she would not have hesitated to annihilate it." But luckily for her, Toph was not a baby koala.

"What's going on here, Fangirl? You seem livid. Like... To the point of slaughtering a baby animal."

"Nice to see you too, Toph." Suki didn't turn around and continued to pummel the target before her, abandoning form and stance for reckless punches and kicks.

"Alrighty, is there a reason you sent all those boneheads to spar with one another while you assault the poor punching bag?"

Suki sighed and stopped her attacks, wiping the sweat off her brow.

"It's about Sokka."

Toph had a lightbulb moment and grabbed Suki's hand.

"Wha- What are you doing?"

"Follow me, Fangirl. We're gonna talk about this like rational adults."

She lead her out of the dojo ("Alright, pinheads, keep sparring while we talk about girl things! If any of you put a toe out of line, I'll personally chop it off!" "_Toph_!") and across the street to the small children's memorial park. It was fairly empty, with only two or three children playing around.

"Come on, Fangirl. I remember there being a vending machine around here somewhere."

"It's here. Do you have money?"

"Yup. Here, I'll treat you. What do you want?"

"No, it's fine, I'll pay-"

"Shut up. What do you want?"

"I... guess I'll take the green tea."

"Sounds good. I'll take one too."

They sat side by side on one of the park benches, quietly sipping at their drinks in comfortable silence. Suki sipped her drink again and sighed before finally speaking.

"It's no good."

"Yeah, it's kind of stale-ish. Nothing compared to Pops' tea."

"I meant my relationship with Sokka."

"Oh."

"Well... Okay, you're right about the tea."

"Thank you. Now spill the beans, Fangirl! Dr. Toph is here to listen to your woes." Of course, her experience with such matters was limited, but she'd often heard that a third party is often the wisest when it came to relationship problems.

Suki chuckled a bit before regaining her somber expression.

"I guess... I guess I was having some... doubts. About the authenticity of our relationship. I mean, yeah, we went on a date, yeah we talk to each other a lot, and yes, we kiss. A lot. But I feel like that's it! We're just friends with perks. I don't know if he likes me, or if he just wants me around to make out with whenever he's in the mood."

"Hmm... Well, have you asked him?"

"Yes."

"Oh." Well, she hadn't been expecting _that_. Usually these problems occurred because of a _lack_ of communication. "Well, what did he say?"

"I asked him why he liked me, and his answer was basically 'I'm hot,' and 'I'm a good kisser.'"

"He actually _said_ that?"

"Basically."

"... Really?"

"He tried to explain himself, but I could already tell he was just digging a deeper pit for himself. So I hung up on him."

"I see."

Toph rubbed her chin contemplatively.

"Well, what do you want?" she asked after a few seconds of chin-rubbing.

"Huh?"

"I mean, what do you want? There's a problem, yeah, but what do you want from him?"

Suki thought about it for a moment.

"I want him to like me like I've grown to like him. I don't want to be the convenient girl he keeps around. I want to know if this is a serious thing. If he doesn't really like like me, then I'd rather he ended the relationship than keep using me."

"Do you think he's using you?"

"I don't know. I don't know if he's just really honest or really stupid or really bad at conveying what he actually feels."

Toph pulled out a notepad and pen from her pockets.

"What are you doing?" asked Suki.

"I'm taking notes."

"How are you..."

"I _am_ literate, Fangirl. I press hard enough while I write, I can reread it later."

"Oh..."

Her handwriting was terrible, but she decided not to comment.

* * *

**DR. TOPH'S NOTES:**

**Patient: Suki (a.k.a. Fangirl)**

**Session Notes:**

**Fangirl wants non-floozy boyfriend (Sokka, a.k.a. Snoozles) and a serious relationship**

**Snoozles is either**

**a) stupidly truthful**

**b) stupid**

**c) stupid when it comes to talking about his feelings**

**Treatment:**

**Make sure Fangirl gets her space before she goes batshit insane**

**Get Snoozles' side of the story, help him sort out his shit**

**Have the two talk to each other without Male Stupidity + Female Rage getting in the way**

**Dr. Toph (PhD in Awesome) also prescribes lots of mint chocolate ice cream for the patient.**

**Also, don't get the green tea from park across dojo. It tastes stale and leaves a weird aftertaste.**

* * *

Toph ran a hand through her "notes" to make sure she didn't leave anything out and nodded with satisfaction.

"What did you write?"

"Some notes. Don't worry about it. Now, Fangirl, I am your friend. And as your friend, I refuse to let you continue combusting because of Snoozles, and I also refuse to let you drift apart from the gang because of this. So I will help you."

"Thanks, Toph." Suki said with a smile.

"No problem. I suggest you kinda... get some space. Especially from Snoozles. Keep thinking, but don't dwell on your angriness. Just calmly think things through. Alright?"

"Sure thing, _Therapist_."

"It's nothing, _Lawyergirl_. I also suggest you eat lots of mint chocolate ice cream. You know, to help with the pain."

"Good idea! But I thought mint chocolate ice cream was only for Sleepover Nights."

"Oh. True. Just stick with another flavor, then."

Suki chuckled and patted Toph affectionately on her shoulder.

"Thanks for listening, Toph. It means a lot. I feel a lot less murderous now."

"I've noticed! Just stop scaring the poor kids at the dojo. Well... Except for Butler."

"Who?"

"Never mind."

"Well, we better get back. They must be pretty confused by now."

"Yup! I want to kick some more butts today."

"You mean teach the students, right?"

"That's what I said!"

"Oh, and Toph?"

"Hm?"

"Can you not tell anyone about our little conversation? I'd rather keep things private, or tell them myself."

"My lips are sealed tighter than Old Man Bumi and his stash of rock candy."

"..."

"... That means yes."

"... Oh! Okay, alright. Thanks so much."

"That's what I'm here for."

* * *

After a few hours of injuring people at the dojo, Toph decided that she had time to saunter on over to Sokka's place to talk to him. She walked up to the door and rang the doorbell, and was received by Katara.

"Hey, Toph."

"Hey, Sugar Queen! You alright? You sound... Off."

"Sorry. There's been a lot on my mind. Come on in, I'll get you something to drink."

"Oh no, it's fine." Toph said as she slipped off her sandals and stepped in. The two of them settled on the sofa in the living room (which still had a vague, chocolatey smell) "I've had enough beverages for today."

"Suit yourself. So what's up? Is there a reason for this impromptu visit?"

"Kinda. Where's Snoozles?"

"He's in the shower. He just got in, so it might take a while. But... if it's _really_ serious, I _suppose_ I could go and-"

"_That's quite alright, thank you_." Toph said quickly, cutting her off. "I may not be able to see him, but the idea of being in the same room as a nearly naked Snoozles may cause severe trauma."

"Hehe, alright. So why do you want to talk to my brother?"

"About... stuff."

"Oh."

They fell silent for a bit. Toph could feel the anxiety pouring off of her in waves. She remembered the whole "Katara attacking Zuko" thing and guessed that that was the problem.

"Can I talk to you about something real quick?" Katara asked suddenly, after a few moments of furious internal debates.

"Go for it, Sweetness!"

"It's about Zuko."

Bingo. Toph guess right once again! All hail.

"What about him?"

"Did he... No, I'm sure he told you about what happened, right?"

"You mean about how he provoked you into assaulting him? Yeah. For the record though, I said it was all his fault."

"Really? You did?" She seemed a bit better, but still bothered by something.

"Yeah. He can be... a bit dumb about some things. And you don't lose your temper, ever. Or at least, so I thought. If something got you mad enough to go rawr, it was probably him. Now tell Dr. Toph everything that's bothering you."

Toph tried not to laugh as she pulled out her notepad and pen and looked at her expectantly.

"Toph, what are you..."

"I'm thinking about charging you guys for this. Now tell me what's wrong while I take notes."

"Err... Alright..."

Huh. Well, at least she didn't ask any questions. That'd make the process go quicker. Katara took a deep breath and began to spill.

"I'm just so mad... There's no specific reason why I'm angry, but it's just a bunch of stuff that built up for a while, and I guess I just... took it out on him. Not that he doesn't deserve it! He does deserve it! But I still feel bad, but I don't, and _augh_!"

She threw her hands in the air in defeat.

"This is ridiculous. I don't even know what I'm saying."

"Just start from the beginning, Sugar Queen." Toph said as soothingly as she could manage. It wasn't all that soothing, but hey, she could try.

"Well... I think I began getting really stressed after I lost... After I lost my mother's necklace."

"Your mother's?" She'd never heard her talk about her parents, before.

"Yeah. She's... dead."

"Oh." Toph wanted to smack herself. She'd do it later. "I'm sorry."

"It's fine. Well, I lost my mother's necklace, and after that, everything just seemed to be... _getting_ to me. Finals, my grades, what I was going to do with my life... Then after what I did to Tomo... I couldn't believe it. Was there something wrong with me? Why had I done that? What was going to happen to me?"

"Mmhm..."

"And then after Zuko said all that stuff, about how I should have remembered to stay clear of the elevator and whatnot, it was like a dam broke! I was tired of being responsible for everything, I was tired of all this stress... But instead of collapsing, I just snapped and began... ugh. It didn't even help. I was still upset, I was still mad at him for being a jerk, and I was still freaking out about how violent I was becoming. And even then, I felt bad for hitting him! The whole thing's so stupidly confusing..."

"I see. So... You think all this stress began when you lost your mother's necklace?"

"... No. I think it's when I lost the necklace that I began _noticing_ my stress."

"Hmm..."

Toph wasn't all too sure where to go from that point (some therapist _she_ was). A lot of these things seemed to be beyond her immediate ability to help. Damn.

"So... What do you want?"

"What do you mean?"

"There's a problem, right?"

"Right..."

"Do you see a solution?"

Katara sighed.

"No. I don't see any solution."

"Okay, so no solution. But what do you want for this problem to become? Say there was a solution. A weird, instant solution. What would you want?"

Katara thought for a minute.

"First off, I would want my mom's necklace back. Sokka says I'm 'too hung up over it,' but it's the only reminder of her that I have. It's been with me for as long as I remember."

"Uh huh."

"I would want all my uncertainties to go away. I want to have a firm footing on my life. I want to be responsible without being overwhelmed. I want Tomo to drop off the face of the earth without any consequences on my part."

"I agree."

"And... I guess I want Zuko to be legitimately sorry for what he did. I don't want to be angry anymore, but I don't want to forgive him immediately, either. At the same time, I want to be able to forgive him, and apologize for hurting him. Does that even make sense?"

"Of course!" Well, not really, but there were times to be truthful and times to fib, and this was one of those times.

"Thanks for listening, Toph."

"No problem, Sugar Queen. Anything for my people. I'm not showing you the notes, though."

"Fine. Can you promise not to tell anyone about... you know? This talk?"

"Sure! I vow that I'll remain silent."

"Thanks."

* * *

**DR. TOPH'S NOTES:**

**Patient: Katara (a.k.a. Sugar Queen, Sweetness)**

**Session Notes:**

**Sweetness suffers from Super Stress (unrelated to her monthly cycle)**

**- Lost her mom's jewelry, misses it**

**- Worried about life in general**

**- Worried about what'll happen to her once Dickface Tomo squeals to his parents (that pussy)**

**- Mad at Sparky, yet doesn't want to be mad (? Try not to question)**

**- More worrying and anger and other stressful... Stuff**

**- This is a long list. Way longer than Fangirl's.**

**Treatment:**

**Get Sugar Queen to relax her sweet ass or else she's going to spontaneously combust from the stress and tension.**

**Talk to Sparky about his ginormous ego without him consuming you.**

**Kill Tomo?**

**Dr. Toph (PhD in Epicness) prescribes a lot of calming teas, a day at the spa or beach, a good massage, or some other way to alleviate stress. Would patient agree to using sex as an outlet?**

**Fangirl has often commented on her alarming lack of libido. Further observation is necessary.**

* * *

Toph turned to Katara.

"Alrighty, Sweetness. You suffer from Super Stress. Are you on your period?"

"What? No!"

"I thought so. Now, I suggest that you do some more calming activities."

"... Such as...?"

"You know! Drink some tea. Go to the spa. Get a massage."

"Hmm..." she seemed to be taking this into consideration.

"Maybe let out some of your frustration in a more enjoyable way?"

"What do you mean?"

"You know. Some horizontal tango? Bedroom wrestling? Between-the-sheets fun-"

Katara threw a cushion at her.

"_Toph! No, I will not be using sex as an outlet_!" she exclaimed loudly, although she couldn't help but laugh at how ridiculously open Toph was. The other girl smiled; she could hear the grin on her face. At least she wasn't so distraught anymore.

"Why not? Fangirl says you're way too conservative for your own good! Maybe this is a result of your pent-up frustrations?"

"What? Suki is about as 'experienced' as we are!"

"Yeah, but she has a healthy interest in the opposite sex. You on the other hand..."

"Oh really? What about _you_? I've never exactly heard you express interest in guys."

"Of course not! Men are idiots. Girls for the win!"

"Are you implying that you're... 'open to different possibilities,' so to speak?"

"What? No! Not that there's anything wrong with that, but I for one am closed to _all_ possibilities. Romance is gross. Are _you_ open to different possibilities?"

"Despite the fact that I don't lust after random guys, no, I am not open to different possibilities. Why, did you guys think I was?"

"What on earth are you guys talking about?" Sokka interjected, having returned from the shower.

"AAUGH! MY EYES!" Toph screamed. She covered her eyes and began writhing on the sofa in pain.

"What's with you? I'm wearing-" he stopped. "Oh. Hahaha. Ha. Haha. You're hilarious. A regular comedian."

"Thanks." she said, straightening up as though nothing had happened. "You're pretty funny yourself."

"What were you guys talking about? I heard something about my baby sister and lesbians."

Katara groaned and slapped her forehead while Toph cackled.

"Oh man..." Toph sighed, once her giggles subsided. "That reminds me, I gotta talk to you sometime, Snoozles. In private."

Katara looked puzzled and turned to Sokka.

"What is she talking about?"

"I dunno."

"Really? You're not keeping something from..." Katara fell silent while Toph looked on in confusion. She could tell Snoozles didn't have any idea what was happening either.

"Uh... Katara? What's the deal?"

"You... You..."

"What?"

"You _have a piercing? On your eyebrow?_"

"Oh shit, I forgot, you didn't-"

"_And what? Is- Is that a stud on your ear? You hypocrite! You didn't even tell me, and __**all these years you wouldn't even let me**_-"

Toph decided that that was her cue to hightail it out of here. Her chat with Sokka could wait.

"I'm going to go, guys! It was nice talking with you two! See ya later!"

She swept out the door while Sokka yelled something about "don't leave me here" and "traitor." She sighed contentedly and walked towards the driveway, where Daichi was probably sleeping in the car. _Ahh, how she relished conflict_.

* * *

Wondering what some of the other characters were doing during this little bit? Well...

* * *

Haru and Jet played Call of Duty at Haru's house. It was an intense game.

...

...

Yeah.

...

...

That's... That's pretty much it. Sorry. Maybe next time they'll be doing something more interesting?

Until then!


	7. I'm Not Drunk You're Drunk

**Here's another chapter of this multi-chapter story. Obvious statement is obvious (I love tautology).**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed! I love you all, regardless of your opinions! And for everyone who reads this without reviewing... Stop it. Toph frowneth upon thee. To those who DO review (Toph smileth upon thine visage), don't forget that you can always make (reasonable) requests/suggestions (hopefully I won't be overwhelmed) and ask as many questions as you wish! I apologize for not directly responding to reviews, I am lazy fuck and socially awkward. Feel free to E-Punch me in the gut/face. I deserve it.**

**Quick favor, however- I would really appreciate if you guys could tell me who your favorite character is and why, which chapter you liked the most and why, and some constructive criticism, please! Concrit does not mean "0MFG, U LYK T44NG 0NLY CUZ U W4NT ZUT4R4, U B1TCH"or "WTF, N0 0ZAI? U 5UK B4LLZ" Those are not reviews, those belong on sites where arrogant people regularly war with one another by saying the most vile, evil things anyone could ever direct at another human being. Sites like Youtube.**

**Let's begin.**

* * *

[flashback]

"_After the harrowing game that concluded the warm summer season, Wilfred and Rupert wiped the sweat off their brow in contentment. Football was a man's sport, and having won, they were now to be revered by the lower classes once school started. Life was good, and they decided to celebrate by indulging in their favorites- a couple of bottles of Cokes for twenty-five cents each at the General Store down by-_"

"Wait, wait, wait, _what_? What the hell is that? The bottle was _a quarter_ each? That's fucked up!"

Zuko sighed and put the book down, having been interrupted for the third time in the past ten minutes.

"Things were a lot cheaper back then, Champ." he said somewhat wearily.

"That's sick, messed up, and awesome. Why don't they just buy all the Coke there?" Toph exclaimed, popping a salted peanut into her mouth in indignation (and _nothing_ screams displeasure more than salted nuts).

"Err, let me rephrase that. It's not just that things were cheaper, but the value of money was a lot higher." he patiently explained, reaching over and grabbing a salted peanut for himself.

"Oh. Which explains why you need more dough if you want to buy a Coke now a days?"

"Yeah."

"Damn it. That sucks. I shoulda been born earlier. Okay, sorry, continue."

Zuko cleared his throat and began again.

"_-the General Store down by Old Man Riley's rickety shack. Rupert and Wilfred crossed-_"

"Uh, Sparky?"

The book went back down. By now, Toph's interruptions weren't so much "annoying" as it was something he'd grown to expect to occur every five to fifteen minutes.

"Yeah, Champ?"

"Okay, so... I didn't mention this since the beginning of the book..."

They were on the twentieth page in a book that was about 220 pages long. It had been two hours.

"... But could you do me a favor?"

"What's up?"

"So... I'm really bothered by their names."

"Hmm? What do you mean?"

"I mean... Like... Just the _sound_ of them. _Rupert_ and _Wilfred_. I feel my heart break everytime you read that aloud, man. Don't they feel ashamed of their names? What were their parents thinking? Why don't they give themselves nicknames? I dunno about Rupert, but the other guy could call himself Will or something, right?"

"I... I suppose..."

"Granted, it's not like we have the most normal names either, but it's better than- than _Rupert_ and _Wilfred_. Those are so horrible, it feels like a papercut. It makes me wince in pain."

"Well... Things were different back then..."

"Nuh uh! Remember that book from last week? The, uh, wait... Oh right, the one with the rich bitch and that badass mafia dude?"

"You mean _Sunrises_?"

"Yeah! That took place before cars were invented. Like, back when girls weren't allowed to show their ankles or some stupid crap like that. And they had normalish names!"

"It's different. That one was written in a more modern time. This one is from the 1900's."

"That's no excuse."

Zuko groaned while Toph continued her tirade against "names that caused her physical agony."

[End]

* * *

The flashback you just read about was ended when Toph heard her phone ring (a recording of her screaming "PICK UP THE PHONE, HARLOT"). She scrambled off of her bed, shaking her head to clear her mind. Having a lot of flashbacks tended to slow down her thought process. She had to learn to stop having them.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Toph. It's me." Sokka's voice answered her from the other end.

"Snoozles! Hey, I just remembered that I had to talk to you! What's up?"

"Err... Well, it's about Suki."

Toph took a few seconds to smirk at the irony before returning to the phone.

"Yeah? What about her?"

"She's mad at me and I need your help to get back on her good side."

"Oh, you little maggot." she said affectionately, deciding to play dumb for now. "Why is she pissed at you?"

"I don't even know! She just started asking me weird questions, like why I'm dating her, and now she won't even answer the phone!"

Toph frowned at his answers and pressed further.

"Well, what did you say to her?"

"That she was hot, and good at kissing-"

"You dumbass! Why would you say that?"

"I thought she was insecure about her looks or something! I wanted to tell her what she wanted to hear. And it's true! She _is_ pretty, and-"

"Shut up, Snoozles. I'm going to give you some advice, and you had better listen good, you hear me?"

Sokka gave a nervous "Mmhm," a bit worried at the girl's tone.

"Now, I dunno why the hell she decided to ask you this stuff all of a sudden, nor do I know what made her question you two. However, I do know that she was looking for a reason other than her looks. You might have thought you were making her feel good about herself, but judging from your answers, I can guarantee you that she probably thinks you're just another horny teenager who's trying to get into your pants."

Alright, _slight_ exaggeration here, but what's wrong with a bit of theatrics here and there?

"B-but, but I'm not!" he sputtered, and Toph was pleased to hear the horror in his voice. "I mean, I like her! I really do! I thought she- She didn't say-"

"I'm not finished. She probably wanted you to say something about her personality, like how nice she is, or how funny she is. Or she might have wanted you to say something about her abilities. Like... How smart she is, or how good she is at kicking your ass around."

"I know what you mean, and I agree. What am I going to do now? I _do_ like her."

"So tell her! Not exactly rocket science here."

"I can't do that!"

"Oh? Why not?"

"I... I just can't! She won't pick up the phone!"

"So go to her house."

"She won't see me!"

"Excuses, excuses, Snoozles. You and I both know that there's only one thing keeping you from making things right is you. So literally, get over yourself, sprint to her place, and grovel like a madman."

"But I-"

"You wanted my award-winning advice, and I gave it to you. Now if you'll excuse me, it's a perfectly good Saturday, and no offense, I have better things to do. Good day."

She promptly hung up on him and went downstairs. It was nothing short of astounding how willing people were to talk about their problems with anyone. Or at least, anyone _but_ the one person you _should_ talk to in order to solve said problem. She shook her head at the general foolishness of man and decided to go and harass Daichi for a while.

* * *

A few hours later, Toph sat on the tire swing in her backyard, soaking up the heat of the slowly setting sun. After bothering the ever-stoic chauffeur, she had waltzed off to the kitchens where she had managed to sneak out a few apples and a bottle of something she couldn't identify- it was sort of sweet, yet mostly bitter with a burning feeling when it traveled down her throat, and she decided that she liked it immensely. She would make sure to ask the head chef about it later. For now, she would eat, relax, and wait for her parents to overreact and panic once they realized she wasn't in her room, sending all their servants everywhere in a search party after her.

She munched on an apple and sighed contentedly. Yup. Today was a Fairly Decent day. She grabbed her walking stick and pushed against the ground, causing the tire swing to rock back and forth gently. Toph closed her eyes and began to doze off lightly, but was rudely interrupted when the phone rang. With a growl and another swig of the odd liquid, she answered the call.

"Hello?"

"Champ, it's me."

"Sparky, you'd better have a good ex... excuse for interrupting my qui... Quiet time."

Weird. It was hard for her to form words, and her tongue felt different. She must have been _really_ tired. Zuko seemed to notice this too.

"You alright? Should I call back later?"

"Wha? No, no, no, I'm ffffiine. Yeah, that's it. Fine. What is up. What is... What is the dealio."

Another sip. She was getting kind of hot. And she felt... _off_.

"... Maybe this _is_ a bad time. How about I call you some other time..."

"No! You already messed up my sleepy times. You hang up, and I swear, I'mma... I'mma get you."

Sleepy times? Man, she _was_ tired. Yeah, that had to be it.

"... Riiight..." he said slowly, regretting having ever called. "I just wanted you to do me a favor."

"Toph Bei Fong at yer service! Whaddya need, Sparky?"

"Well, you know how I... kind of got in a fight with Katara?"

"Sugarness? Or what was it... Whatever. Yeah, her?"

"Well, I called her and I apologized, and she wouldn't forgive me."

"Really? That is highly unusual... You musta reeeeally pissed 'er off." Toph took a large bite out of her apple and washed it down with another drink.

"Well, now what am I supposed to do, Champ?"

"Why... Why does everyone ask the wrong peoples?" Toph slurred lightly, gesticulating with her hand (forgetting that he couldn't see her). "I mean, they ask fer advice and shit, but they don't talk to the one person that- that actually matters."

"Are... Are you drunk?"

"I mean, yeah, I know it must be *hic* hard n' all, cuz u don' wanna discuss things with the person you fought with, but geez, if you want yer problems solved, you gots to grow a set and... and yeah, confront her."

"Where are you? Why are you drinking? Is someone with you?"

"But you know what I'm talkin' about, Sparky? Do you feel which way I be flowin'?"

"Answer me, Toph, I'm serious!"

"You said Toph! Not Champ! You _are_ serious. I will answer your questionses. I be at my house. I be with me, myself, and Toph. And I'm not drunk! I'm just feelin' gooood. _You're_ drunk." Toph giggled... drunkenly.

Zuko was relieved that she wasn't out drinking with anyone shady, but was still reasonably alarmed.

"You are drunk, Toph." he said firmly, making sure every word got to her through her alcohol-induced haze. "Why."

"I dunno what yer talkin' about, Zuko. I _am_ drinking something, but it don't taste like alcohol."

"Do you know what alcohol tastes like?"

"No." Toph giggled again. "I guess I do now!"

Zuko slapped his forehead.

Also, Ransta does not support underage drinking, nor does the cast of AtLA.

Zuko slapped his forehead. What went on through this kid's mind would forever be a mystery to him.

"Should I come over, Toph?"

"Naw, man, is cool. I'm fine. Dandy. Don't need yer help."

_Okay,_ she thought, _maybe I __**am**__ drunk. Just a little, though. I don't know for sure what I'm saying, but at least I can walk properly. I don't need help walking out of the __**backyard**__!_

She gingerly placed a toe on the grass below her and was pleased to find that she could still "see" pretty well. She celebrated with another drink.

"Yup! I checked it, bro. I can not need help." she reaffirmed with him.

"I can't believe this! How did you even _get_ the alcohol! What were you thinking? This kind of reckless behavior-"

"I'm not reckless. _Yer_ reckless." Toph hiccuped and continued. "Didn' you wanna advice 'bout what to do with Sweet... Queen?"

"Toph, I don't think that's the problem here-"

"Hokay, so, Sugarness doesn't normally get pissed off so often, but from what I has been able to notice, she has this thingamajig for holdin' a grudge."

"Err-"

"Shaddup and lemme talk. So, like, I dunno why she does it. But... But she does. Personally, I thinks it's cuz of how she always, like, trusts people. You know what I mean?"

"Wha-"

"Yeah, so, since she always be trustin' people so easy, like some kind of... Trust floozy," Toph giggled, "She feels betrayed when people she trusts start being dicks. Kinda like you did!"

"I didn't-"

"But I'm speculatin' here, so don't quote me. Oh, and don't tell her about the trust floozy thing. So, she be pissed at you. And she probably will stay pissed at you until you really, really, really, really, really, really prove her wrong. Know what I means?"

"I get what you mean, but I think you should-"

"Even... Even if she don't wanna see yer face, you gots ta make her see it. Like, make sure she has no choice *hic* but to acknowledge that you really are sorry, and that... And that you've done all you ever possibly ever ever could. Then she'll prob'ly realize that she's the only person left that's keepin' her mad, not you. Know what I'm sayin'?"

"O-okay, but I really, really think you should go-"

"This was a nice talk, Sparkster! Heed my advices. The Toph has spoken!"

"Wait! Toph! You can't-"

It took her a while to hang up on him, as her hands wouldn't cooperate, but she eventually did (with Zuko protesting every second). She tipped her head back and tried to drink out of the bottle again, but found (much to her disappointment) it to be empty. With a groan, she reclined on the tire-swing (similar to how you and I would sit on an inner tube) and dozed off. She'd go to her bedroom later.

* * *

That was how a frantic maid found her half an hour later; snoring loudly on the tire swing and clutching a large, empty bottle of 24 year old Sauvignon amontillado (a dry sherry so strong it causes grown men's eyes to water). The ground around her was littered with apple cores, and she was carried (with difficulty) back to her room with the help of a few reluctant housekeepers. It was a long and arduous process, as she had a tendency to groan and wiggle away from any sort of contact, making lifting her near impossible. She, however, was able to somehow stay asleep throughout this entire process, catching only a few phrases such as "Hold still... Won't stop flinching..." "What will we tell them... To her room?" "An _entire_ bottle of amontillado... Amazing how she's still..." "Where did she even..." "Chef... to kill us..." "Why won't she let go of the bottle?" "... Just keep... for now..."

But Toph ignored them all, too busy dreaming.

* * *

She dreamt that she was in a stadium, surrounded by thousands of screaming fans. Why they were screaming her name she wasn't all too sure, but hell if she wasn't enjoying herself. She raised her fists in the air, grinning like mad, while the crowd continued to roar. Suddenly she was holding a heavy belt, like one of the big wrestling ones The Boulder had brought her once. He'd said he was the champion of some wrestling tournament, impressing her. She was momentarily caught off guard when the thing had materialized in her hands, but she was able to hoist it over her head with pride. More fanatic shouts from the adoring crowd, cheering her on for her great victory (although just what exactly she was victorious over was unknown to her). Man, this was awesome.

Suddenly the belt was gone; It hadn't suddenly disappeared, it was snatched from her hands by someone.

"Hey! What the hell!" she exclaimed angrily, unable to feel any sort of presence anywhere in the arena. Wait... No, there was one more person here, a guy, just a few feet away. How come she hadn't been able to see him earlier?

"Give that back, you good for nothing-!" she tried to tackle him and was shocked when he disappeared. No, not disappeared, he'd jumped over her! He must have jumped pretty high, too, because he landed about thirty feet away from her.

"You can't do that, you cheating, dirty..." She stomped the ground in frustration and was pleased (yet not surprised) when the earth beneath him opened up into a gaping hole. The mystery boy fell in, and almost immediately the ground around him closed up, trapping him up to his neck.

Toph laughed loudly.

"How do you like that, Twinkletoes? No one steals my Champion Belt! No one!"

* * *

Toph abruptly woke up when her phone rang again; she had woken up before her fist had made contact with that mystery guy's stupid face. Damn it. She always woke up before the best part. She wasn't sure what time it was (but it had to be late), and her head felt like someone had screwed open her head, taken out her brain, and stomped on it for a few hours before putting it back in. She vaguely realized the phone was still ringing (she winced at the sound) and made a grab for it.

"Hello?" she groaned. She realized she was still holding the empty bottle. She set it down for now, opting to rub her scalp in a vain attempt to dispel the throbbing.

"Hello? Toph? It's me, Aang. Did I wake you up?"

Was his voice always this loud?

"What... What time is it?" More scalp-rubbing.

"Ten thirty, I'm sorry, I thought you'd be awake..."

"Oh, I'm fine. Geez my head... What's up, Twinkie?"

"Are you alright? You sound... Pained."

"I feel like I jumped off the Empire State Building and landed on my goddamn head, but continue."

"Err... Should I call back some other-"

"No. You already woke me up, Twinkles. Just talk softer while I nurse my first hangover."

"Okay, well, I wanted to- _Wait, what_."

Whoops. She hadn't exactly meant to tell him. She was going to brag about it to Zuko or something. Someone a bit more... understanding of her achievement.

"Well, I just had my first alcoholic drink." She said somewhat smugly.

"What? Why? Where? How could you?"

"Relax, Twinkletoes! I know it's not something to be proud of, especially since it's sorta illegal, but damn if I don't feel pretty freaking manly right now." There was a pause. "Alright, so I feel more pained than manly. But come on, a drink is a rite of passage!"

"That's not what _I_ was taught!"

"Okay, so maybe hanging out with The Boulder and Sparky for the better part of my life didn't exactly get me a pure childhood. That doesn't stop me from feeling all grown up. Besides, I haven't barfed, streaked, or had sex with a stranger, so I'm pretty sure I didn't get _too_ drunk. I remember having a decent conversation with Sparky, even!"

"Please tell me you drank something light. Watered down rice wine, maybe. Do you still have the bottle? Read it!"

"Hmm." Toph mockingly examined the label on the empty bottle, even though he couldn't see her. "Funny enough, Twinkletoes, I can't tell!"

"Oh. Right. Sorry. I keep forgetting-"

"Yeah, yeah, I know. It's good for a laugh, though. There _is_ a gigantic 24 embossed on it, so I'm guessing that's the age."

"Oh God, Toph, what if you become an alcoholic or something?"

"Relax! I'm not, so chill your face. Stop screaming. Now, why did you call?"

"I just wanted to ask if you... Well... If you wanted to... Sometime... Like, when you're free... I mean, you don't have to, but..."

"Spit it out, Twinkletoes!" Toph said amiably. Unfortunately, this didn't help, and only managed to make Aang lose his resolve.

"I wanted to know if you... Could tell me what the English homework was?" he sighed. Second attempt at asking her out: Fail.

"What English homework? Mrs. Tan had to have an emergency lobotomy, remember? They sent all her classes to study halls while they took her to the ambulance?"

Attempt at creating excuse for calling her: Epic fail.

"Hahahaha!" Aang laughed loudly and unconvincingly. "I forgot! Hahaha! Silly me!"

"I'm starting to wonder if I'm the only one who consumed alcohol around here, Twinkletoes. You alright? You seem bothered, to put it lightly."

"You have no idea." Aang muttered.

"Well, lucky for you, I just spent the day listening to the never-ending woes of other people. I can handle one more! Don't worry, I won't charge... This time. Although I totally should, I'd be rich. Well, richer, anyway. Sorry, I got a bit distracted there. What's getting to you?"

"Err... Well..." It couldn't hurt to "tell" her. In fact, maybe she'd find out he was talking about her! Then, in a way, he will have been able to tell her what he'd been wanting to say for a while.

"There's this girl," Aang began slowly, trying to keep his voice casual. "She... She's something else. She's tough and really strong, and at the same time, she's really pretty (although she doesn't know it), and smart, and funny, and a good friend. I... I..."

"You like her?" Toph asked. Aang gulped.

"Y-yeah. And... I'm hoping... I really want her to like me back... But I'm not sure. And if I tell her I like her, I might end up ruining our friendship. And... I never want that to happen."

Toph was caught in between intense sympathy and choking back comments on how cheesy he sounded. Instead she said,

"That's pretty deep. Now, I'm not too good at this kind of stuff, but I... I think I know who you're talking about."

"You do?" Both hope and anxiety flooded the boy.

She thought carefully about what he'd told her. Tough, strong, intelligent, and good-looking (but doesn't know it). Funny, and a cherished friend. And if he tells her he likes her, he might ruin their friendship. He won't say her name, so obviously it's someone she knows well.

Toph was no fool.

Aang liked Katara!

She wasn't surprised; he was a sweet, somewhat feminine guy, and a girl like Katara would easily get his attention! She would support her friends one hundred percent, although if their relationship got in the way of their friendship, she'd have to do something... severe.

"I think... I think I do. And the only way you can find out whether she likes you back is to ask her in person." Toph said wisely.

Aang was a bit confused. Was she referring to herself, or did she really think there was another girl? Her next few words answered his question.

"But don't worry, Loverboy! I will assist you in your noble quest. I will dig around a bit, find out what I can. And if she likes you back, I'll be sure to let you know! Then you won't have to worry about the possibility of rejection."

"Uh, but-"

"Don't worry, I'm pretty good at lying. I'll be like... a double agent!"

Aang groaned (away from the phone, so that she couldn't hear) and smacked his forehead. She thought there was another girl! She was going to investigate this imaginary girl! Why did these things always happen to him?

"Thanks Toph. You have no idea how much this means to me." he said. No, she really didn't know what this meant to him. She didn't even sound the littlest bit jealous! In a way, he'd gotten the answer he'd been waiting for. At least he didn't have to give anything away about his feelings. Now he knew enough to keep quiet and cherish the friendship he had.

Somehow, that didn't make him feel better. At all.

"No problem, Twinkletoes. I'm very good at this advice... type... stuff. You'd be surprised how many people are willing to blurt their life stories at the first person to listen. Not that I mind, of course. Feel free to blurt life stories whenever you want."

Aang rolled his eyes but smiled. Things weren't going to change between them, after all.

* * *

"_The niiiight is yoooung and yoooou're so glamorous,_" sang Jet loudly as he crashed into the dorm room. "_Pardon if I seeem over-amorous, Laaaaaadyyyyyy~_"

"Jesus, Jet, are you drunk too?" griped Zuko as he closed his books. No point in studying anymore, now that Jet was here. No matter what he did, the guy would always find a way to distract him.

"Drunk too? What are you talking about?" Jet threw his backpack on his bed but collapsed on Zuko's instead. It was a bad habit of his, but he claimed that Zuko's bed was warmer. "I'm sober, Hothead. I'm just feeling reeeeally good."

"Yeah, that's exactly what my drunk friend happened to say. Why are you so... happy?"

"No reason." Jet said, with a smirk that indicated otherwise. "Met a girl at the bookstore."

"Never mind, on second thought, I don't want to know."

"Heeeyy!" Jet complained, sitting up quickly. "You're the one who asked!"

"You'd have told me anyway."

"Oh. Touché. Well, I met this chick at the bookstore, right? Well, actually, no, first off, I was at Starbucks, you know? And I was ordering coffee, because, you know, I was at a coffee shop, and I was tryin' to get my wallet, right, and-"

"Will you hurry up and get to the point?"

"Sheesh, alright! You're in a grumpier mood than usual. So, I have to buy a new guide, cuz I spilled coffee on it, so I head over to the bookstore across the street. That's where I met this hot, goth-type chick behind the counter! I tried to get her number and talk her up, right? And she's all, 'If you continue to harass me, I'll report you to my manager,' and so I'm all 'Chill, I'm not harassing you,' but she wouldn't listen." Jet took a deep breath; he'd been talking pretty quickly, you see.

"So she turned you down. That's not that amazing." Zuko chuckled.

"Pft. Whatever, man. I'm thinking about visiting her again. She can't last long." Jet reclined on Zuko's bed with his hands behind his head. "Even if she _did_ threaten to cut my balls off."

"Seriously? Damn, I want to meet this girl. Sounds like someone I could get along with."

"Meh, she seems like your type. Dark, kinda goth, although she doesn't really dress like one, and she doesn't smile much, although that may have been because of me."

"What was her name?" Zuko asked without really paying attention, pulling out notebooks from the drawers. The more questions he asked, the faster Jet would lose interest in the conversation and go to sleep.

"What was it... Oh yeah, it was on her nametag! Her name was Mai."

Zuko dropped his things.

"_What_?" He almost yelled, hoarsely.

"Her name was Mai..." Jet repeated slowly, now looking a bit alarmed. "You know her?"

"Uh, no." His answer was much too quick to be even remotely believable.

"Dude, you know her. What's with you? Is she an ex or something? Your cousin? A friend?"

"Drop it."

"No! You know her, and when I said her name you went all weird. What's with you? Who is she?"

"I said drop it!"

"Tell me! Or I'll just ask her!"

"Shut up!"

"Dude, _what_ is your fucking problem?"

"You mention me to her, or her to me ever again, I swear to God, _I will kill you_."

Jet didn't speak, but he glowered at his roommate before walking to his own bed.

"I'm gonna go to sleep, asshole. Don't keep the light on for too long."

Zuko didn't reply.

* * *

"... And that's pretty much why I needed someone else to write for me for two months or so."

"Wow, Twinkletoes! You _have_ to show me sometime. My respect for you has been increased by 40%."

They were still on the phone, and Aang had just told her about one of his hobbies: parkour (or freerun). Toph hadn't known what it was, but had been quite impressed after he'd explained it for her. For those of you playing at home, if you don't know what that is, Youtube it!

"40%? How much respect would that be in total?"

"I would say... Seventy-four."

"Seventy four? Out of...?"

"A possible ninety."

"That's it? And why ninety?"

"Why not?"

They both erupted into laughter. Not that it was funny in the slightest, but they'd been on the phone for four hours (Toph's hangover dissipated sometime around midnight), and _everything_ is hilarious at two thirty in the morning.

"Oh man..." Toph groaned after her laughter had subsided. "That wasn't even remotely funny..."

"Didn't you know? _Everything_ is hilarious at two thirty in the morning!" Aang exclaimed. "It's a scientific law!"

"Pft, listen to yourself, you nerd, acting as if you know all about scientific laws." Toph said, grinning. Their conversations were making no sense, and there were so many digressions that she could barely keep track of what they were talking about. She loved it.

"Of course! I'm a master of scientific laws. You said so yourself, I'm a nerd." Aang said, puffing out his chest proudly (forgetting that she couldn't see him, regardless).

"Oh yeah? Name another one other than the Two-Thirty Hilarity one."

"Alright! Did you know that when you wear sandals, there's a 60% increased chance that someone will step on your feet or shoes?"

"I don't know which is worse, the fact that I believe you, or the fact that you even memorized that in the first place."

"Memorized?" He exclaimed, mock-offended. "That was all improv!"

"An geek, an athlete, _and_ an actor? Be still my heart!"

They both laughed again (although Aang could feel his cheeks warm a bit). Their laughter turned into giggles, before a tired, happy silence was all that remained. Toph was sleepy as hell, and her jaw hurt from grinning so much, and she didn't ever want to hang up.

"Twinkletoes?"

"Yeah, Toph?"

"... You know what'd be awesome?"

"What?"

"If we had a tent."

Aang paused, letting it sink in.

"I think I heard you wrong," he said finally. "Did you say a _tent_?"

"Yeah! I mean, remember how we were talking about camping with our friends?"

"Uh huh."

"We might not exactly be able to go to the Rockies and stuff, but what's wrong with hanging out in a tent? Do you know what we should do? We should get a bigass tent, set it up in my bigass backyard, and we should just sleep there."

"That actually doesn't sound too bad..."

"Think about it! No stuffy parents breathing down our throats, no stupid school. Just us and our friends and our tent. You guys could look at the stars and constellations, and you could tell me about what you see, and their stories."

"I don't know any constellations-"

"Shut up and listen, Twinkletoes, I'm trying to be thoughtful. We could make a fire in that patch of dirt in the backyard, and we could tell scary stories to each other and freak everyone out. We could play games, and tell each other about our problems without using only me as an outlet. Wouldn't it be fun?"

"Yeah... I think it'd be a lot of fun. I don't like the thing about the stars, though. It's not fair if we all look at everything and just tell you about it."

Toph was silent for a bit.

"I could see it, if you guys described it enough. And besides, I have other ways of entertaining myself. I'd be happy knowing you guys were with me. I'd be happy listening to your voices. I could enjoy the cooler breezes at night. I could feel the heat of the fire." her voice was getting softer, and she began speaking slower. "I could hear the cars in the distance. I could feel the grass grow under my feet. Sometimes I feel like I could feel the whole earth shifting beneath me, like it's alive."

This had to be the most poetic he'd ever heard Toph speak. He didn't say anything, not wanting her to stop.

"Sometimes I go outside, and I just stand barefoot for a while. When I feel the plants... and the vibrations from different sources... It's like I'm feeling life from underneath me... You know how that feels?" she stifled a yawn and struggled to keep her eyes open, not wanting to fall asleep.

"I think I do," Aang said softly. "But now's not the best time to explain. Go to sleep, Toph, I can tell you're tired."

Well, so was he, but that didn't matter at the moment.

"No way, Twinkletoes. I'm totally aw... awake." She yawned at the end, unable to hold it back.

"No you're not... Go to sleep, Toph, we can talk tomorrow. Or... Today."

"Promise?" Her eyelids began to droop. Stupid, disobedient eyelids.

"Promise."

"Good-" Another yawn, "Good night, Twi- Aang."

"... Good night, Toph."

* * *

_Suki floated through the hallways, invisible and unheard. She was in an enormous palace of some sort- an old fashioned building that reminded her of those palaces owned by emperors in ancient China. Everything was red with decorations in solid gold, and servants were running around everywhere. But where she was didn't matter, nor was the fact that she was but a ghost in this place. All that mattered was that she had to find something. She wasn't sure what. She "walked" through a hallway that was completely empty and passed an open garden. She stopped, turned, and went back. The garden itself was beautiful, with an enormous willow overlooking a crystalline lake with a group of ducks (were those turtleshells on their backs?) swimming around. There were multiple flowers growing everywhere, their colors bright and appealing to the eye. But that's not what caught her attention._

_Zuko and Katara were talking to one another. He was wearing sweeping, heavy, crimson robes, with his hair tied back and held up by what appeared to be a golden crown. She was wearing a simple, light dress in a nice blue shade, her hair cascading down her back. Suki couldn't tell wha they were saying, and went closer to listen._

_"... Wouldn't stop eating the pies! But then again, that's Aang for you." Katara exclaimed, rolling her eyes. The two of them chuckled softly. "And how is Mai?"_

_"She's fine. She's having a lot of fun scaring the officials who were affiliated with Azula. She's an excellent Fire Lady." The pride in his voice was unmistakable._

_"I think so, too! The Fire Nation is doing great under you two. Without you, we never could have reached the peace we're enjoying today."_

_He scoffed at this._

_"Please. If it weren't for Aang, I'd probably be dead, or waging war just like Ozai. Give me another year, and I'll make sure there's a national holiday celebrating the your wedding."_

_Suki stopped listening sometime around here. Yes, she was in some kind of mystical, ancient past. Yes, she was some kind of ghost. But things still didn't seem very serious to her at the moment, and Suki was still Suki. She grinned mischievously and crept closer and closer, forgetting that it didn't matter since no one could see or hear her. She brought her hands to Katara's back and shoved her as hard as she could towards Zuko._

_She squealed in surprise and brought her hands up to break her sudden fall, but was caught when Zuko quickly wrapped his arms around her back. Her hands and face were against his chest, and her eyes widened when she realized how close they were. Suki had expected laughter, or fear towards this invisible prankster. She hadn't expected this suddenly tense, charged atmosphere._

_"Careful, there are a lot of stray rocks around here." Zuko said quietly, his voice low and husky._

_Suki began to wonder if she had made a slight mistake. They had yet to let go of each other._

_"Um. Yeah." Katara stammered. Her hands curled slowly, gathering a fistful of the thick robes he was wearing. It didn't look like she was going to let go._

_"Katara." he said after a while._

_She didn't respond, opting instead to chew her lip and look at her hands. He repeated her name, and she slowly, slowly looked up and met his eyes._

_They stared at each other a bit before quickly pulling away with hastily concocted excuses and leaving, going their separate ways. Soon, Suki stood in the wide, sunny garden alone, shocked and blushing._

_The look they'd exchanged was far too personal, too intimate to be between friends. It had said too much, revealed too big a part of themselves to be simply platonic. His eyes had been passionate, smoldering, while hers was longing and tender._

_Suki felt dirty, like some kind of sick voyeur, and she wondered just what exactly was the story between the two._

* * *

Fact: Suki woke up with a start, gasping and sweating and in general, a mess.

Fact: She began wondering if having dreams about your friends hooking up was significant, or if it meant you were just a messed up person.

Fact: She sought out her answers with Google.

Fact: It was there that she found out about a local fortune-teller of sorts who specialized in such matters, a woman by the name of Madame Wu...


	8. Enter Aunt Wu

**No real author's note this time, I just want to kiss all of my reviewers. Unless you don't want me to, of course, in which case I humbly bow and thank you for taking time to give me your input. Let us begin.**

Katara woke up blearily when her phone rang, her arms and legs akimbo. Unlike Toph, she had a nice, soothing ringtone that allowed her to relax and enjoy it for a bit before actually taking the call. She turned her sleepy eyes to the battered alarm clock on the desk next to her bed. 8:30 in the morning. She never woke up before eleven on weekends. This was a strange Sunday. With a groan, she stretched her arms high above her before picking up her cell.

"Hello?" she said with a yawn.

"Hello? Kat?"

"Suki? Why are you calling so early? Is something wrong?" She fought to stay awake; she got off the bed (wincing at the cold wooden floors) and continued to stretch, trying to regain feeling back in her limbs.

"I was just wondering if you were free today."

"Yeah, I... I guess I'm free today." Katara stifled another yawn. When would she ever learn to go to sleep earlier? "Why? What's up? And why did you call so early?"

"I, uh, had a... weird dream last night. And so I was googling some stuff real quick, and I found a link to this site..."

"Mmhm?" Katara set her phone on speaker and placed it on the desk. She sat on the ground and began touching her toes (if there was one thing she was proud of, it was her flexibility). She had to learn to sleep without moving around so much; she felt like she had just run a marathon, her legs were so sore.

"Well, I'll explain details later, but basically there's this really cool place that I want to go to, but I don't want to go alone."

"You still haven't told me why you called so early in the morning."

"Oh, I've been up since six."

Suki couldn't fall asleep after the dream, no matter how hard she had tried. So she'd given up and had waited for an appropriate time to call her friends (but had become impatient).

"Really? And you're not tired at all?"

"Nope!" Lies, but it didn't really matter. "Now, you keep on trying to wake yourself up, Katara dear, while I try calling Toph. I'll call you back with more details later!"

"You better not be taking me to a host bar... Again."

"I'll have you know, they were extraordinarily nice about the fact that we were underage. At the time."

"Suki!"

"Okay, okay, no bars with hot men serving drinks. I promise."

"Alright, I'll talk to you later."

"Bye!"

Suki hung up, and Katara rubbed the sleep out of her eyes as she walked to the bathroom. The house was always freezing in the mornings, and a good hot shower would be just the thing for-

"AAAUUGHH!" Sokka screamed in shock, when his sister opened the door.

"AAAUUGHH!" Katara screamed back, equally surprised.

Sokka fumbled with the razor he'd been using to shave with and lightly cut his cheek. Katara took a step back, slipped on a puddle of water, and fell to the ground, clutching the doorknob for support.

"_What are you doing here_?" yelled Sokka, splashing water furiously on his cheek. Shaving cream flew everywhere.

"_What do you mean what am I doing here? It's __**our**__ bathroom_!" she yelled back, wincing at the sudden pain on her backside.

"_You never wake up before eleven on weekends!"_

"_That doesn't mean you had to scream and scare the crap out of me!_"

_"My cheek is __**bleeding**__!"_

_"Just barely! I've had more severe papercuts than that! I have a bruise on my tailbone!"_

_"You made me draw blood! __**I think I'm worse off than you are**__!"_

_"__**You're such a child**__!"_

Yes, it was a strange Sunday indeed.

* * *

Meanwhile...

Toph awoke to the gentle, melodic chirps of birds and their wingbeats, and Beetoven's Violin Romance playing faintly in the foreground. The birds sang along with the crescendos of the melody, creating a gorgeous harmony between instrument and nature. She groaned loudly and covered her face with her hands in despondency.

Her parents had reinstalled that stupid, stupid, _stupid_ Easy Listening sound system again.

Today was going to suck _so_ hard.

She hopped off of her large bed, grabbing her walking stick as she did so. She walked to the center of her room, stood on the low table there, and used the stick to bash the speaker on her ceiling in. There was a bit of static and a fizzling noise, and the sound of the twittering monsters and squeaky instruments died. Good riddance. Toph got off the table, stumbled, an landed face-first on her sofa. Without moving or flinching, she began screaming into the cushions.

* * *

"Morning, Mom. Morning, Dad." Toph said wearily as she walked into the Dining Room, rubbing sleep out of her eyes.

"Good morning, Tophie, dear!" Her mother gushed while her father patted her affectionately on the head.

"Did you sleep well, Squirt?" asked her father.

Toph shrugged and poured herself a bowl (pottery imported from Egypt) of either Apple Jacks or Froot Loops, she couldn't tell yet.

"So, Tophie, did you like the Easy Listening sound system we installed for you again? I know you didn't like it much last time, when you were younger-"

"Three months ago." Toph interjected as she poured in some (fresh, organic) milk, careful not to spill. Her eyebrows rose and her lips were tight, but she looked otherwise calm.

"But I thought you would like it this time, Madame Tian recommended it specifically for you! It specifically utilizes the songs of twelve different dawn birds and juxtaposes it with the finest instruments of the Baroque period from Germany, one of which was actually carved from..."

She began to tune out here, knowing that her mother would prattle on for about five more minutes before directly addressing her again. She chewed slowly on her Froot Loops, her mom's words slowly becoming a buzzing in the background interrupted only when she ate. Her father made additional comments but mostly kept silent, reading the Business section of the papers.

"Ah, stocks are up by twelve points, pumpkin!" her father quipped cheerfully.

"Oh, don't talk business with me, honey, not at breakfast." her mother said with a giggle, lightly slapping her husband's arm.

Toph fought back the urge to shudder.

"Have some toast, Tophie, dear, I don't much like those packaged things."

"Yes, Mom." she answered in a monotone. She was about to reach for it when her mother grabbed the slice for her.

"Oh, now, now, now, don't bother yourself, Tophie, I'll do it for you." She began busying herself with the slice of (freshly baked) bread and dabbed some (Mediterranean, olive-oil based) butter onto it.

"Moooooom," Toph almost whined, "I can do it myself!"

"Darling, we're only trying to help you." Her father said in a comforting tone, patting her elbow affectionately.

"What if I don't need help?"

"We're helping you anyway, dearie."

She was seriously contemplating drowning herself in her milk (or using her spoon to pierce a vein and bleed to death) when her phone began to vibrate on the table (thank God she had set it to silent, if her parents heard her ringtone...). She quickly excused herself and ran from the Dining Room and into what her parents referred to as Parlor 3. Whatever a parlor was.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Toph! You seem awake."

"I was up for a while, Fangirl! Thanks for calling, I was twelve seconds away from doing something drastic. What's up?"

"Wanted to know if you were free today. Are you?"

"Not really, unless you count me letting the bloodhounds loose in the greenhouse where the orchids are grown."

"... Um. No...? Should I be concer-"

"Then yes, I am quite free! Why, where are we going?"

"Long story short, I found this place online that looks really interesting, and I thought you guys might like to come with me. Well, actually, to be honest, I'd look kind of weird going in there all by myself, so..."

"Oh? And where is this place that you're dragging us to?"

"Would you be satisfied with a 'you'll know when we get there?'"

"No, probably not. Would you tell me more if I said so?"

"Nope, don't think so."

"I see we have reached a mutual agreement."

"I'll pick you up at eleven?"

"Don't be late."

* * *

I _could_ put in a short montage of Katara and Toph getting ready to go, but then again how about no. Katara prepared, Toph prepared; at the last second, Toph brought the empty bottle of alcohol along in the hopes that one of them could read it for her.

Now back to the (primary) heroine of this story.

* * *

Toph jumped into the backseat of Suki's car, her walking stick in one hand and an empty bottle in the other.

"Hey Sugar Queen! Hey Fangirl!" she exclaimed while her friends greeted her. "Are you guys ready for another day of adventure?"

"I suppose... What's with the bottle" asked Katara suspiciously.

Toph could already tell that Katara would freak once she told her that she drank the contents, so she decided to keep that information to herself.

"Found it in the kitchen," she said quickly. "I was hoping one of you could read it for me."

"Savignon Amontillado, aged 24 years... Imported from the Matteo Vineyards of Italy." Katara read aloud, raising an eyebrow. "Never heard of it."

"I think I've heard of it before once," Suki turned her head slightly, "But I don't remember much. What's so important about it?"

"I was... I was just curious." She decided to change the subject. "I'm also curious about where we're going. Spill it, Fangirl!"

But Suki was immovable, only smiling and shaking her head.

"You'll find out when we get there. But don't worry, we'll be there soon."

"What if it's someplace we don't want to go?"

"Well, you can spend the rest of the car ride thinking of something to do, because we're going there anyway."

* * *

Zuko: I'm sorry.

Katara: Zuko? How did you get my number?

Zuko: Did you read my text or not?

Zuko: I said I'm sorry.

Zuko: Katara.

Zuko: Katara.

Zuko: Katara.

Zuko: You can't ignore me forever.

Zuko: What is your problem? How much more do I have to apologize before you accept it?

Zuko: It's not like I'm the only one at fault here, you punched me.

Zuko: Damn it, Katara!

* * *

Katara growled and turned the phone off, tired of the unceasing texts. When would he just give up and accept the fact that he was never, ever, ever, going to get back in her good books?

"Who was that, Sugar Queen?" Toph scratched her cheek.

"No one."

"No One seems to text you a lot."

"No One is annoying me, and if he doesn't stop I might do something violent."

"You gotta admit, No One is also devilishly handsome, in that emo, brooding kinda way..."

Katara choked and whipped her head around to face her.

"Toph!"

"What? Oh, I'm sorry, were we not talking about Sparky?"

"We weren't! Well, we were, but, you- how... How did you-?"

"You seemed extraordinarily pissed. Like... More so than usual. And I know of but one male who could do that to you!"

"What if it was my brother?"

"Oh please. That's nothing. I'm considering changing your nickname just because of him."

"Save it for later," Suki announced, parking outside of an inconspicuous looking store in a small plaza. "We've arrived!"

"Finally!" Toph hopped over the door and stretched her legs. "So where is this place, anyway?"

"Madame Wu's Fortune Telling," Katara read aloud, frowning in apprehension. "Do You Dare to Glimpse Into the Future? Palm Reading, Tarots, Horoscopes, and Much, Much More."

"_What_?" Toph spat into the ground.

"We drove all this way for some crackpot old lady to make up crap about our futures? What kind of dumb person would want to-"

"I can't wait!" Suki exclaimed excitedly, grabbing her friends' hands and leading them into the building. Katara glanced at Toph, who only glared at nothing at all.

* * *

Zuko: Sokka? You awake?

Sokka: Ugh, yes. Dumb sister cut my cheek.

Zuko: What?

Sokka: Well, technically I did, but I blame her anyway. What's up?

Zuko: Your sister's pissed at me.

Sokka: Yeah, I know. What happened, anyway?

Zuko: None of your business. I apologized at least fifteen times, and she's ignoring me.

Sokka: What? Seriously?

Zuko: I know!

Sokka: You apologized? YOU?

Zuko: You're really not helping me.

Sokka: Hold on, I'm saving that text about you apologizing.

Zuko: You're an idiot. Maybe I should go talk 2 Aang about it or something.

Sokka: No no no no no no, he thinks my sister's some kind of angel, he won't be able 2 help

Zuko: He did seem rly surprised when i told him she punched me...

Sokka: What? Seriously? You got punched? YOU? By HER?

Zuko: stfu i'm talking to Aang instead.

Sokka: Wait! Wait! Okay, I'll help. What do u want me 2 do?

Zuko: I don't know. What should I do?

Sokka: idk

Zuko: I'm talking to Aang.

Sokka: aaaugh okay, okay, maybe you should talk 2 her in person or something

Zuko: Is she at home right now?

Sokka: no, she went off with Suki somewhere. Speaking of which, can u help me?

Zuko: What is it?

Sokka: Suki's pissed off at me

Zuko: Why

Sokka: I was kind of an idiot to her

Zuko: Shocking.

Sokka: I mean it! And I need to get back to her good side. You guys are friends, right?

Zuko: Not exactly...

Sokka: Of course u are! Same campus, same physics class, amirite?

Zuko: Well yeah, but that doesn't necessarily mean that we're friends

Sokka: You two are lightly acquainted, and thats good enough. i just need u to ask about me, aight?

Zuko: What do u mean?

Sokka: Just be casual and stuff, ask about us, and then ask why she's pissed at me, then ask what i have 2 do to make her feel better, etc.

Zuko: I don't think you're asking the right person for this.

Sokka: no no no, I believe in you.

Zuko: ugh. Fine.

Sokka: Woot, thanks man

* * *

Toph grimaced as she walked into the small building. There was a fireplace in one corner of the room (who lights a fire in this weather?), and the oppressive heat mixed with the strange, unrecognizable smells in the air made it hard to breathe. The room was full of different jars and statues, and from the way her taller friends had to duck, she could guess that there was stuff hanging off of the ceiling, too. Ugh. At the large table in the center of the room sat an old woman, presumably Madame Wu, shuffling a deck of cards.

"Hello, Madame Wu!" Suki said politely. "We're here to have our fortunes told."

"Well, you've come to the right place!" The woman said, gesturing to the chairs on the other side of the table. "Please, call me Aunt Wu."

The three of them sat across from Aunt Wu, who put the cards away in her pocket.

"So, thank you for visiting my humble establishment. We specialize in all manners of divination, from palmistry to pyro-osteomancy, an ancient art passed to me from my ancestor a thousand generations past. Payments vary depending on how you would like your future told."

"We have to _pay_?" Toph grumbled under her breath. Suki elbowed her. Luckily her comment went unnoticed, and the woman handed brochures to Katara and Suki. Hmph. Maybe the old woman wasn't as senile as she thought.

"It says here that you also do... potions?" Katara sounded unsure, reading from the pamphlet.

"And crystal healing, but I'm afraid that falls under my assistant's specialties. Her name is Meng, and unfortunately she has Sundays off. However, you can feel free to come anytime."

"What do you mean by potions? Like... _real_ potions?"

Toph fought back an urge to snort. Seriously? Potions? Next they'll be selling magic wands and flying broomsticks.

"Of course! Our love potions are especially popular, due to their potency and..."

Ha! This woman was off her rocker. Love potions her goddamn ass. Why on earth would- Wait a minute! Toph sat up straight in her seat, a plan forming in her mind.

"... about the flavor. Although Meng isn't here, we _do_ have a bottle in the back. Only fifteen dollars. Are you interested?"

"No thank you." Katara said politely.

"How do you know it works?" Toph said suddenly. Katara and Suki looked at her, surprised. She was the last person they'd expected to care about such things.

"Everything we do is a subtle blend of faith and patience. We can't guarantee our products will work, but they will certainly give a 'push' to the outcomes. Would you like a bottle?" Aunt Wu said. If she was surprised at the sudden interest shown by the girl, she didn't show it.

"No thanks. I was just askin'." Toph said, slumping back in her chair. She continued plotting to herself while Aunt Wu continued.

"I recently hired a new assistant, although she has today off too. Nice girl, not too bright, but very happy. She does chakra massages and aura readings; neither are too popular yet, but she does get reasonable business..."

"Wow, pyro-osteomancy is pretty expensive!" Suki said aloud.

"It is an ancient art, and one we are _very_ popular for."

"I think I'll have my palm read, thank you."

"Alright. And what about you girls?" Aunt Wu said, addressing Toph and Katara.

Toph grumbled a reluctant "sure" while Katara nodded, looking a bit more excited than before. Suki handed her seven dollars and held out her hand. Aunt Wu pocketed the money and took her hand, examining the palm and making several "Hmm" sounds. Toph rolled her eyes. Why didn't the old woman just whip out a crystal ball while she was at it? This stuff was ridiculous. Soon she was going to say some vague, unclear crap about her future.

"Your future is now clear, but it is _you_ who intrigues me. You have a strange bond with the past. Perhaps a previous incarnation?"

"What do you mean?" she asked, breathless with excitement.

My God, thought Toph, she actually believes this?

"I'm sorry, but I'm afraid my talents lie with the future. I can't really tell you about any previous lives."

"Oh. Well... Out of curiosity... Would it be possible to... Go back to a previous incarnation?"

"No..." Aunt Wu said slowly, her eyebrow raised. "But in theory, if your tie to that life was strong enough for some reason... One could visit once in a while. Is there something you'd like to share?"

"Uh- no, nothing. I was just wondering. Please continue."

She shrugged and examined her palm once more.

"You will have a long, happy life. There will be many difficult times, but nonetheless, you will rise to each challenge with every bit of your strength. You will marry a man with much pain and anguish in his life. Most of which is, actually, self inflicted."

Suki's face fell.

"I'm going to marry an emo guy?"

Toph coughed loudly, something that sounded like _Sparky!_, but Suki ignored her.

"I wouldn't say that," Aunt Wu continued. "But he will make several unwise decisions; luckily you will be able to instill some sense into him. You will probably be the dominant one in the relationship. Hmm... Let's see... Your life is full of happiness and cheer, thanks to your laid-back outlook on life. But I suggest you take things more seriously, in order to create better balance. You will have to face a difficult test soon, and this Wednesday is an auspicious day for you. Perhaps it will be a good time to open up your heart and forgive whomever you might need to forgive."

Suki frowned at the thought of Sokka and quickly brushed it aside.

"Is that all?"

"If you wish, I could give you some information on how you will die, or some more details on your love life."

"That's okay. I'd really rather not know. Surprise is the spice of life."

"Very well. Now it is your turn." Aunt Wu turned to Katara, who eagerly held out her hand after paying.

"The water element is strong in you. Each person embodies the elements, of course, with varying strengths in each one. Your water element is particularly strong. A little bit of fire, as well. An odd combination, but not unheard of!"

"What does it mean? A strong water and fire element?"

Toph almost gagged at the enthusiasm in her voice, but listened anyway, interested despite herself.

"Oh, nothing you've never heard of before. Water is the element of change; it means you are able to flow past any obstacle, like a river or stream. As for fire, it means you have inner strength, and unwavering determination."

Katara smiled proudly at that.

"Let's see... You will live a happy life, although not without its darker moments. You suffer from mild inner turmoil, but you should be able to overcome that in the next year or two. You will marry a stubborn, but strong man. You-"

"What do you mean by stubborn and strong?" Katara said suddenly.

"It's what it sounds like."

"What does he look like? Will he be older or younger than me? Do I know him? Will I meet him or-"

A quick glare shut her up, and Aunt Wu continued.

"There is a bit of uncertainty in your future, but nothing incredibly severe. Your tendency to bear a heavy load without any assistance will shape your life. Or more specifically, your motherly ways will lead to reckless actions, simply for the sake of being careless for once. I advise you to relax and relieve some stress before you do something you regret."

"Told you." Toph said with a smirk, punching Katara's arm.

"Oh, hush. Anyway, Aunt Wu, is that all? Could you tell me more about my love life?" she said enthusiastically, ignoring Suki's giggles. Toph had gone strangely silent.

"Very well!" Aunt Wu examined her hand again, furrowing her brow in concentration. "Hmm. The slow buildup of sexual tension between you and your destined will delight onlookers quite a bit. They will be able to guess that your futures are intertwined before either of you do."

She turned a blind eye to Katara's mortified expression and her friends' loud guffaws and continued relentlessly.

"Eventually your sexual frustration will-"

"_Okay t__hat's quite enough, thank you very much_!" Katara yelled quickly, pulling her hand away in panic. She glared at her friends, both of whom were clutching their stomachs and laughing.

"Very well." Aunt Wu shrugged and turned to Toph. "It's your turn, young lady."

"Hahaha, o-okay..." Toph said, wiping a small tear from the corner of her eye. She handed her money over and held out her hand, still chuckling lightly.

"The earth element is strong, more so than anyone I've ever met." Aunt Wu said, sounding impressed. "The very embodiment of strength and solidity. Your significant other will be a happy, adventurous-"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold on. I don't want to hear about any significant others. There will be no significant others! I don't want any significant others!"

"Alright, if that's what you _really_ want!" The woman sounded more amused than anything. "The future isn't written in stone, anyway. Your life will never be too boring, thanks to your thirst for adventure. Your significant other- that is, if you had one, which you don't..."

Toph's angry stare lightened up a bit.

"... Will share your love of excitement and support you, although you will act as an anchor for him. Not that you will bring him down, only steady him. You will meet many new people soon, and I suggest you treat them well and befriend them; you never know when you will need them. You-"

"Will I become famous?" Toph asked seriously.

"Many people will know your name."

"A lot of people know my name already. Will I ever be _famous_?"

"I won't say any more than that!"

Toph pouted and slumped in her seat, crossing her arms. "Poop. Well, that's all I really wanted to know."

Aunt Wu smiled. "Will that be all, ladies?"

"I think so," said Suki, standing up and stretching her legs. "Thank you very much, Aunt Wu!"

Katara and Toph thanked her too, and the woman simply smiled and waved demurely.

* * *

"That was _so_ embarrassing!" Katara whined once they reached outside, wincing at the sudden sunlight. "I can't believe she _said_ that about me!"

"Hahaha! See? Your chaste fantasies about long walks in the beach and hugging aren't meant to be! You should accept the fact that one day you and your 'significant other' will be sharing body heat..."

Katara made that noise all girls make when offended and began chasing Suki around the car, threatening to hit her with her bag. Toph seized her opportunity.

"Oh, geez, I left my wallet back inside! I'll be back!" she yelled, before slipping back into the small store. Aunt Wu seemed surprised to see her.

"Yes?"

"Hello, sorry, I was wondering if I could buy that love potion?" Toph held up a twenty dollar bill.

The look of surprise was quickly replaced by a mischievous, knowing smile.

"I see." she said slowly. Toph suddenly didn't feel so sure. Aunt Wu slipped into a back room for a few seconds and came back holding a small glass bottle that could easily fit into the palm of her hand. Toph carefully took it. There was a tag with instructions on it; she ran her fingers along the paper and was pleased to find that the letters were embossed, and she could read it.

"Thank you, I didn't want to buy it in front of my friends, it's important they don't see..."

"Oh, no, it's perfectly understandable!" There it was again, that mischievous tone. Toph stiffened slightly. "Many girls your age develop an interest in the opposite sex, and it's perfectly natural that you would want to catch a certain boy's attention..."

For the second time in her life, Toph turned red.

"Wh-What? N-no, it's not for me! It's s-supposed to be for-" she began to sputter, but Aunt Wu was already ushering her out the door, thanking her for her business and bidding her a good day.

The door slammed behind her, and Toph felt the heat in her face go away. An evil grin took its place. Phase one of her plan had been completed! Now all she had to do was slip the love potion into Sugar Queen's drink, and then after a vague series of events, she'd like Twinkletoes! Oh man, was he gonna _freak_ when she told him her plan! Yes, it was a bit far fetched, and yeah, the details needed some work, but the plan was genius! _Genius_! Man, was she a good friend, or what? She tore off the instructions and put the small bottle in her pocket before walking towards Suki and Katara.

"What took so long?" asked Suki, her eyebrow raised at the sight of Toph's maniacal grin.

"Oh, nothing!" she replied with a dark chuckle. The chuckle turned into full blown laughter, and her friends only stared.

Katara opened her mouth to say something, stopped, and shook her head.

"You know what, I don't even want to know. This has become the norm for you, somehow." she said, resigned.

* * *

Back in Suki's car, Toph read the instructions from the bottle. Thank you for purchasing blah blah blah, powerful draught, blah blah, exercise caution, blah blah blah... Where was the juicy stuff? Ah, here it is!

_Put a single drop in another drink. This can be any drink, from water to milk, but will work especially well with Oolong Tea. _

What the hell is Oolong? Whatever.

_Have the couple in question share the drink. The potion will begin to work anywhere between thirty seconds and ten minutes. In that time, the attraction between the two will have increased substantially, although this may be invisible to all outsiders. Effectiveness varies depending on the relationship between the two and their compatibility. This potion only works between two people. If a third party drinks, it will not affect them._

Hmm. So... In theory, if she put more than one drop in, they'll totally fall for each other! Not to mention they're already perfect for each other, with their girly (less so for Twinkletoes, but one cannot deny his femininity), innocent personalities! Oh wait, what's this? ...

_Warning: Only put __**one**__ drop in. The potion is a powerful aphrodisiac and must be diluted with a base drink. Use once a month._

What's an aphrodisiac? ... Oh wait! How could she be so stupid? Aphrodite was the goddess of love! So... This is a powerful love potion? Yeah, that had to be it. Man, she was good.

_Possible side effects include fevers, increased anxiety, increased tension, heightened states of emotion..._

Yeah, yeah, okay, she'd read everything worth reading. Soon, her plan would hatch, and everything would turn out okay! All she had to do was wait. Unless, of course, the love potion turned out to be a dud! Toph smacked her forehead. Of course! She got ripped off! It even says an outsider wouldn't be able to tell if it worked or not!

_Well, whatever_, she said to herself firmly. It was too late now, and she was going through the plan even if it killed her. Twinkles was her friend, and she was going to help him. Besides, she was pretty sure Sweetness didn't like anyone and she deserved to have a guy as loyal as him. But then there was that thing Aunt Wu had said about her having a significant other...

"Hey, Sweetness?"

"Yeah, Toph?"

"What do you think about Twinkletoes?"

Katara raised an eyebrow at the question. "What do you mean? That was kind of random..."

"You know! I mean... What do you think?"

"Well, he's very smart, for one thing. He's kind, funny, athletic... He's _really_ scary when he's mad."

"What? Twinkles gets mad?" Toph asked in surprise, momentarily forgetting her noble quest.

"Yeah, you should see him. He's crazy scary." Suki added, nodding. "Lightning shoots out of his eyes and stuff."

"Not really." Katara rolled her eyes and smiled. "But yeah, it's hard to calm him down when he goes into Rage mode."

Toph felt curious. Now she _had_ to get him mad and see what happens.

"Anyway, why do you ask?"

"What?"

"Why'd you ask about what I think of Aang?"

"Oh, uh, nothing really. Just wondering."

"Oh. Okay."

They sat in silence for a while.

"Would you say he's... stubborn?"

Katara finally caught on, and felt her jaw drop. She turned in her seat to face Toph, her eyes as wide as dinner plates.

"Are you- Are you saying _he's the one I might marry_?" Katara managed to say, to which Toph raised her hands defensively.

"I'm just saying! I mean, I dunno if he likes you or anything," she lied smoothly, "But you guys would make a cute couple! Both of you are nerds- Don't deny it, Sugar Queen- and you guys are both ridiculously nice, and you both are so innocent and sweet that it makes me want to barf my pancreas out. You guys are almost exactly the same. Ergo, you guys should date."

Before Katara could form any sort of rebuttal, Suki had scoffed.

"Oh, please! Katara and Aang are alright, but she'd look so much better with Zuko!"

"_What_?" Toph and Katara exclaimed (but for very different reasons).

"It's true! They have all this... This chemistry and tension between them, they look hot together, and they're completely different! Total opposites, in fact. And everyone knows that opposites attract!"

"Suki! Have you forgotten that I'm kind of shunning him right now?"

"Exactly my point! You're shunning him! You've never shunned anyone before! You've never been so angry at anyone before. That emotion is solely reserved for him."

"That's not a good thing!"

"Yeah! Sweetness deserves Twinkletoes!" Toph said, panicking slightly but not showing it. She hadn't considered competition for her affection! What would Twinkles say if he knew? That kid was too sensitive for his own good, he'd end up crying or something... "Besides! She hates Sparky! Why would she like him?"

"Oh, I don't know! I'm willing to bet that half the texts he sent her were all apologies. _She_ may not like _him_, buuut..."

Suki laughed loudly, ignoring Katara's angry stutters.

"No way! Katara and Aang is where it's at." Toph said, momentarily forgetting the nicknames.

"Zuko and Katara." Suki countered calmly.

"Katara and Aang."

"Zuko and Katara."

"Katara and Aang!"

"Zuko and Katara!"

"_Kataang_!"

"_Zutara_!"

"KATAANG!"

"ZUTARA!"

"STOP!" Katara yelled, effectively shutting the two up. "First off! What the heck was that? Kataang? Zutara?"

"It's a portmanteau of Katara and Aang." Toph said wisely, putting a finger up. "You know, to shorten it."

"Same with Zuko and Katara." Suki said, nodding.

"That has to be the two most ridiculous things I've ever heard in my entire life." Katara said, shaking her head slowly. "And secondly, have you guys considered _my_ opinions about this?"

Suki and Toph thought about this very carefully.

"No," they said simultaneously, and high-fived each other.

Katara sighed and threw her hands in the air.

"I give up. There's no changing you two."

"Alright, let's change the subject, for Katara's sake." Suki said. "We'll have an intellectual conversation at Mr. Iroh's place, how about it?"

"Sure, why not." Katara smiled.

"Yeah, even if he does ridiculously overprice everything, frugal old Pops."

* * *

Iroh furrowed his brows at the problem before him. His next action was a matter of life and death. He had to use every bit of wit and cunning he had in order to get out of this one. If he failed... He didn't want to think about the consequences. He closed his eyes, trying not to heed his opponent's confident smirk. _Think, Iroh, Think_... Suddenly the answer came to him out of the blue. Yes... Yes, that would work! He opened his eyes, calm as anything, and set down the Bamboo tile on the board. He relished the shocked look on his opponent's face.

"I win, Anshi."

The elderly group surrounding the two began clapping, and he couldn't help but grin as Anshi scowled and slammed thirty dollars onto the table.

"Damn you, Iroh," he said amiably (but grudgingly). "I thought I had you with the Tiger tile."

"There are no dead ends in Pai Sho, if played between two masters. You played well, but got too confident. I must say, I feel guilty for taking advantage of your pride. It wasn't a loss you deserved."

Anshi look relieved for a moment.

"But!" Iroh said, grabbing the money, licking his thumb and shuffling through the bills, "That doesn't mean you can get out of our little bet!"

"You cheap old man." Anshi said, laughing with the rest of the White Lotus (a Pai Sho fanclub of sorts). "One day I'll beat you, yet!"

"Until then, how about another round of drinks?" he said loudly, addressing the entire congregation. They all cheered and sat back in their tables, while Iroh stood up and gestured to Kang (who worked every Sunday, Wednesday and Thursday) to make some more tea. He nodded tiredly (he made oceans of tea everytime his boss's White Lotus group came over...) and retreated back into the kitchen.

It was then that Suki, Katara and Toph stepped through the doors.

"My young friends!" he said happily, hugging them (and fist-bumping with Toph). "It is good to see you again! Kang! Make more tea!"

A weary "Yes sir" drifted to them from the kitchen.

"Sit, sit!" Iroh ushered them to their old table and sat them down. "What brings you here?"

Katara opened her mouth to speak, but Suki beat her.

"Mr. Iroh, don't you think that Katara would look really good with Zuko?"

Katara looked at her with a glare that could cause heart attacks in small animals, but Suki didn't notice. Iroh seemed surprised, but began stroking his beard contemplatively. His nephew and Katara, eh? He hadn't thought of that! What a marvelous idea! He'd have some fun setting the two up! But looking at the glare on the young girl's face, he could tell that she wanted no part in this. He would have to pretend to be on her side, he decided, before playing matchmaker. He shook his head gravely.

"I'm afraid I do not agree. Zuko has had his share of girlfriends in the past, and quite frankly, I do not believe that Katara is his type."

Katara gave him a relieved, thankful look, and Iroh smiled back (almost feeling guilty for deceiving her. Almost).

"Zuko's had girlfriends?" Suki and Toph exclaimed.

"Oh yes," he said, grinning at this new distraction. "Would you like to hear more?"

They nodded enthusiastically. Even Katara looked intrigued. No jealousy in her eyes. Darn.

"Well, first there was a girl named Song, a sweet, young thing, brunette. Why, I remember this one time..."

* * *

Zuko snapped his pencil in half mid-sentence. He blinked in surprise. He had just been taking notes during a lecture on the more misogynistic bits of Shakespeare's works when he'd been filled with an overwhelming urge to cause bodily harm to his Uncle.

Huh. Weird. He grabbed the piece with the pencil tip and continued writing.

* * *

Iroh smiled serenely at the three girls before him, who were discussing this latest bit of gossip (although Katara was more reluctant, since she was technically supposed to still be mad at Zuko).

"I can't _believe_ he went out with a girl and didn't tell me!" Toph said, disgusted and delighted at the same time. Oh, he wasn't going to hear the end of this.

"See? He's into quiet, sweet girls! Although honestly, who would've guessed..." Suki added, putting her hand under her chin in thought.

"I'm surprised such a jerk got a girlfriend at all." Katara put her nose in the air.

Hmm. Iroh decided to throw in a bit more gossip. You know. Just to shake things up.

"They broke up after a few months, since she had to move to Korea with her parents due to their jobs."

"Oh. That's really sad..." Katara admitted.

"And that's when I met Jin."

"Jin?" Toph looked shocked. "He had _two_ girlfriends and _never_ told me?"

"Tell us more!" Suki grinned excitedly.

"Well, there's not too much of a story. She was enamored by him, and came here as often as she could, hoping to see him. You should have heard her speak of him, as though he could do no wrong. Eventually they went on a date, and the rest, as they say, was history!"

Suki _D'aaaawwwwwww_ed while Toph mimed gagging. Katara couldn't help but giggle at the prospect of a _good _Zuko.

"I still remember the time when I'd gone to the storage closet for some extra tea leaves and saw them together..."

He smiled at their raucous laughter. He loved embarrassing his nephew.

"You walked in on them making out?" Toph pounded on the table, cackling. She remembered the romance novels she used to force him to read and laughed even harder. "Does he have any other ex's we should know about?"

"Well... There was one girl..."

They immediately hushed, eagerly listening.

"They were quite similar in many ways. I think it may have grown into something true and long lasting, given enough time. Unfortunately, some things happened... And they were forced to separation. I cannot give you more details, as it is not my story to tell. However, I will say that she was given a choice, and in the end he felt betrayed. Very much so, in fact, and to this day he refuses to speak of her."

The eager expressions on their faces immediately turned guilty and empathetic. The happy mood had died. Whoops. Good job, Iroh. Luckily for him, people were like Pai Sho, and hell if he wasn't good at playing the game.

"Have I ever told you that Zuko was given singing lessons as a child?"

The grins returned. He gave himself a mental pat in the back.

"Let me tell you more about it over a nice cup of tea..."

* * *

Sokka stared blankly at the screen. Food Network. *_Click_* Cartoons. *_Click_* The news. *_Click_* Sports. *_Click_* More news.

He groaned and turned off the TV. Today had to be the most boring-ass day of his life. And he couldn't think of any way to get Suki to forgive him.

Another groan.

He wished she were here.

* * *

"Would it be possible for me to get a job here?" Katara asked out of the blue. The three others turned to stare at her.

"What? I could use some experience, and I need money."

"You do?" Toph frowned. She didn't often think of her friends' financial situations.

"Well, not _desperately_, but still."

Iroh stroked his beard again.

"Well, Miss Katara, I suppose I could always use another waitress..."

"Really?" Katara straightened in her seat, her eyes shining. "Could I?"

"Have you any experience?"

"Oh, uh..." Was this going to be her job interview? "Well, I'm an okay chef... And I used to help out at my Grandma's restaurant, and I-"

"Alright! Wednesdays are good for me." Iroh smiled. That also happened to be the same day his nephew worked, but no need to mention that, of course.

"Only on Wednesdays? How about Wednesdays and the weekend?"

"I'm sorry, but since we offer lowered prices on Wednesdays, it's when I need the most helpers."

Katara nodded. "I understand. I'll just find another part-time somewhere else, too."

"Why do you need two jobs?" Suki asked, poking her arm.

"If my calculations are correct, having two sources of income would be considerably better than only one." Katara stuck out her tongue before turning to Iroh. "When can I start?"

"This Wednesday is good. My uh... Other employee has been here longer than you. He can start training you then."

"Thank you so much, sir! I won't let you down!" Katara shook his hand excitedly.

It made him feel almost guilty about tricking her. Almost. But grandchildren are grandchildren, and he wasn't letting his nephew continue being his angsty self because of his ex.

* * *

Zuko stared incredulously at the snapped pencil in his hand. It had been the second time he'd felt homicidal towards his uncle today, and now he had four broken pieces littering his space. What the hell was going on? He borrowed a pencil from the girl next to him and continued writing. Some things he just didn't question, and this was one of them.


	9. In Which Like Nothing Happens

**HEY. HEY YOU. IF YOU REVIEWED THIS STORY, I MAY OR MAY NOT BE DESPERATELY IN LOVE WITH YOU. No? Too creepy? Ah. Well. Cough. Um. My apologies. But yes, thank you so much, everyone who reviewed! I can't exactly individually thank you all (partially because I only check FF once a week or so, and partially because half of my reviewers are anonymous), but know this: I spent at least five minutes per individual review squealing like a thirteen year old girl at a Jonas Brothers concert (no offense to Jonas Bros. fans and/or thirteen year old girls). Yeah, I'm such a noob. Also I changed my penname! Yaaay**

**Q and A:**

**1) How was Toph able to read the label on the bottle if she's blind?**

**No, I did not forget she was blind, nor does she have a superpower. In the story, she's able to feel embossed/engraved words with her fingers and read what's written. She can't read regular print, but the label had embossed words. Hope that clears things up!**

**2) Will Azula ever make an appearance, and will she still be the same, crazed, power-hungry despot?**

**Yes, Azula will come into the story, and I'm trying to decide between making her the bitchy enemy of the Gaang, or making her a crazed, highly eccentric/Machiavellian **_**friend**_** of the Gaang. What do **_**you**_**, the reader, want? :O**

**That's it for the questions, now back to our regular installment of plotless friendship shenaniganistan stories.**

* * *

Toph sipped loudly from her cup of tea. She typically had a thing against anything that wasn't soda (and let's face it, tea is the chemical _opposite_ of soda), but Pops' drinks were an exception. After all, he was a nice guy, pretty funny, and he told good stories, too, and she was obligated to drink what he offered her. He was like a sober version of Old Man Bumi. It also helped that his tea was the best damn stuff she'd ever had the privilege to drink in her entire seventeen years of being alive. He had just finished up a fascinating story about Zuko's childhood (something about crying when he'd dropped his ice cream) when Katara had brought up a most worrisome idea.

"I'm going to miss this," she had said with a small, content sigh. "Hanging out with you all like this, I mean."

"What?" Toph put the cup down roughly, eyes wide. "What do you mean?"

Katara realized her small mistake and quickly corrected herself.

"I meant I'm going to miss being with you guys for the next few weeks. Finals are coming up, remember?"

"Oh yeah," Suki pouted slightly. "I forgot about that. Is that the big test thingy Aunt Wu predicted?"

"I don't get it." Toph crossed her arms, still sounding a bit alarmed. "What do finals have to do with anything?"

"We're going to have to study a lot, you know. It has a serious impact on our grades, and it's important that we work hard to prepare. We won't have enough time to hang out like this."

Suki mumbled something about cramming, but Katara either didn't hear or chose to ignore her.

"Oh." Toph was still for a minute before punching Katara's arm. "You had me scared there, for a moment. I thought you were moving away or something! That'd suck. A _lot_."

There was a short pause, and Toph's eyes widened again.

"Goddammit, _no_!" she exclaimed, putting her hands on the table. "I forgot! You and Snoozles are going to _college_!"

She groaned loudly and slammed her head onto the table.

"I hate my life." she declared, sounding muffled. "I wait years to be able to go to a real school, and when I do, I end up making friends with people that are just going to be gone after a few months."

"Oh Toph..." Suki patted her head reassuringly. "It's not so bad!"

"Yeah! I mean, we'll still see each other, right? And you'll always have Aang!" Katara added.

Toph turned her head to the side, so that they could see her face.

"True..." she said, her expression lightening a teensy bit.

"There's also Smellerbee, and Longshot."

Toph smiled a bit.

"And we have all summer to have fun!" Suki added cheerfully.

She contemplated this before speaking.

"You know what?" She brought her head up from the table, sitting up straight. "You're right! In fact, I have an idea. Hey Pops! Could you gimme some paper and something to write with?"

"Of course." Iroh, instead of getting up, yelled at Kang (who worked Sundays, Wednesdays and Thursdays!) to bring the materials over.

"Here you are." said the boy, setting a notepad and pen on the table they were at.

Katara thanked him politely, making him blush and smile shyly her way. Iroh frowned at this. Oh, no. He'd already staked her out as his nephew's.

"Get back in the kitchen, Kang."

"Yes sir." Iroh kept an eye on his retreating form. Hmmm. If the boy developed a crush on the girl, it'd be a problem.

"Suki!" Toph thrusted the paper and pen into her hands. "Dictate! And press hard, I need to be able to read it."

"Err... Alright? What do you want me to-"

"First! The Heading!" Toph hopped out of her chair and began pacing, one hand on her chin and the other behind her back. "Write down- in capital letters, don't forget it- 'The Plans We Absolutely, Positively Have to Execute During Our Summer Vacation.'"

Suki blinked before writing the title.

"And don't make it small! We have an entire notepad, and small is not good enough for the awesome that will be The Plans! And I repeat, _press hard_. I _need_ to be able to read what you write."

Suki tore off the page she'd been writing on and began again, only bigger.

"Done."

"Good! Under that, write 'Not necessarily in chronological order,' but smaller, this time. Now this is going to be in 1), 2), 3) format, alright?Okay, for the first point, Number One, write down 'Camping Outside. With a Tent'!"

There was a brief silence, interrupted only by the sound of Suki writing.

"Done."

"Alright!" Toph suddenly pivoted on her heels, pointing directly at Katara, who looked startled. "Sugar Queen! Give us a suggestion for point Two!"

"Uhh... Umm..."

"Come on, come on, pick up the pace here!"

"Err... Go to the Huizong Theme Park at its anniversary?"

"I do not know what that is!" Toph said loudly, still pointing at her.

"It's kind of far... A thirty minute drive... They have rides, funhouses, games..."

"Your idea is accepted! Suki?"

"Already written. Ooh, how about the beach? I love beaches!"

Toph hesitated for a moment. She'd never gone to the beach before, and with good reason... Bah, who cares?

"Good plan! That will be Number Three!" she turned to Iroh, who looked very amused. "You got any ideas, Pops?"

"Instead of just any beach, how about going to my beach home at Ember Island? There you could also take a ride on my old ship..."

Suki gasped excitedly, while Toph and Katara just stared. The older girl looked at them in shock.

"Ember Island? Hello? The vacation spot to end all vacation spots?" Suki waved her arms in the air, trying to convey her message as clearly as possible. "Oh, never mind. It's really famous."

She turned back to Iroh, her eyes gleaming.

"Would you really let us go to your beach home there? _Really_?"

"Why not? It has been empty for quite some time, now, and I no longer have much use for it." His real motives involved his nephew coming along, but they didn't need to hear that yet.

"But it's so expensive! How would we afford the plane ride there and back?"

"I suppose I could get you tickets..." Iroh said with a grin. "At a reduced price."

Suki's face fell, but she couldn't help smiling anyway.

"Thank you so much, Mr. Iroh! You're the best friend I have who's older than thirty." she exclaimed happily. "I can't wait until summer!"

"That's what The Plans are for." Toph smirked, proud of her awesome idea. "Okay, so cross out Beach and put down Ether Island."

"You mean Ember."

"Whatever. Any more suggestions?"

"Ooh, I have one!"

And the three girls continued on like this for quite a while, with a few helpful inputs from Iroh, who was very amused by the whole thing. They gathered around Suki, yelling out different ideas while she wrote. Eventually the Plans were complete (filled with every idea they'd come up with, although whether they had enough time to do everything was uncertain), and Toph folded it up and placed it in her pocket, proclaiming herself as the Plan Bearer.

"And I'm keeping this locked up until the first day of summer vacation. Then I'm opening it, reading it, and we are going to eviscerate, demolish, and destroy this list!" Toph announced loudly. She thought for a minute, and went on to say, "And by that, I mean we're going to do almost everything that's written inside!"

* * *

Sokka: Zuko?

Zuko: What.

Sokka: I'm bored

Zuko: Good story.

Sokka: No seriously. Wanna hang out?

Zuko: I don't know. I just finished class, and I need to go over my notes.

Sokka: Don't be a bum, you nerdy mcnerd nerd.

Zuko: Gee, now I REALLY want to go.

Sokka: Come on, dude, I'm lonely over here.

Zuko: I don't swing that way.

Sokka: THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEAN.

Zuko: Still, no. I need to study.

Sokka: Don't be a bum, you nerdy mcnerd nerd.

Sokka: Zuko.

Sokka: Zuko.

Sokka: ZuUuUuUuUuUuUuUuko

Zuko: WHAT.

Sokka: Wanna hang out?

Zuko: No.

Sokka: Why not?

Zuko: I'm studying.

Sokka: Don't be a bum.

Sokka: Zuko.

Sokka: Zuko.

Zuko: Don't even think about starting that again.

Sokka: Wanna hang out?

Zuko: I am driving to your house and I am burning it down.

Sokka: What time will you be coming over?

Zuko: Never.

Sokka: Come on!

Sokka: Pleeeeaaaaassssseeee?

Sokka: I have Super Smash Bros Brawl! You know you want to!

Sokka: I also have PSW Sports and Twilight Princess~

Zuko: No.

Sokka: If you come over, you can apologize to my sister once she comes home!

Zuko: Do you really think I'm that desperate to make amends with her?

Sokka: ...

Sokka: Weeeell?

Zuko: Twenty minutes. Don't say a word.

* * *

"Did I tell you guys about that time when Sparky accidentally burnt my feet?"

Katara, Suki and Iroh looked at her in shock.

"He did what?" Suki exclaimed loudly (causing many heads to turn her way).

"Relax, it wasn't _too_ bad. Anyway, we were setting fire to some stuff in my backyard-"

"Please tell me there's a logical reason why." Katara pinched the bridge of her nose. Iroh didn't seem very surprised at the thought of his nephew setting fire to things (which, in itself, was alarming).

"Actually, there was! We were trying to find out how easily different materials burned. My parents bought me a lot of crap I didn't use, like rocking horses, dollhouses, and other dumb toys, and Sparky suggested this little experiment in order to learn and at the same time get rid of my things. It was in the name of science."

Suki and Katara smacked their foreheads while Iroh rolled his eyes. Kids these days.

"Anyway, one of the things we set fire to was this Tickle Me Elmo toy that I had. And holy crap, it was the _biggest_ mistake of our _entire_ lives."

"Why?" Suki asked.

"Well, at first it was really funny, because, you know, we were setting fire to popular childhood icons. But then it starts _laughing_. I mean, Tickle Me Elmos were supposed to do that, you know? Laugh when you touch it? But the fire messed up its soundbox, and it won't stop laughing and making weird, demonic noises, and by then Sparky and I are totally convinced that the Devil was possessing it."

"Did it run up to you and burn your feet?" Katara exclaimed.

They turned to look at her.

"What? She said it seemed possessed, and it was on fire, and she burnt her feet! I made a _connection_."

"Unfortunately, Sweetness, I didn't sustain those injuries in quite so cool a way. In fact, now that I think about it, it's kind of embarrassing."

Suki urged her to continue. "Go on, tell us what happened!"

"Well... I kind of began panicking- and I was young, don't blame me- especially since it was closer to me, so Sparky runs around the backyard trying to find some water, right?"

Toph frowned a bit at the memory.

"He comes running back with a bucket, and I can tell something's off. I have a pretty good sense of smell; better than most people's, but before I can say anything he splashes it all over the toy."

Suki and Katara waited. Iroh could already guess what had happened. Toph sipped her tea before continuing.

"Turns out it was lighter fluid from the toolshed. I don't quite remember what happened next, it's kind of fuzzy, but I remember screaming and crying and flipping out while Sparky apologized like he'd accidentally killed my parents or something. I had to go to the E.R. and everything!" Toph chuckled, but stopped almost immediately when no one joined her.

She had expected some sort of laughter at this story (which, in her opinion, was pretty funny) and was disconcerted at her friends' complete lack of reactions.

"That..." Suki finally managed to say, breaking the silence. "That is _horrible_..."

"I am so, so, _so_ sorry, Toph." Katara shook her head slowly.

"My nephew _will_ be punished for such foolishness." Iroh said, looking grave.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, chill, you guys! It was a long time ago, and I'm fine now! It's _funny_." Toph insisted stubbornly. "Really! And I spent months making him pay me back for it. It's no big deal. Really!"

Despite her protests, the atmosphere remained somber. Well... Damn it.

* * *

_*Ding Dong*_

Sokka opened the door to find an awkward-looking Zuko standing there with his hands in his jean pockets.

"Zuko! You made it! Come on in, amigo, sit yourself down."

The older boy grunted in reply and lightly stepped into the living room.

"Your house is freezing." He said simply, flopping unceremoniously onto the sofa.

"It's nice to see you, too. Want anything to eat or drink? We have warm water, lukewarm water, and cold water!"

"Joy."

"Cold water it is! Would you like some cube-shaped frozen water with your cold water?"

"How are you _not_ starving right now?"

"Katara usually comes home with the groceries during the week." Sokka said, setting down the (dirty) cups of water on the table. "When she doesn't, we usually go out to eat."

Zuko eyed the suspicious looking cups with distaste.

"Does she do the dishes, too?"

"How'd you know?"

"Lucky guess. So... She's basically the mom of the house."

"Pretty much. Our mom died when we were little. I don't think she ever got over it."

"Oh... I didn't know. I... I'm sorry." His expression softened, and Sokka shrugged.

"Don't worry about it. It was a long time ago, I'm okay with it now."

The statement hung in the air, and the two sat in uncomfortable silence.

"So... What about your father?"

"Navy. He sends us paychecks with his letters every month. We usually see him once or twice a year."

"Oh..."

Zuko rubbed his arm. He sucked at talking to people about this kind of stuff. What did one say? I'm sorry? No, that makes it sound like it's a bad thing... But it is a bad thing! But you only say that when someone died or something... But he did say that when they were talking about his mother! Was that too insensitive? Was it too little? Sokka seemed to sense his discomfort and smiled widely, hopping off the sofa.

"Who's up for some Twilight Princess?" he sang, pulling out a dusty, battered-looking game console from under the small table on which the TV sat.

"An X-Cube? Really, Sokka?" Zuko said, relieved at the change of topic.

"Hey, it's a classic, alright? Not everyone can afford the newest consoles. Besides, It's harder to play Legend of Zelda with a Playstation Wii."

"I've never played Legend of Zelda."

Sokka gasped aloud and clutched his hand to his heart as though he'd been shot.

"Not play... Legend of Zelda...?" He managed to say, horrified. "Th-That is _nothing_ short of _blasphemy_!"

"Uh..."

"There, there." Sokka nodded, patting Zuko's hand comfortingly. "Don't you fret. I should have known that you didn't play Legend of Zelda when I first saw you. You have the sad, dull, gray eyes of the unenlightened."

"My eyes aren't-"

"But don't worry! I will lead you out of the cave of ignorance! Come! Today, we journey to Hyrule!"

"To wha-"

Sokka slapped a controller into his hands on turned the console on.

"Sifu Sokka has entered the building."

* * *

"So, Fangirl." Toph said, delicately shoving two whole pork dumplings in her mouth. "What was with you interrogating Snoozles about your love lives, anyway?"

"What does she mean?" Katara turned to Suki, who shrugged.

"I guess I forgot to tell you. Your brother and I are not on speaking terms. Or at least, I'm not."

"What? Why?"

"Well..."

* * *

"And now, all you have to do is smash that crate and dig through from under the bars to escape the cell."

"Why can't that hideous elf-thing just open the door for me?"

"Her name is Midna and she's testing you! Seeing if you're worthy of her help!"

"I'm not submitting myself to that kind of humiliation! Who is she to use me like some kind of pawn?"

"Just do it, already!"

"Can't I just pretend to be injured and howl a lot to attract guards and then bite off their jugulars once they open the door?"

"Strategically, that could work. Morally, you have issues. Game-wise, you can't do that. Now hurry up and break the box and get out of there!"

"This game is stupid!"

"Don't you _dare_ say that!"

* * *

Suki concluded her tale (Iroh had wandered off somewhere in the midst of her rant) to Katara, who looked angry at her brother's actions.

"I knew he was stupidly male, but I didn't think he was so... Ugh!"

"I know, right?"

"You've yet to answer my question," said Toph, "Why'd you ask him all of a sudden? Is there a particular reason?"

"Well, I had a dream."

There was a pause.

"A... Dream?"

Suki nodded. "A dream."

Katara coughed politely while Toph just stared.

"I know what you're thinking." Suki straightened up. "But I'm serious. Dreams are a collective, symbolic message from one's sub-conscience that can portray needs and desires that you aren't even aware of."

"Oh?" Katara tilted her head slightly. This sounded interesting.

Toph, on the other hand, looked almost bored. Luckily, Suki didn't notice.

"Mmhm. So, I had this dream. I was in this field, right?"

Well, Toph thought, she supposed she was obligated (as both friend _and_ resident shrink) to listen to her tale of woe.

"Sokka was there, only he looked... different, but that doesn't matter. He was telling me something, but I couldn't hear what he was saying. I tried to tell him, but I couldn't. Then he was gone! Then you were there-"

"Me!" Katara pointed to herself, surprised.

"Yeah! You made all this water come up from the ground, and suddenly I was stuck in an iceberg, and I couldn't see. I-"

"How could you tell you were in an iceberg if you couldn't see?" Toph asked.

"I just... I just knew, you know? Anyway, I was stuck in this iceberg, and all of a sudden I _needed_ to get out, because I had to find this boy. And then I woke up." Suki fell silent, waiting for her friends to react.

"That was all?" Katara raised her eyebrow.

"Yeah."

"Who was the boy you needed to find?"

"Well, see, here's what I think. I couldn't talk to Sokka, and I couldn't hear what he was saying. That represented a lack of communication between us!"

Katara let out an "oh" of understanding, and Toph fought back the urge to roll her eyes.

"The water you made represented change, which is what happened to Sokka and I, and when I was trapped in the iceberg, it meant I was trapped in my own insecurities and I wasn't sure how to get out, since I couldn't see."

Katara nodded enthusiastically while Toph dug her pinkie around in her ear.

"I needed to find this boy. Well, that meant that I needed to find the boy who could help me escape the insecurity I was stuck in!" Suki concluded.

"That makes so much sense!" Katara exclaimed.

The two girls began discussing the details of her dream with excitement while Toph blew her bangs out of her face with an exhale. Trust Fangirl to almost break up with a guy because of some stupid dream. Her friends were a hideous mess, and she had her work cut out for her here.

* * *

"Don't you have any _normal_ games? Like... Oh, I don't know... Madden?"

"No. Now just use your senses to see the bug, dig at the spot where it's hiding, and then kill it with A."

"Can't I just wait for it to run out of oxygen or something?"

"No, it doesn't need it!"

"How? The physique clearly indicates that it's not adapted to an underground environment!"

Sokka stared at him.

"I, uh, I took advanced biology for a semester..."

"Oh... Well it's a cicada-type thing!"

"Oh."

Sokka grinned, the winner of the argument.

"This game is still dumb."

"Don't make me pour my water on you, _ponytail boy_!"

"That's only on really hot days! It's not even a real ponytail, it's just tied back!"

"It's feminine!"

"It's like, less than two inches long! And it's at the back of my neck, so it's still manly! And... Wait," Zuko turned to face him, "You wear your hair back in a ponytail _all_ the freaking _time_!"

"Sh-shut up, you... You pyromaniac!"

"You forgot what your own hair looked like, you moronic hypocrite!"

"Who you callin' moronic, Emo Boy?"

* * *

"So do you plan on forgiving him any time soon?" Toph asked, chugging down another cup of tea.

"No. Yes. Maybe. I don't know."

"Mm, now that that's cleared up..."

"I don't know." Suki frowned. "It all depends."

"On...?"

"Him."

"Him?"

"Him."

"What do you mean?" Katara asked.

"What he says."

"The next time you guys see each other?"

"Yup."

"Want me to talk to him for you?"

"That's alright, thanks. I want him to talk to me on his own accord. If not... Well, that's that."

"What do you mean that's that?"

"I mean, then we're not exactly an item. We'll be friends, I guess, but we're not going to be together."

Toph sighed. _Such_ a mess.

"What time is it, Sugar Queen?"

"About two. Wow, we've been here for a while! Do any of you have anywhere to be?"

"Nope."

"Not really, no."

"Where's Mr. Iroh?"

"Pops is over there playing some board game with an old guy."

"Over where?" Suki looked around them, trying to find him.

"Behind the table with the two big dudes."

"I think I see him." Katara said, standing up slightly.

"Wow, Toph! How did you see him?" Suki leaned in, interested.

"Didn't I tell you? Vibrations."

"Whoa... So... Do you have 360 degree vision or something?"

"I... I guess? I don't know..."

"How did you feel his vibrations?" It was Katara this time. "He's sitting down."

"The guy next to him keeps shifting his weight. So I can... Kinda use _his_ vibrations to see Pops. Oh, and he's mumbling under his breath, too."

"Wow, I didn't know your senses were so acute..."

Toph wasn't sure if she liked or disliked talking about her... "ability." Sure, Twinkletoes asked all the time, but with he never _stopped_ asking questions. Eventually she stopped thinking about them and just answered. She decided to change the subject.

"So, Sweetness! Your hatred for Sparky! You plan on forgiving him any time soon?"

Katara pursed her lips. "No."

"Why not? Unlike Snoozles, Sparky's actually apologizing!"

"Yeah!" Suki added, nodding. "And he's hot, too. Even the scar makes him all... tough-looking. Wonder how he got that anyway..."

"Suki, have you forgotten that you're kind of taken already?"

"What's wrong with a little window shopping as long as I shop at one store? Besides, I might not even be frequenting said store anymore, so I might as well... broaden my horizons."

"This is so very, very wrong. He was a jerk to me, and besides," Katara sniffed. "He's not that good looking anyway."

"What? Seriously? Have you looked at him before?"

"Yeah!" Toph chimed in. Okay, so she didn't know what he looked like. But he was her friend-almost-brother, and she would support him in every case. Also, it was a lot of fun bothering Sweetness. How could she be expected to be sympathetic all the time if it was so fun messing with her friend?

"You guys, I feel very uncomfortable talking about this."

"Is it because of the scar?" Toph pointed an accusatory finger towards her, intent on making her uncomfortable.

"Wh-what? No!"

"Then what?"

"I just don't find him attractive. At all."

"You may not find him attractive," Suki said sagely, "But do you find him hot?"

"What's the difference?"

"They're totally different! Example: I don't think Sokka's hot, but I think he's attractive."

"I don't think about that kind of stuff."

"Come ooon. Okay, even if you don't like his face, for some reason, what about his body?"

"Wh-what?"

"I concur. I've felt his biceps before." Toph supplemented, smiling evilly. "I know for a fact that it's something you don't need to feel to notice."

"Yeah, I've noticed too! I wonder if he works out..." Suki noticed her friend's steadily increasing discomfort and continued. "In fact, I wonder if the rest of his body's as worked as his arms..."

"I've never noticed." Katara insisted. Toph heard a light, almost undetectable lilt in her voice, and _knew_.

Katara had _lied_.

Toph grinned and opened her mouth to expose her but stopped herself. Wait. Sugar Queen had lied about noticing Sparky's hotness. Which meant that Sugar Queen _had_ noticed Sparky's hotness. Which meant Sugar Queen was _interested_ in Sparky's hotness. Which meant she _wasn't_ interested in Twinkletoes! Oh no. Oh no, oh no, oh no.

"_Curse you, Sparky, and your hot body_!" Toph cried to the heavens, throwing her arms up in despair.

The patrons of the store all turned to stare at her, and Katara and Suki's jaws dropped. Toph sat back down in her seat, oblivious to the attention she'd drawn to herself, and folded her hands together demurely.

"So, Sugar Queen. You were talking about how despicable Sparky is?"

"Toph, should we-"

"_How despicable Sparky is_?"

Katara caught the hint.

"Um, yes. Zuko. He's, uh, very despicable."

"I agree!" Toph exclaimed, "His despicableness knows no bounds, the crook!"

She leaned towards Katara and pointed.

"In fact, I can think of hundreds, nay, millions of people who have higher moral standards than him!" She began counting on her fingers, "There's you, Fangirl, Pops, Harry Potter, the Baudelaires, Dr. Who, and Twinkletoes! Oh, don't even get me started on Twinkletoes! He's just the best, don't you agree? He's nice, smart, attractive... One must say that he's a really good catch! What do you think, Sweetness? Don't you agree?"

"Uh... Sure, Toph."

Yes! She'd bought herself some more time. All she had to do was limit interactions between Sweets and Sparky, slip that love potion to her and Twinkles, and hope it worked. No- it _will_ work! It _had_ to!

But what if it didn't? Hmm.

She had to test it out on someone. But who? She had to be careful, too. If it _did_ work, she didn't want to cause unnecessary trouble (regular trouble was totally fine, but completely messing with someone's emotions wasn't). She wouldn't want to end up making Sparky fall in love with Pops or something creepy-nasty like that.

Wait. That's it! There was her solution!

No, not make him fall in his uncle, you creep. Sparky was her answer! All she had to do was feed it to him and a third party, and see what would happen. But who? Not herself, that was for sure. Not only was he like her brother to her, she wasn't planning on getting into any stupid romantic lovey type crap. Hmm...

This would be a lot easier if she knew more people. Darn you, Mom and Dad, for locking me away for so long. Darn you.

... Smellerbee...?

... Nah, they don't even know each other. How was she going to get them together? And she was fairly certain (not 100% positive) that she had a thing for that Longshot guy. Hmm. Maybe another guy...?

Nah. Messing with people's emotions was bad enough; messing with their sexuality was even worse. Well then, she'd have to _meet_ someone! Toph turned around in her seat, and faced a woman who was sipping coffee at the table behind them.

"Excuse me?"

The woman looked up, along with Katara and Suki.

"Me?"

"Yes. What's your name?"

"... June... Why?"

"Are you in a relationship right now?"

June arched an eyebrow.

"No..."

"Would you like to be?"

June studied the (blind?) girl before her, taking in her dark hair (it'd look gorgeous down), her pale skin (softer than hers, most likely) and glassy, gray eyes (with a hint of green, when the light hit it the right way). Good looking, June thought with an internal sigh, but unfortunately too young. Meanwhile, Katara and Suki gaped. Was there something in the tea or something? A splash of cactus juice or other inebriating liquids?

"Sorry, kid. I don't do jailbait. Wait a few more years, and, well... Maybe..." June winked, not caring if she saw or not.

Toph blushed.

"No, no, no, not me! The male in question is about twenty."

"Oh. Pity. I'm still going to have to say no, though. Don't do random blind-dates."

"Darn. Well, thank you for your time."

"No problem."

Toph turned back to her friends, and June went back to her coffee.

"Are you feeling alright?" Suki asked worriedly.

"I'm fine! I just thought Sparky could use... A date. Yeah."

"I give up," Katara said. "There's no use trying to keep up with you."

"She's really pretty." Suki said, pouting in envy. "Her hair is to die for. And look at her skin! So smooth-looking..."

"What were we talking about, again?" Toph drummed her fingers on the table.

"I don't remember." Katara twirled a lock of her hair (one of the two that framed her face at all times) around her finger absentmindedly.

"Yeah, we were slightly distracted at the possibility of you asking a girl out."

Toph turned red again. Goddamn it, she _hated_ blushing.

"I don't swing that way." she tried to keep her voice calm.

"Well, to be fair, you've never exactly shown any interest towards the opposite sex..." Katara smiled. Now it was _her_ turn to tease.

"N-neither have you!"

"No, there was Jet back in the old days." Katara grinned triumphantly. "Unless there's some past history _you'd_ like to share?"

"No..." She wasn't sure if she was embarrassed at the lack of "history" or frustrated that she had no defense. "I guess... I guess Sokka's kind of sort of not-really but pretty attractive?"

Wow. She had actually said that. Toph, you're a buffoon. She sat still, trying to gauge Suki's reaction. The older girl surprisingly didn't seem to care.

"Meh. She's allowed to window-shop, too!" Suki said simply, shrugging a bit.

"Woow... Sokka? Really?" Katara forgot that she was teasing, more fascinated than anything.

"Well, I don't like-like him or anything. He's just... I dunno. He's funny, I guess?"

"So it's not a crush, it's... 'slight attraction?'"

"Sure."

* * *

Sokka sneezed mid-sentence.

"Come on, come on," Zuko urged, pounding away at the buttons on the controller. "You fire an arrow at the crystal on his forehead, put on the boots, and then what?"

"Geez, pardon me, your Highness, for not having control over my sinuses. You run behind him and _then_ put on the boots, pull the chains and knock him to the ground."

"..."

"..."

"Okay, now what?"

"Now take off the boots, run to his head, and start slicing away at the crystal."

"..."

"..."

"Blasted game..."

* * *

"Alrighty... So you want to go home now?" Suki said, downing the rest of her tea.

"Sure." Katara stood up and stretched. "It's been like... four hours or so."

"Toph, I'll drop you off first."

"Alrighty, Fangirl. Just let me finish off the rest of the potstickers."

"Ooh, save one for us, Toph!"

"Nooo, mine!"

"Share!"

* * *

"And here is where I leave you, my apprentice."

"What? Why?"

"Sorry, dude, but the Water Temples in the Zelda games are notoriously difficult. I had to go online to figure out how to do it."

"Can't you help me? At all? Look at this place! It's a goddamn maze!"

"I believe in you, man!"

Before Zuko could retaliate, the two heard the front door open.

"Sokka, I'm home-"

Katara stopped. Zuko was sitting on her sofa. Zuko. There was a long silence, interrupted by the door shutting and the music from the TV. More silence. Sokka took a long slurp from his drink, still staring wide-eyed at his sister. Without saying another word, she stomped past the shocked boys and into her room. She slammed the door, locked it, and jumped on the bed, screaming into her pillow.

Zuko started to get up, stopped, paused the game, and went after her. Sokka decided that now was a nice time to disappear and stealthily tiptoed out the front door.

"Katara!" he yelled, knocking on the door. "Open the door!"

She yelled back at him, either a "No" or a "Fuck you," it was too muffled to tell. She might have been telling him to come on in, for all he knew.

"Katara," He hesitated before continuing. "P-Please. Will you at least hear me out?"

He said it. The dreaded P-word. He took her silence as a "yes" and continued.

"I'm sorry about what I said. I was a dick, and I was being stupid. Will you p... please forgive me?"

Again! Had she known him better, she might have known just how momentous an occasion this was. He was surprised when the door swung open and she was standing there, looking more tired than angry. "That's good... I think." he said to himself. Before she could speak, he put a hand up, indicating that he had more to say.

"I was a jerk, and I want to make it up to you." Time to take out his trump card. If this didn't work... Well, he was back to square one, and Toph was wrong, for once. He had nothing to lose. "Here."

Zuko held up a necklace, its blue stone glimmering softly in the light from Katara's bedroom.

Her mother's necklace.

* * *

_*Ring*_

_*Ring*_

_*Ring*_

"Hello?"

"Twinkletoes! I bring news! Are you busy?"

"Uh, hi, Toph! I'm not really doing anything right now," Aang lied, dropping his pencil and moving away from the essay he'd been working on. "What's up?"

"Don't lie to me! This is a bad time, isn't it?"

How did she do that?

"I was working on some homework, but it's fine, I could use a break. What is it?"

"You're such a goody-two shoes. Everybody knows that homework is for Sunday nights. Anyway, I bear news!"

"Mmhm?"

"Okay, so, you know Ka- I mean, the girl you like?"

He felt a brief rush of adrenaline that died down almost immediately. Oh yeah. That nonexistent girl Toph though he liked.

"Uhh... Yeah?"

"Well, I talked to her today,"

What?

"- And I bought something that will solve your problems for good!"

Who did she talk to? Who did she think it was?

"Err, what did you buy?"

"A love potion."

There was a brief pause. Aang was incredulous.

"..."

Toph waited.

"... I'm sorry, what did you say?"

"A love potion." She repeated.

He wasn't sure whether to laugh (a love potion? Her? How- Where- What-) or cry (Oh God she was planning something illegal, he just knew it). He chose the former. He threw his cellphone on his bed and ran outside the room (he wasn't sure how good Toph's hearing was and he wasn't about to take any risks) and erupted into loud laughter, his voice ringing with mirth.

Toph waited some more. All she'd heard was a thump-noise followed by silence. Was he dead?

"... Are you dead?"

Silence. She would take that as a "No."

She waited some more. Finally, Aang composed himself and returned, picking up the phone nonchalantly.

"Hello?"

"Aren't you going to say anything?"

"Uh, not really."

"Good. If you laughed at me, I would have been displeased."

Aang mumbled incoherently under his breath before continuing.

"So. A love potion."

"You don't sound very enthusiastic."

"Well, how do you know it'll work?"

"That's part of my ingenious plan! I'll use it on someone else, first!"

"Oh? Who might that be?"

"I'm thinking about Sparky, but I'm not sure about who with."

Aang grinned, rolling his eyes. He'd go along with this; it sounded fun!

"What about Suki?"

"Hmm... Yeah! That might actually work! She's having a fall out with Snoozles, and she could use a rebound! Plus she said that Sparky's hot... Yeah! Yeah, that would work! Thank you, Second-in-Command Plotter General!"

"No problem, Head Plotter. Now... May I ask who you think the mystery girl is?"

"Huh?"

"You know. The girl you think I like?"

"You mean the girl I _know_ you like!"

"How do you know?"

Good question...

"Well, Twinkletoes, could you describe her in greater detail?"

He turned red.

"She's kind, and really tough at the same time. She's smart, funny, and a lot prettier than she's willing to admit." _It's you, it's you, it's you, it's you..._

Toph thought about it carefully.

"Does she wear her hair up all the time?" she asked, picturing Katara in her mind.

Aang's heart skipped a beat. "Yes..."

"Have little to no romantic interests towards guys?"

"Yes!"

"Pretty good friends with you?"

"Yeah!"

"Then yes, I know who it is!"

"Really?" He asked, grinning.

"Yup! And trust me, Twinkles, once I find out if this potion works and I manage to slip this into her drink while she's not looking, you two are going to be so sweet together I'm going to get diabetes."

"... Hold on a second."

Aang put the phone on his bed and began slamming his head on the desk repeatedly.

* * *

"How... Where... Where did you get that." Katara said slowly, not taking her eyes off the necklace in his hand.

"Umm..." Zuko rubbed the back of his neck. He hadn't thought of a good excuse. "I knew you were really, really mad at me, so I thought if I got you something..."

"That's mine."

"I- wait, what?"

"That's mine!" she repeated, louder this time. "You're the one who took it from me! It was _you_ all along!"

She snatched the necklace from his hand and slammed the door in his face.

"Get out!" she screamed, crying more out of anger and frustration than anything. "Don't ever come back!"

Zuko snapped out of his stupor.

"What is wrong with you?" he yelled. "It's just a goddamn necklace! It's not like I _stole_ it from you!"

"How did you get it, then?"

"I just- It was in my-" he sputtered, indignant. "I didn't steal it, alright? Why the hell would I? _Why_ are you making such a big deal out of this? _It's just a necklace_!"

"It's not _just_ a necklace," Katara abruptly opened the door, nearly tearing it off its hinges.

Zuko's eyes widened when he saw her, her face red and tears streaking down her cheeks. Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, crying girl, shit, shit shit... What to do, what to do, what to do... He quickly snapped back to attention.

"It was my mother's. I spent _so_ long looking for it, and now you have the gall to- to- Oh never mind..."

Katara shut the door again and slumped to the ground, her back against the door. Zuko, remembering what Sokka had said about their mother, stood there, unsure of what to do.

"You wouldn't know what it's like," Katara said finally, her voice muffled. "having to lose a mother."

He stood there for a few more seconds before sighing and sitting down, his back against the door as well. He thought for a few minutes before speaking again.

"I'm sorry."

She sniffed but didn't reply, surprised by the genuine tone in his voice.

"I... I know how you feel." Another sigh. "My mother... She died, too."

Katara's eyes widened in shock, her thoughts coming to a complete crash.

"Oh." She almost slapped herself. "Oh,"? Was that the best she could do? Regret mingled with guilt as she sat there, suddenly hyper-aware of his presence behind the thin, wooden door. She hadn't known that...

"I'm sorry, too." Katara rubbed the stone of the necklace. "About being such a jerk, I mean. I didn't know that. I shouldn't have assumed anything. And I shouldn't have yelled at you while you were trying to make amends."

"I should be the one apologizing."

"You already have."

Katara blinked the remaining tears out of her eyes, determined not to cry anymore. Zuko stared straight ahead, wondering what she was thinking about.

"When did she...?" Zuko asked tentatively, trailing off. He bit his tongue when she didn't answer.

"I'm sorry, that was too personal, I-"

"No, it's fine. I... I was five, at the time. She had cancer."

"I'm s-"

"Don't say you're sorry. It... It's not like it was your fault."

They fell into another, more peaceful silence. Katara absentmindedly fingered the carpet. Eventually the curiosity overwhelmed her.

"What about you?" she asked.

Zuko didn't speak for a while.

"Fire." he said finally, sounding tense. "I was twelve." He didn't say anything else.

"I-"

"I don't want you to apologize, either."

"Alright."

"Alright."

They sat there a bit longer, thinking.

"So..."

"Hmm?"

"What does this mean? About us, I mean. Wow, that sounded really awkward. I mean-"

"I know what you meant. Does this mean we're friends now, or do we go back to throwing snarky comments and thinly veiled insults at each other in a semi-friendly kind of way?"

Katara frowned.

"Well, when you say it like _that_..."

"I have a talent for speaking uncomfortable truths."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"... Well?"

"... How about something in between?"

"That sounds good."

"Good."

She heard Zuko stand up and head down the hallway.

"Where are you going?" she asked, standing up and opening the door.

"Your stupid brother got me into Twilight Princess. Want to help with the water temple?"

"Sure. Just... Just give me a few seconds to make myself more presentable." Katara was suddenly painfully aware of her red eyes and her tear-streaked face.

"Alright. Don't take too long, _Sugar Queen_." He said sarcastically, before turning away.

"Whatever, _Sparky_."

Things were back to normal... Whatever normal was. Katara wiped her face as best as she could and carefully put the necklace around her neck before heading to the living room.

* * *

What was Sokka doing during this brief repose?

He went across the street and ordered some dango, and then a pie.

That's it.

When he returned home, he was pleasantly surprised to see Zuko playing Legend of Zelda while Katara yelled instructions at him. And by pleasantly surprised, I mean "Hey, they're being platonic _and_ not killing each other! What a pleasant surprise!"

"Hey! You guysh 'r bean plutonic 'nd not killin' easch ovver!" Sokka exclaimed, chewing voraciously on some dango. "What a pleash'nt shurprishe!"

"... What?"

"Sokka, that's just nasty, cut that out."

He gulped loudly and continued.

"Sorry, sis. I said you guys are being friendly. I didn't expect that."

"Friendly my ass." Zuko grumbled.

Katara hmphed. "I'd be friendlier if you just listened to me when I'm speaking."

"First you say to avoid to get out of the water because of the zombie fish. Next you tell me to get in the water to throw the switch. And then what happens? _No switch, and I get eaten by zombie fish_."

"I specifically told you to dive into the body of water in the _left_!"

"No, you said to dive into the body of water in the _west_."

"Why would I say that? There's zombie fish in the west!"

They continued to bicker while Sokka nonchalantly sat on the table and ate.

* * *

"... Which is why, eventually, I swore off smoking. But enough about me, Twinkletoes, tell me more about yourself!"

"Hahaha, smoking... I'm sorry, what?"

"Haha, yeah, it was funny, wasn't it... What was I saying- Oh right. Tell me more about yourself!"

"Like what?"

"I dunno. What does your grandpa do?"

"What do your parents do?"

"I dunno. Something involving stocks? I don't really care, either. Answer the question!"

"He's a college professor."

"I knew it, nerdism is genetic. I must add this to my notes. What subject?"

"World religions."

"Tenured?"

"Yup."

"That's awesome. Tell me more about Gramps."

"Umm... he's kind of eccentric. He's really into old stuff, and anything New Age related."

"What do you mean?"

"Like... Last week he got really into yoga..."

Both of them winced at the mental images.

"And before then he got into crystal healing, then aromatherapy..."

"That all sounds really girly... No offense."

"Nah, I agree. Sometimes he makes me join him in his obsessions."

"Ooh, did _you_ do yoga?" Toph grinned wickedly.

Her smile widened when he didn't answer.

"Okay, change of topic." Aang said before she could speak.

"Alrighty, fine. What's your grandpa's latest craze?"

"Old Asian mythology. He got a bunch of rare manuscripts and scrolls for his collection, recently."

"Wow... Is your grandpa rich?"

"He's tenured, and he's... _somewhat _famous. He goes around giving conferences and speeches and whatnot. But he's very... minimalist, so he doesn't spend money on anything other than to increase his collection of old, useless, expensive stuff. It stinks, honestly... We have millions of dollars worth of things, and we sleep in the living room on futons."

"All that stuff sounds really interesting, though. I want to visit, sometime!"

"It _is_ pretty interesting, at times," Aang admitted. "Although I don't know if anyone can just..."

"Come ooon, Twinkles! I'll be nice, really!"

"That's not what I-"

"I promise not to touch or ruin anything. Not even your futons."

"But I-"

"Thanks, Twinkletoes! You're the best. Do Tuesdays work out for you?"

"Tuesdays are fine." Aang rolled his eyes. "I suppose I _could_ show you around. I don't know where to begin, though."

"Start out with the most recent! You said he got some five bajillion-year old scrolls, right?"

"Yeah. They're really old, but I can read most of the calligraphy in some of them. They're really interesting myths."

"Whoa, he actually lets you handle those things?"

"Oh, geez, no! But he does give me translated copies."

"Read one of them!"

"Wh- Right now?"

"Yeah!"

"Uh, alright, just give me a second."

There was the sound of drawers opening and closing and the shuffling of paper before he returned.

"Hello?"

"Still here!"

"Uh, okay, so... There's the one about the Moon Lady and the Archer from China, the one about the Sun goddess, Amaterasu, from Japan, the story of Savitri and Satyavan from India, and Other."

"Other?"

"Other." Aang smiled.

"What's Other?" Toph could tell he'd wanted her to ask.

"It's really interesting, actually. It's written in Chinese calligraphy, but the source is unknown."

"What do you mean 'unknown?' It's in Chinese, it's from China!"

"That's the thing, though. It's an 'exclusive' myth, only popular, and even heard of, in only a few places in China. Grandpa thinks it was a less popular myth that originated in small villages."

"Weird. What's it about?"

"It's a series of stories about all these gods and mythological figures. The Moon Spirit, what appears to be a different interpretation of Agni, and this being called the Avatar."

"Tell me about that one!"

"Which one?"

"The Ava-whatsit."

"It says here that the Avatar was an incarnation of the spirit world that manifested itself in human form in the material world, during the Age of Avatars during the time of the elements."

"What's the time of the elements?"

"I... I don't know."

"Pooh. Continue!"

"Ahem. The Avatar couldn't die, but instead be reincarnated as a being from a different nation. This part's kind of weird."

"What do you mean weird?"

"It talks about the different nations real quick, but it's messed up in translation or something, it doesn't make a lot of sense. I'm guessing it's metaphorical. It talks about the Land of Fire, the Land of Earth, the Land of Air and the Land of Water."

"It probably makes sense in Chinese."

"Yeah, probably. I'm assuming the lands were divided into different countries or something, because it implies that those were the only lands in the entire world."

"Yeah, yeah, okay, continue!"

"Right. Ahem, so, the Avatars were powerful leaders, spreading peace and prosperity throughout the land. They were the only ones who could bend all of the elements-"

"What?"

"What?"

"You said bend all of the elements. Like, he could control the elements?"

"I'm not sure. It literally says 'bending' the elements. Not 'control.' It probably means he or she was very in-tune with nature. Don't forget, Toph, it's just a myth!"

"Right. Well, it'd be way cooler if he could control the elements."

"That's just ridiculous."

"But super mega awesome!"

"Do you want me to read this or not?"

"My lips are sealed!"

"Alright." Aang cleared his throat before continuing. "The Avatars implemented an era of peace. But things changed during the time of Sozin, who reigned over the flames..."

* * *

**To be continued next time on AVATAR Z.**

**No. Not really. **

**But it shall be continued! Sorry for not much action this chapter, but things will pick up later! Leave a review!**


	10. ROLL GOAL

**WHOA NELLY, I LIVE.**

**I'm really sorry, it's been, what, a year? I have no excuses; I just stopped caring about the fic, and Avatar in general, but I'm back now? Please don't murder me D: By now I'm guessing no one remembers the original plot, so just remember that there is none. Thank you for your patience, and please leave concrit in your reviews! If you wish to flame me, please stick with flames about my inability to update regularly.**

* * *

Day 46

Toph woke up with her shrill alarm clock slowly decimating her eardrums. Ugh. _School_. What an ugly, disgusting word.

True, it was better than staying at home all day with Kuei monologuing about the beauty of geometry, but at least she could talk to him or at least prank him once in a while!

Most teachers here were strict, impersonal, and didn't really seem to be the type to tolerate her mischievous hijinks.

... Did she just use use the term "mischievous hijinks?"

She was more tired than she'd thought.

Welp, no sense in lying around. Time to seize the day... Or however that saying went. With a small grunt, Toph hoisted herself away from her (silk, imported from India) blankets and hopped off her mattress (stuffed with swan down), her long hair pointing in all directions and making her head look like a giant ball of fuzz. She meandered to her closet and grabbed a shirt and pants. Her wardrobe consisted of two colors: green (from what she'd heard, grass was green and grass was on the ground and she _liked_ ground) and black (it's a manly color).

Now, I _could_ tell you about how she went to breakfast and quietly crushed her (silver) spoon in her fist as her parents slowly pissed her off with their coddling and cooing (my gosh, she was _sixteen_, not _four_!). I _could_ tell you about how she went on the bus and went through her classes in that slouchy, depressed manner that one can't help but have on Mondays... But I won't. So let's cut to the relevant stuff, shall we? Our story picks up again sometime during fourth period...

* * *

Toph was a bit anxious. Just a bit. If you will remember, Katara had basically assaulted Tomo (Genus: Assus holius) on Friday. Tomo, being the wiener-jacket he was, was sure to inform the principal of how the Honor Roll student had attacked him. Toph was tense throughout all her classes, listening, listening, listening for an announcement calling Katara to the office. She didn't want her to get in trouble, and so was both pleased and surprised when _she_ was called to the office instead.

"Will Toph Bei Fong please report to the principal's office in Room 2014?"

Ms. Macmu Ling pursed her lips in disapproval. First that irritating senior (Sokka, was it?) had the gall to disagree with her about the beauty of the haiku, and now her class was being interrupted _again_! She turned to the child in question, not bothering to hide her glare.

"Well, Miss Bei Fong. Please go on ahead. _Silently_." she said sharply.

"Yes ma'am."

God, that lady could use her voice to chop vegetables. Toph quickly gathered her things (the period was almost over, anyway) and headed out the door.

"Hmph. Now, class, as I was saying. How does the pentameter in this piece attributes to the overall somber tone of the poem? Yes, Miss Hanabi? An interesting theory, although it's important to note that the author's message may have been attributed to the fact that his mother was _not_ a member of the proletariat..."

* * *

Katara herself had jumped when she heard the announcement; she had been tense all day, fearing the inevitable moment in which she would be kicked off the Honor Roll. Or given a detention! Or a suspension! Both horrible marks on her clean record... Or worse! She could be expelled!

So when Toph had been the one to get sent to the office, she wasn't sure what to feel. Was Toph in trouble?

Oh well. It probably was a negligible matter, anyway.

... Still, she hoped the younger girl was alright.

"Miss Bei Fong, do you know why you are here today?" said Principal Roku, staring at her gravely.

"No, sir, I do not." She bit back the sarcastic comment forming in her head. Something about the man made things very... serious. She couldn't help but respect him.

"Actually, I think you do. This morning, a student came to my office and told me some distressing news."

Wow, this morning? And here she'd thought Tomo would have run to someone over the weekend. But what did this have anything to do with _her_?

"Miss Bei Fong, I will be very straightforward with you. A student informed that you had assaulted him on Friday."

Toph's jaw fell.

What?

What?

...

What?

"Excuse me?" she said aloud.

Principal Roku did not blink.

"Now, I hope you are aware that this is your third offense against the _same_ student. I do not know what sort of grudge you have against him, and it is time you learned that such actions will not be tolerated, especially not in this school. We have been exceedingly lenient towards you due to your parents' standing, but rest assured, Mr. Ze Tian's family will have much to say on the matter."

Toph had zoned out somewhere around "Now I hope you are aware." Her mind was still reeling from this new bit of information.

What?

What?

Whaaaat?

Tomo had said that _she_ hit him?

Why? Had that blow to the gut addled his memory- no, no, no, wait. That was impossible- she wasn't exactly an expert in biology, but she was _pretty_ sure that taking a hit to the stomach couldn't affect your brain.

Also, Tomo had a last name? Huh. She'd always suffixed his name with "the asshole," so she hadn't really considered that. How sad; Ze Tian was an alright last name, and "Tomo" didn't match up to it in the slightest. Didn't sound nice together at all. Maybe _that's_ why he's such a douchebag! He was scarred as a child from having such a dumb name! Boy, his parents had to be reeeal idiots to pair the two-

_Concentrate!_

Figure out what's going on. There has to be a logical explanation as to why she had been blamed. Sure, she was glad that Katara wasn't in trouble, but she was also positive that he had seen her hit him. How couldn't he have? It's hard not to miss someone slamming a walking stick into one's torso.

So what had happened? What was going on?

_He must not have seen the incident clearly_, said a voice that sounded suspiciously like Sparky. _His two brain cells rubbed together for a few hours and eventually formed a coherent thought that blamed you for the pain in his torso._

Toph grit her teeth together, forcing back a chuckle. As funny as the theory was, Tomo wasn't stupid... In the intellectual sense. So what was the deal... Maybe he had a bigger grudge on her than she'd initially suspected? Well, there was only one way to find out. She had to ask Tomo.

"... Along with writing a formal apology to his family. Do you understand, Miss Bei Fong?"

"Uh, yes sir."

"Very well. You may leave. But remember; this is but a light slap to the wrist. Your family is held in high esteem here, especially after their generous donation when you first were enrolled, but next time I will be _much_ more... strict."

Toph shuddered as she left the office. Talk about your dangerous voices. He and Ms. Ling should hook up. Their kids could cause earthquakes just by yawning. Also, what the heck was her punishment, again? Something involving a letter or something.

Whatever. First thing's first.

She was finding Tomo, and she was going to get to the bottom of this and kick his ass.

Although, perhaps not necessarily in that order.

* * *

Aang stared blankly at the chalkboard, feeling very... out of it.

He'd spent a great deal of time reading to Toph, and consequently, had to stay up late finishing his essay.

He'd _never_ stayed up doing homework! Well, not that he'd regretted talking to her or anything.

Aang rubbed his eyes and fought to stay awake, his mind lingering at yesterday's phone call rather than the lecture he was supposed to be taking notes on...

* * *

"_The Avatars implemented an era of peace. But things changed during the time of Sozin, who reigned over the flames_-"

"What do you mean?" said Toph, sitting on her bed and feeling around for a chocolate covered pretzel in her Gigantic Bowl of Fattening Foods.

"I think it just means that he was a warmonger. You know, spreading destruction everywhere? Fire?"

"Oh. Darn, I still think it'd be cooler if they could control fire, don't you?"

"Science says that's impossible."

"Science is boring."

Aang rolled his eyes, but smiled despite himself. "Fine, they could control fire!"

"Awright!" Toph bounced lightly on her bed, feeling very pleased with herself. "Sparky never let me make stuff up."

"I- Wait, Sparky? Like, Zuko? What does Zuko have anything to do with this?"

But Toph was still talking.

"... shoot it out of their fists and stuff! Aww man, wouldn't that be so cool, making your own fire! It'd be convenient, too. Ooh ooh ooh, and not just fire! Other people can do other stuff! Like control earth! Man, I should totally become a writer. I'm telling you, dude, this stuff is gold. If we were to make a franchise out of this, you know how many fans we'd get? A lot. Okay, sorry, continue!"

"Err, alright." Aang cleared his throat before continuing.

"So, _Sozin began battle against the other nations. Earth was forced into submission, Water was torn apart, and Air disappeared from the face of the planet._"

"... What? Like... Atlantis?"

"I think it means- Wait, _Atlantis_?"

"Yeah! You know, that big city with all the cool stuff that disappeared because of a flood? Disappeared off the _face of the earth_? And then that Disney movie came out that I, obviously, couldn't see but it had to do with Atlanteans still being alive and stuff?"

"I... I have no idea what you're talking about."

"But believe me when I say I'm right. This is totally like Atlantis. Or maybe it means there really was no air, and no one could breathe. But if water was torn apart, that means there was a heck of a lot of hydrogen and oxygen around, which means that there _was_ air!"

"... I'm so lost right now that I'm going to pretend that I didn't hear you and reread the sentence."

"Gotcha."

"So, _Sozin began battle against the other nations. Earth was forced into submission, Water was torn apart, and Air disappeared from the face of the planet. Though some still fought, it seemed as though Fire had at last conquered the world. Hope ceased to exist, and only with the Avatar could the world achieve balance. But the Avatar of the time had been lost, locked away in a prison of chilled glass, accompanied only by his familiar. His body and mind didn't age, protected by the wisdom of thousands of Avatars past_-"

"I'm lost now, too."

"Which part threw you off?"

"The last two sentences. What does that even mean? Chilled glass? His familiar? What?"

"Umm... He was held up somewhere, and he only had his pet to hang out with."

"Oh, that makes sense."

With another clearing of his throat, Aang continued.

"_Time passed, and after an Age, the Avatar's prison of cold waters was shattered by two siblings from the ends of the world. The two siblings of Water were the first to find the Savior, and the Maiden, using the waves, freed him from his age-old cell. Together, the brother and sister took Him to their home on the ice. However-_"

"Wait, wait, wait." Toph interrupted. "I thought you said this story took place in China."

Aang paused to adjust the phone on his shoulder and frowned in confusion.

"Yeah, it does. Well, the story can be traced back to China, anyway."

"So why does it have people living on the Poles?" Toph asked gravely.

"Wait- What?"

"It said they had homes on the ice at the ends of the world!"

Aang tried not to laugh.

"It probably meant that they lived in the mountains or something, Toph."

"Oh." She blew a strand of hair out of her face. Damn it. She'd thought she had found out something important. "You may continue."

"Okay." With a clear of the throat, he began again.

"_However, the Lost Prince, who was forsaken by his father the Fire Lord, sought to destroy the Savior for reasons known only to him..._"

* * *

Aang felt himself fall asleep again, and immediately straightened up.

Although he didn't regret reading to Toph, he would have to find a way to do so at an earlier hour.

He was about to go mad.

* * *

Toph stomped through the hallways, her senses straining for any sort of sign of her target. Students dove out of her way (and her haphazardly swinging cane) as she marched, a silver fire burning behind her green-gray eyes. Yes, they recognized the tell-tale signs. They understood the meaning behind the jut of her chin, her locked jaw, her furrowed brows.

Someone was going to be badly hurt.

And understandably so, for Toph was in a Bad Mood.

Though she was pleased that Katara would not get in trouble for her actions, she was still pissed at the fact that she had avoid physically harming Tomo for the rest of the year, and that she had to write him and his family a letter. A freaking _letter_.

Not an email, no!

Not a casual text!

Not even a God-damn phone call!

She had to make a legitimate, polite, _formal_ letter of apology.

She almost gagged.

If anything, they should have been writing a letter to _her_.

True, she sent him to the hospital once or twice, but he _insulted_ her!

And now things were worse; not only was she spending her lunch period hunting down That Asshole instead of talking to Katara, she was sure Tomo was up to something.

Toph was no fool; she knew whatever Tomo was planning had to be personally against Katara and her. Maybe even both! And the most likely plan was probably simple blackmail.

If Toph did not do what Tomo wished, Katara would be revealed as the true culprit, and would be punished accordingly.

A detention, hell, maybe even a suspension, was nothing more than bothersome to Toph. But to Katara... The ensuing panic attack wouldn't be pretty, that for sure she knew.

Now Toph was thinking rapidly while continuing her search.

Tomo probably knew Toph was banned from hurting him... Besides, with the information he carried, he probably knew she couldn't harm him. No, threats would not work. But what could she do?

It all depended on what he wanted, and that was precisely what she planned to find out. The faster she did, the faster she could come up with a plan.

The best possible outcome would be that he would continue being an enormous douche, and she could just grit her teeth and take her anger out on her students at the dojo. Unfortunately, this possibility was the most unlikely to occur.

He might also try to make her do something stupid and embarrassing, like wear an embarrassing outfit for a week, or give scented love letters to the ugliest teachers at school, or act as his personal towel-girl forever...

Toph snorted. He could go right ahead! She didn't care! He couldn't break her if he made her parade the school naked (which she seriously doubted he would, and okay fine she would be quite upset if she were forced to do that, but why does it even matter anyway after all it's just a hyperbole).

Finally, after reaching Hallway 5D, she felt Tomo's vibrations; he was talking to one of his equally stupid friends.

"Well," she thought to herself. "I guess I'll just have to cut the conversation short."

* * *

The student who Tomo had been speaking to just happened to glance behind his friend and see that the hallway was completely deserted; an odd occurrence, since it had been fairly congested just a few moments ago... Then he saw her.

Itty bitty, petite little Toph, who was stomping towards them with grit teeth and hellfire in her eyes, looking like some sort of fairy who was in the mood for castrating some males.

With wide eyes and a masculine "Meep!" the boy turned and sprinted out of there faster than you could say "namby pamby."

Tomo turned around and almost lost his eye when Toph whipped her cane at him.

"_Holy sh_- You can't hurt me, remember?" Tomo yelled in a panic.

But Toph hadn't had any intentions of harming him... At the moment. Instead, she was pointing at him with her walking stick.

"YOU."

"Uh, yeah?"

"Explain yourself!" she growled. "Do you remember what happened that day when your diaphragm was so intimately introduced to my walking stick?"

"Of course I do," Tomo said with a smirk, the arrogant tone slowly slipping back into his voice. "Your nerdy friend attacked me."

He jumped when the blind girl slammed her cane onto the ground, the sound echoing throughout the deserted hallway.

"You are the most pathetic ignoramus I have ever had the misfortune to meet," she spat. "I knew you remembered, I just knew it. I expect now that you want something from me. Well, for once, I am listening."

"Hmph. Not as stupid as I thought. You and me both know that your friend would probably kill herself if anything happened to her perfect record..."

"Hurry it up. I haven't got all day."

Tomo laughed.

"So feisty! I like you, you know."

She froze.

This conversation had suddenly gone in a most dangerous direction.

"No one else has the guts to say that kind of shit to me, and no one has ever gone so far to hit me before."

"Probably because no one wants to touch your nasty skin." She felt herself saying, not really aware of her own words.

Tomo continued on as though she hadn't said a word.

"It's probably because of your rich parents. You don't have to worry about a lawsuit from my family. That's probably it. No, I've got to say, you're very... _Interesting_."

"If you are implying what I think you're implying," Toph interrupted smoothly, "You'd best shut your face. Because what you're saying is impossible and stupid and I will probably smother you while you sleep if you continue."

Tomo scowled.

"I knew you wouldn't agree to it," he said with a frown.

"AGREE TO WHAT?" Toph screamed in her head, while appearing completely indifferent.

"But then again, that's the fun part, isn't it?" The smirk slipped back into his face. "I don't really give a damn whether you like me or not. In fact, I prefer if you didn't. What I want from you is _definitely_ not your... _approval_."

Toph bit the inside of her teeth, choking back a vitriolic comment.

"The Golden Dragon Dance is coming up soon, midget. It's simple. It's either you or your friend."

Toph forced out a laugh, trying to get rid of her nerves.

"You're an imbecile! You really think you can get away with this?"

"Um. Yeah!"

"Of course you would think so. You could count your IQ with one hand. You forget that my parents are the most paranoid people on this side of the planet, and they're not going to let me go anywhere with a guy... Especially not one as gross as you. And secondly," Toph pointed her cane dangerously close to his face again, forcing him to step back. "If you think Sugar- _Katara's_ going to be okay with the idea of me giving myself to you for the sake of a detention or two, you've got another thing coming."

Without another word, Toph spun on her heels and began walking in the other direction, her head held high. Despite the confidence in her stature, she focused all her attention on the shape of the lockers, the footsteps in adjacent classrooms... Anything except the boy behind her.

Her previous anger, wild and raging as it was, had been replaced by something much... Colder. She couldn't explain it, only embrace it. This kind of anger was more like steel.

She shook her head. An intense examination of her emotions could be done afterwards. First things first, she had to find Katara.

* * *

Fact: The news did not go over well.

Fact: Katara spent the short remainder of the period telling her that she would accept all punishments, Tomo could go burn in hell, and that Toph shouldn't even think about it.

Fact: Toph wasn't so sure. After all, she knew how sullen Katara became if she got anything less than a hundred percent on anything. A detention would kill her, and if she got a suspension... This idea she _did_ avoid thinking about.

Fact: Smellerbee did bring up spirits by telling Toph not to be fooled; Tomo was too big of an asshole to attract any female, and despite what he may say, he probably had nothing backing up his words.

Fact: The problem still lingered, and Toph decided that a good cup of tea was the best way to calm herself. An emergency meeting was organized at the Jasmine Dragon, and they would meet there that Wednesday.

* * *

Zuko: Sokka? Are you free today?

Sokka: ... Who are you?

Zuko: ? It's me, Zuko.

Sokka: Liar. Zuko never texts me first, and when he does, he never asks to hang out.

Zuko: Stop being stupid.

Sokka: Fine. So what's up, doc?

Zuko: Can I come over to your house?

Sokka: ... Who are you?

Zuko: I'm serious.

Sokka: lol I'm just kidding. But seriously, this is a surprise. May I ask what the deal is?

Zuko: Does it matter?

Sokka: Yes.

Zuko: ... Fine. I want to finish playing Legend of Zelda

Sokka: LMFAOOOO

Zuko: You know what? Fine. Forget this. Screw you.

Sokka: lol sorry man, I was just kidding, you can come over.

Sokka: Hello?

Sokka: Zuko?

Sokka: Oh come on, man, I said I was sorry!

Sokka: Zuuuuuuuukkoooooooooo.

Zuko: Stop. Texting. Me.

Sokka: Come ooon, are you coming over?

Zuko: I'll be there in ten minutes.

Sokka: Isn't it a twenty minute drive?

Zuko: My car can go faster.

Sokka: Your enthusiasm is scaring me. I hope to God you're not going to be going at unholy speeds again.

Sokka: Promise me you won't do that again.

Sokka: Zuko?

Sokka: Zuko?

Sokka: ... I'll prepare the bail money just in case.

* * *

Toph stared at the ceiling.

Well, okay, she didn't _stare_, as she couldn't exactly see anything, but _you know what I mean_.

Today's events had been... Weird.

Yes, weird.

It wasn't even alarming.

What Toph needed was a simple, logical plan.

Having grown up with Zuko, she was used to dealing with ridiculous deals, and had gotten out of it with ease. It was easy; when being blackmailed, or if you're being forced into a bargain, all you had to do was remove the other side's hold on you.

She remembered one time when Kuei had given her a choice of doing her math problems and throwing out all her ice cream, the solution had been simple. She'd burnt the math book in the living room fire, shoveling every carton of ice cream she owned down her throat as she watched the pages curl and blacken.

After the Snowcone Incident, Zuko had tied her to her bed with a jump-rope and told her she could either have her favorite radio out thrown out the fifth floor window, or she could promise never to do such a thing again. He hadn't expected her to squirm out of her bonds- gaining several rope burns and almost dislocating her shoulder- and lock the radio in the safe where her parents kept the family diamonds.

Come to think of it, he had been caught so far off guard by her actions (he'd been joking around when he'd tied her up, so the rope burns almost made his eyes pop out of his head) that he'd catered to her every whim for about a month afterwards.

She thought, "Good times..."

Focus! She had to focus.

What could she do to get out of this situation?

Katara's exclamations aside, Toph didn't want her to go through any troubles. She was uptight enough; she didn't need more on her plate. Some people made ridiculously huge deals out of small things; Suki her fans, Toph her mp3 players, and Katara her schoolwork. She couldn't blame her. No, Katara would not be getting in any trouble; this for sure was certain.

At the same time, there was no way in hell Toph was going any where near Tomo, unless she was causing him physical pain. He hadn't been too specific in his implications, but she could guess he didn't exactly plan on showering her with flowers or chocolates. Well, whoop de doo. She wasn't letting him touch her. This, too, was irrefutable.

So what could she do? Somehow she had to avoid having Tomo come near her, while making sure he didn't go through with his threat. Toph was stuck between a rock and a hard place, and she had to see if she had any room to wriggle out from there.

"Maybe I could get Sparky to threaten him." she mused. "I don't see why not. Or maybe I could brown-nose like mad in that stupid letter, and slip in somewhere that he's sexually harassing me. Or maybe I could freak out and say I'm pregnant, and have him carted off to another time zone."

She rolled over and reached for a Twix.

"Ugh!" she threw the wrapper into the air. "What kind of weirdo gets off at a chick who abuses him?"

Wait. No, there were a lot of people like that in the world. What were they called again? Mass-somethings.

She'd asked Zuko about it before... What was it called?

"Masochists!" she yelled out, pleased at having remembered.

Outside, the maid who had been bringing in the laundry fainted.

Toph cackled as she recalled that particular conversation.

* * *

(Frashbach)

"Hey, Sparky!"

"What's up, Champ?"

"Okay, so, remember the talk we had a few months ago?"

"Uh, which talk? We talk about a lot of things."

"No, no, no, _The Talk_," Toph had stressed.

Zuko paled.

"Oh. Right. That."

Granted, explaining the... _procedure_ in a scientific manner was much simpler than explaining the emotional aspects of everything, but it had still been an uncomfortable hour nonetheless.

"Well, do you also remember a few weeks back when you read to me?"

"... Which books?" He said, trying to avert the direction of the conversation. He realized his mistake too late.

"Come on, you remember, _Midnight Island: A Passionate Affair, The Gilt Mistress, Sunlight Longings, The Duke's Bedroom, _and there was a few more..."

"Yes I-"

"Oh yeah, it was: _Malibu Fun: Vodka, Bikinis and Scandals, A Collection of Cowboy Love Stories, When I Fell for My Boyfriend's Father, _and that one book from Japan, I forget the title... I think it was Ichi-something or another."

"I remember _quite well_." Zuko said, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Well, I bring you one more-"

"NO."

"It's-"

"NO."

"But-"

"NO.

"It'll be the last one, I _swear_!" Toph said, preparing to put on The Face.

"... You promise?"

Toph nodded enthusiastically, feeling the older boy's resolve weaken.

"And come on, you've read to me about squealing girls oiling down bodybuilders in Malibu, you've read to me about a girl lusting after 'rugged horse rustlers,' and about a girl who had an operation to become a man, found out her ex-boyfriend is gay and actually her current boyfriend's father, and slept with him after her boyfriend had an operation to become a woman. One more story won't hurt, right? I'm pretty sure you've gone through every ridiculous story in the library."

Though she couldn't see Zuko's cocked eyebrow, she could feel his trepidation.

"Pleeeeeeeease?"

"... Fine."

She smiled happily and handed him the book. Zuko took one look at the cover before throwing it to the other side of the room.

"What was that for?" Toph yelled, getting up and fetching the novel.

"Anything but that."

"What?"

"I SAID, ANYTHING BUT THAT."

"Ouch, keep it down. By 'what,' I meant more along the lines of 'why.'"

Zuko wasn't sure where to begin. The book was called "Pain and Pleasure," and featured a woman in a leather dominatrix outfit, wielding a whip and a candle in her hands. Beside her was a man tied to a table by his arms and legs. There were so many reasons why Zuko did not want to read this book that his mind spun with all of them.

"Just... Just no."

"But you said you would!"

"It's... It's complicated!"

"Explain yourself, Sparky, before I get _really_ mad." Toph said, crossing her arms and legs and glaring at the spot where he sat.

After another quarter of an hour of threats, pleas, and coaxing, she finally managed to get him to explain the idea of BDSM. Unfortunately for him, the idea of a fetish was so foreign to Toph that, naturally, she _had_ to know more. It was only after he'd gone from specific body types and specific ages to inflation and vore that Zuko realized that there was no way for this discussion to stay light and innocent.

The day would be seared into his mind as one of the most awkward days of his life.

When the entire conversation had ended, Zuko was seriously considering concussing himself, while Toph glowed with this newfound knowledge.

Toph had smiled as she slept that night, feeling older and wiser to the ways of the world.

Zuko had spent the night staring at the ceiling, occasionally slamming his head into the headboard.

* * *

Toph giggled at the memory.

She had to hand it to him; Sparky had a surprisingly high pain threshold.

Feeling charged and newly energized, she left her room, and, after poking the maid awake, went downstairs to listen to the radio and wait for Kuei to arrive.

* * *

When Katara got off the bus, the first thing she noticed was the red car parked in the driveway.

Zuko.

She stood there for a while, simply staring at the car.

Then she straightened her shirt, patted down her skirt, straightened her posture, and headed for the front door.

She put her hand on the knob, took a deep breath, and walked in as casually as she could, with her head held high.

"I'm home-"

"SSSSSHHHH."

Offended, she turned to stare at her brother, who was staring transfixed at the screen. Zuko was hunched forward, his eyes wide and unblinking in concentration.

With a sigh and a roll of her eyes, Katara threw her backpack onto the sofa and stood behind the two boys.

"Of course." She said with a purse of her lips.

In the Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess, there was a small mini-game called Roll-Goal, in which the player tried to roll a ball across an elevated wooden course within a set amount of time. If the ball rolled off the course, you lost. It was a simple, yet surprisingly difficult game, and one that was incredibly addictive.

It was no surprise to her that they would be playing this.

"How long have you two been going at it?"

"Two hours." Sokka replied tonelessly, without looking away.

"And you think a video game is a good reason to ignore your sister? And you, Zuko? It's rude not to acknowledge the hosts of the house you're visiting."

Both of them shushed her, too engrossed in the game to listen to her admonition.

"Hmph." Katara looked at the screen without much interest. "You both are so stupid it's not even funny."

She noted that neither of them responded.

After thirty solid seconds of terse silence, Zuko finally managed to roll the ball into the end of the course. Both boys exhaled loudly in relief.

"Oh man, that was close, I thought you were a goner for a second." Sokka patted Zuko's back. "Good work."

"I wouldn't relax just yet. The levels are getting way harder."

Katara crossed her arms and tapped her foot impatiently.

The two froze before slowly turning to look at her.

"Hello, Katara, my wonderful sister!" Sokka exclaimed loudly, reaching over the sofa and hugging her waist. "I hope you've had a wonderful day at school!"

Zuko coughed awkwardly. "Um. Hi Katara. Uh, sorry about not noticing you. It was, uh, rude of me. Err... Did you have a nice day?"

"The two of you are so pitiful, I don't even have the heart to let you continue groveling."

Katara walked into the kitchen and began to prepare snacks, mumbling under her breath about stupid boys and video games and lack of common courtesy.

Sokka and Zuko glanced at each other before snickering quietly.

"_I heard that!_"

They shut their mouths with an audible click of teeth.

* * *

Sitting on her living room floor, Suki polished the lacquered case with tender care.

The case in question was the one that held her first pair of fans. Despite the bladed edges, the instruments were more ornamental than for actual fights, used mostly for demonstrations.

As she gently rubbed the rag against the box, she contemplated.

Growing up in an all-girl's academy had not been easy on her love life.

She hadn't been sheltered- the older girls had made sure of _that_, what with their unceasing gossip- but all the same, Suki hadn't exactly had many opportunities to experience romance. Perhaps that was why, after she'd graduated, all her relationships had plummeted downhill.

Sokka had not been her first boyfriend, but the previous ones had... Well... Gone up in flames, to put it politely. Things had always gone the same way. They acted as a couple should, did the things a couple should have... So what had gone wrong?

Mike had been such a sweetheart... But he'd left her for another, older girl.

Peter was incredibly romantic... But their personalities had simply been too different. She dumped him after what had felt like their hundredth fight, on week three of their relationship.

And poor, sweet Kenji... He was in love with the idea of being in love, rather than with Suki herself. She'd ended that one as gently as she could.

"And now this," Suki thought to herself with a sigh. She carefully set down the case on the shelf. She sat on the floor, legs crossed, and rested her chin on her hand.

While she couldn't call herself naive, she also couldn't say she had experienced a _legitimate_ relationship. Perhaps that was why she'd been so angry at Sokka. Perhaps she was afraid of another unhappy ending, and had been looking for reason to get out of it before she became too emotionally invested.

"There's no reason to doubt him," she thought, blowing air out of the side of her mouth in an attempt to remove a lock of hair from her face. "He's not the type to date someone because of shallow reasons. He's just... Just..."

_He's a moron_, said a voice that sounded like both Toph and Katara.

Suki couldn't help but smile.

No, he wasn't a bad guy. Emotionally stunted, but not a bad guy.

Feeling suddenly guilty, Suki stood up and sat at her desk, preparing to do her homework. On Wednesday, after she'd taught her classes and driven Toph to the Jasmine Dragon, she'd speak to Katara about it. Then, when she drove them home, perhaps she could stop by and apologize to him about her behavior.

She would explain to him, in laymen's terms, that she had been, well, _nervous_. She would ask for forgiveness, and hopefully he would accept her after a while.

"After all," Suki thought, allowing herself a slight smile, "one never knows when it could be the real thing."

With a surge of hope, Suki began to study.

* * *

Katara set down a plate of hot, fresh cookies on the table where the boys were sitting.

They hardly noticed.

This level was the most difficult yet; it had the most obstacles, and the least amount of time with which Zuko could finish. It required a steady, dextrous hand, and if the player didn't dedicate the entirety of his mind to the task at hand, he or she was bound to lose. Zuko's focus was unwavering, but that did not mean he was guaranteed to win. He could not think about winning or failing. He could only think about his next moves, and pray that the results of his actions were favorable.

Meanwhile, Sokka was staring at the screen with as much concentration as though he were playing, himself. Although a spectator, he watched with bated breath like a basketball fan waiting for the final shoot, with four seconds left on the clock and only two points until the match was decided. He was the nervous supporter, steeling himself against an unknown outcome; would the day end in glorious victory, or should he be preparing himself for the pain of defeat?

I suppose the analogy would be more admirable if they weren't playing a freaking _video game_ involving the movement of a _glass ball_ around what is essentially _a wooden maze_. I might as well be telling you that they were playing _Pacman_, and it'd be no less pathetic. I apologize for the digression...

Anyway, by now Katara was a bit annoyed. She didn't consider herself a particularly vain person, but she _was_ quite proud of her ability to bake pastries, an art passed to her by her talented Gran-Gran. She had grown used to the mad scramble for her foods, and had even had to stop some fights breaking out... But having her cookies _ignored_?

She almost pulled the plug.

Instead, she gave a "hmph" and ate a cookie for herself. She chewed loudly, eyeing the boys.

No reaction.

They did gasp loudly at one point, but that was only because the ball had nearly rolled off the course.

Katara's eyes narrowed. She didn't expect to be showered with attention, but some acknowledgment of her existence would have been appreciated! If they were playing the game itself, she wouldn't have minded so much. But they were playing what was basically an arcade game with better graphics, and their behavior was nothing short of juvenile. She'd wanted to have a conversation with them, and maybe discuss what to do about Toph and Tomo; was that so much to ask?

...

...

... Oh for heaven's sake.

Katara picked a cookie apart into small, bite-sized pieces, the way she always ate them.

She gave up on trying to get their attention.

After a second thought, she began to tear apart the rest of the cookies. Who cared if they didn't want her food? She'd eat it herself. It had been a while since she'd actually baked something for herself, and it was a welcome experience. When the six cookies had been divided into about twenty smaller pieces, she picked up the plate with a flourish and walked into her room, spreading crumbs everywhere.

"I wash my hands of you two," Katara announced solemnly, and closed the door before she could hear the simultaneous SHH's.

* * *

After forty solid seconds of complete and total silence (punctuated only by the small movement of the controls), the ball rolled through the end of the maze. Zuko threw the controller into the air with a whoop that was echoed by Sokka. They both high fived and cheered and yelled with relief.

"Yes! I can't believe I did that!" Zuko shouted, throwing up his arms in relief.

"Dude, I have never passed that level before; you've got some skills." Sokka said, elbowing his friend's arm.

"I can't really deny that." Zuko closed his eyes tightly. "Damn, my eyes hurt."

"My neck is killing me." Sokka rubbed the aching area with a wince. "Probably from all the slouching. Hey, you smell that? Katara made cookies!"

Zuko sniffed the air, and smelled a faint but mouth watering aroma in the air.

"That smells amazing."

"Her cookies are the _best_. Hey, wait..."

Sokka craned his neck, grimaced with pain, and pulled himself over the sofa to peer into the kitchen.

"... She's not in the kitchen? The oven's not on, either. Where's the..."

Both of them turned slowly and looked at the table before them. On it was a trail of crumbs. Their eyes followed its winding path, from the table, past the bathroom and up the stairs, where the crumbs stopped outside Katara's room.

Zuko glanced at Sokka, who looked mortified.

"Oh no." he said, before vaulting over the sofa in a surprising display of athleticism. He ran up the stairs three steps each and began pounding on his sister's door.

"'Tara! 'Taraaa!" he hollered. "You have to share! You can't do this!"

Katara's response was muffled, and Zuko couldn't hear her exact words. "...! ... ... ... !"

"It was- We-" Sokka stumbled over his words, trying to find a fitting excuse. "It was the last level!"

Another muffled response. "...! ...! ...? ...!"

"Don't you dare take that tone with me, young lady!"

"... .. ...!"

"What do you _mean_ I'm using you? You're being ridiculous! It was the _last level_!" he enunciated the last two words clearly, as though it'd make her understand.

"...! ... ... ... ...!"

"Pleeeeeaaase," Sokka was all but clawing at the door now.

Zuko coughed.

"Umm. Sokka?" he said loudly.

"What." said his friend petulantly, his face still plastered against his sister's door.

"They're just cookies. No big deal."

"_No big deal?_"

To the scarred boy's surprise, the last sentence was yelled simultaneously by both siblings, the younger of which had wrenched open the door after hearing him speaking.

Sokka stood there, shocked, while Katara grabbed a large piece from the vanity in her room, marched downstairs, and forced Zuko's mouth open with one hand. With the other, she crammed the chunk of cookie inside. She let go of his jaw and put her hands on her hips, waiting.

Zuko sank his teeth into the cookie and felt his world shift.

He chewed slowly as the flavor carved itself into his memory. It was the greatest, most wonderful cookie he'd ever eaten in his entire life. The texture was soft, the chocolate rich and warm, and no other cookie would ever, ever trump this, no other cookie would ever do...

He belatedly realized that Katara had been staring at his facial expression with triumph in her eyes.

He swallowed and shrugged as nonchalantly as he could.

"Like I said, it's just a cookie, no big deal."

The shock that appeared on Katara's face gave him the strength to continue.

"You must be pretty arrogant if you think everyone's going to be so impressed by your baking."

The surprise was replaced by anger, and with a growl of frustration she stomped up the stairs and slammed the door.

Sokka's mouth hung open.

"You... You..." he stammered, pointing at first at Zuko, then at Katara's door, and back to Zuko again. He finally straightened his posture and walked down the steps and to the sofa.

He cleared his throat before he began to speak. "I have to say, I'm surprised. You're the first person who didn't have a religious experience after eating my sister's cookies."

Zuko simply stood there.

"... Zuko?"

"..."

"Zuko?"

"..."

"Hello?"

The older boy slowly turned around, horror etched in his features.

"Oh dear God, what have I done."

"HA!" Sokka pointed at him. "I knew it! You loved it!"

"I can't believe I did that."

"I can't either. What happened to staying on her good side?"

"I don't know!" Zuko sank into the seat. "I saw her face, and... I don't know! I didn't want her to _win_, and she's always so... And she's just... Argh!"

Sokka patted his arm comfortingly.

"You know, this was quite possibly the worst moment you could choose to be argumentative with my sister. She's proud of her baking, and you probably are the first person not to like it."

"It was the most delicious thing I have ever eaten in my entire life."

"And you probably won't ever get any more, unless you either grovel shamelessly."

"If there was some way for me to consume happiness, I think that was the closest I will ever get to it."

"I remember the first time Toph ate one of Katara's cream puffs. She just sat there staring into space for about ten minutes."

"I need to eat another one."

"Suki had a moment of rapture. She swears she overheard a conversation between Jesus and Buddha, although she doesn't remember what they said."

"I need, need, need, need another one."

"As for me, I think I might have built up an immunity to her food, although they still make my mouth water uncontrollably."

"I think I might die if I don't have another one."

"It makes me wonder what she puts in the stuff. I seriously wondered if she added some sort of addictive drug into the mix, although I doubt Gran-Gran would ever teach her that kind of stuff..."

"No, that's not right. I probably _will_ die if I don't have another one."

"Then again, Gran-Gran's really into Shamanistic herbs and stuff. She was born in Alaska, you know. She was what one could call an Eskimo, although she'd kill me if she heard me call her that. They're actually called the Inuit, did you know? Just a few fun facts. Anyway, I often wondered if one of her herbs had some sort of hallucinogenic effect..."

"_Sokka I am going to die_."

"No you're not, you're only going to pine and crave it for the next few days before your consciousness forcibly pushes it from your mind in an act of self-preservation, so you could actually concentrate on eating normal food. Trust me on that."

Meanwhile, Katara smiled in self-satisfaction in her room, having listened to every word of their conversation. She pushed herself up and away from the door, and began listening to music while she did her homework. The problem with Tomo could wait; after all, they'd be discussing it on Wednesday.

She'd have to take a bus there, though. After all, Wednesday was also the day she'd be starting her new job there!

Hopefully Mr. Iroh had chosen a good mentor for her.

While she trusted his judgment, she couldn't help but wish that Mr. Iroh trained her himself.

Hopefully the "experienced employee" wouldn't be mean, or a bad teacher.

* * *

Outside Katara's bedroom, the conversation had made a turn for the serious.

Sokka stared silently at the ceiling, while Zuko still had his head buried in his hands.

"Hey." Sokka poked Zuko with his foot. "Hey."

"Mmmph?"

A brief silence. Then,

"What should I do about Suki?"

Zuko looked up at this one, surprised by the sudden shift in topic.

"What do you mean?"

"I really like her, you know. I do. I guess what I said to her wasn't the smartest thing to do, given the situation, but I don't know what I can do to fix it."

Zuko didn't say anything. He didn't think he was the best person to turn to for relationship advice.

"Maybe I could grovel a little. Or maybe I could buy her some presents and say how sorry I am."

"That could work."

"But what if she seriously doesn't ever want to see me again?"

"... There's really only one way to find out, isn't there?"

Neither of them spoke for a while. The silence was interrupted only by the steady ticking of the clock above the television.

"... I really wish I had one of those cookies," Sokka said, trying to change the conversation.

Zuko groaned and covered his face with his hands again.

* * *

Day 48

It was now Wednesday.

Toph was pleased, for she had not encountered Tomo all of Tuesday, and had yet to do so today.

She was also slightly disappointed; she'd hoped to throw some gum at him, or question his masculinity in front of his peers.

Either way, it was shaping up to be an Alright Day.

Mrs. Tan, a notorious hypochondriac, had gone to the emergency room again after seeing a rash on her arm, so they no longer had English homework!

Ms. Macmu Ling, who taught Classical Literature, had a flash of inspiration and had retreated to her office to write haikus. The substitute slept all period.

All throughout lunch, Toph had made fun of Smellerbee and Longshot, accusing them of secretly dating (Smellerbee had raged and yelled, while Longshot found his sandwich _extremely_ fascinating).

Katara had been prepping herself for her new job, and Toph was positive that she would do well... Maybe one day she'd be so good at her job that Pops will give her a promotion! Then Toph could hoard free tea from her!

Yes, today was an Alright Day, she thought to herself as she waited outside for Suki to drive her to the dojo. After she'd punted around a few kids, it might even progress to a Fairly Decent Day (but not a Pretty Good Day. A Pretty Good Day was a high standard indeed.)

It was a pity, though. She'd planned on going to Aang's house yesterday, but he'd fallen asleep in class the other day and had gotten himself grounded by his grandfather. Poor guy.

Despite the setback, Toph was still determined to visit his house sometime.

It was then that she felt it; it was _him_.

She tapped her foot lightly, feeling the vibrations spread from the sidewalk and all around, changing its feel once they hit him.

Tomo was standing about twenty or so feet behind her, partially hiding himself behind a tree.

Toph's eyes narrowed. What was he doing? He was alone, and he wasn't even moving.

She tapped her foot a bit harder, concentrating on his feet.

She felt the vibrations and "saw" his feet. Yup, she was right; he was facing her. He was watching her.

... What did he want?

Toph wasn't afraid of him, but damn if it all wasn't a bit creepy.

She bent over the bench she'd been sitting on, and picked up a large pebble. She sat still for a few more moments, tapping her foot every once in a while to see if he was still there.

He shifted his weight, and for a second she thought he'd leave; unfortunately for him, he didn't. Toph turned around and lobbed the pebble as hard as she could in his general direction.

It had been meant to scare him off, rather than to hit him (she couldn't exactly _aim_, you know), so she was met with a nice surprise when the pebble hit his shin. Tomo cursed loudly and hobbled away, and it was at that moment that Suki's car drove up to the parking lot.

"Hey! Got everything ready?"

"Yup. Let's get out of here."

"Did something happen?"

"Nah. I just want to leave this dump as fast as possible."

* * *

Iroh stroked his beard thoughtfully.

Katara was an eager young thing, and had accepted her uniform (a beige shirt under a green apron) as though he'd gifted her with precious jewelry.

But where was his nephew? This attempt at match-making could not possibly succeed if both parties were not present! Oh, he'd be docking his pay if he didn't show up on time!

In the meantime, Katara was being trained by Kang, who was blushing like a madman.

Iroh eyed the boy with disapproval.

"Back off!" he'd wanted to say. "That girl belongs to my nephew."

Instead, he would give him more things to do.

"So," Kang mumbled, looking everywhere accept at Katara, "You're basically the waitress. We don't have a set system here, but back when Tim worked here, that's what he did."

Katara nodded, eager to prove that she could uphold her end of the work.

"H-have you ever worked as a waitress before?"

"Umm, not officially, but I _did_ serve food and take orders at my grandmother's restaurant..."

"It shouldn't be too hard, then. Just write down what they want and try to avoid spilling their drinks when you give it to them."

Katara giggled at that, and Kang turned even redder.

Iroh frowned, and walked to the counter where they had been speaking.

"Thank you, Kang." He patted the boy roughly on his back. "I will take it from here."

"But I-"

"Go back to the kitchen, Kang."

He walked away, dragging his feet, and Iroh turned to Katara with a jovial expression on his face.

"I'm sorry about that! Anyway, I'm surprised my ne- I mean, my older worker isn't here yet. I'd hoped he'd be the one to teach you."

"Oh, that's alright, Mr. Iroh! I've already done work as a waitress before, and he already told me the important rules."

"Oh he has, has he?"

Katara nodded enthusiastically.

"Only use teabags when there's absolutely nothing left, Never ever be rude to the customers unless you are the senior employee, and Never interrupt a Pai Sho game." She counted off her fingers as she spoke.

"Ah, but he didn't tell you Rule Number Four! No matter how strange or... ah... _familiar_ a customer may be, a customer is still a customer, and you must treat him or her as such."

"Familiar?" Katara tilted her head. "Ooh, like, if I see someone I know, I can't be too friendly with them, or treat them differently?"

"Err... Yeah! That sums it up fairly well, thank you." Iroh smiled at her. "It's just that... The Jasmine Dragon attracts a wide variety of people."

"I won't let you down, sir! Thank you so much for giving me this opportunity."

He almost felt bad for giving her this job for the sole reason for trying to get her with his nephew. Almost.

Speaking of his nephew, just where on earth _was_ he?

* * *

"You know," Sokka said, "This is the third day in a row you've come over to my house to play a _game_."

Zuko shrugged as he shot a cannon through an ice monster.

"As much as I support your newfound love for this particular franchise, I can't help but worry that you might be neglecting your duties for the sake of the game."

"Don't be ridiculous."

"Whatever you say!"

* * *

"... And this," Iroh said, pointing at the lavender boxes on the very end of the cabinet, "Is where the black teas are kept. They are organized by country of origin and by overall worth."

Katara made carefully wrote this down in her notepad.

"Now, seeing as you are the waitress, you won't have to worry too much about where everything is located. However, on extremely busy days, you may have to assist the senior employee. He does all the cooking and brewing."

"Okay. Out of curiosity, what does Kang do?"

"He was the waiter before you came along, but he also made sure the teas were drinkable and the floors were clean."

Katara put the notepad into her pocket and patted down her apron.

"It must have been difficult," She looked up at Iroh. "Having only two people work here. It's not a big place, but it's still too big to be run by only two employees."

Iroh shrugged nonchalantly. "It is not so bad. We have a steady flow of customers, and most people only want a drink. When it became too crowded, I helped out, myself. Although," he frowned suddenly. "We are going to be in trouble if he does not get here before the regulars arrive."

* * *

"... Okay, now what?"

"You target him, roll behind, and smash the crystal on his back with your sword."

"..."

"..."

"Okay, now?"

"Now go back to the other room, take control of the statue, and place it on the switch."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"..."

"Alright, now?"

"Run past the spike traps and the big statue should be there, waiting for you."

There was a sudden buzzing noise, and Sokka reached into his pocket.

"Hello?"

"Hey, Snoozles! How are you?"

"Meh. How are you?"

"I'm just peaches and cream right now."

"Hey, Toph, you're with Suki right now, right?"

"Uh, yeah."

"Is she still mad at me?"

"One moment."

"_Wait!_" Sokka yelled, surprising Zuko and nearly making him lose.

Sokka stuck a finger in his other ear to drown out the chain of curses streaming from the scarred boy's mouth.

"What?" asked Toph.

"Don't ask her!"

"Then how am I supposed to know?"

"Can't you just... tell?"

"What am I, psychic, now?"

"Argh! Would she be willing to talk to me, or should I give her some more space?"

There was silence on the other end, and for a moment he feared that Toph had gone to Suki anyway.

"You know what, her class is almost over anyway, Snoozles. Why don't you come over to the Jasmine Dragon in about twenty minutes, and you can talk to her there?"

"... Alright. Thanks a lot, Toph."

"No problem."

Sokka snapped his phone shut and turned to his friend.

"Dude, I need you to give me a ride to Iroh's tea shop."

Zuko suddenly went very, very, pale.

"... Dude?"

"Oh, shit."

Zuko abruptly dropped the controller as though it burned him and stood up.

"I'm fucked."

"What's wrong?"

"I was supposed to be there nearly two hours ago!"

"... Oh yeah, you work there, don't you?"

"My uncle's going to kill me!"

Zuko suddenly turned on him.

"This is your fault!"

"What?"

"If you hadn't gotten me into that stupid, stupid game-"

Sokka shook him roughly by the shoulder. "Snap out of it, man!"

"You're right. I- I have to go."

"I'm going with you, I gotta get there myself."

"Okay! Just hurry up!"

Zuko all but flew out the door, and Sokka scrambled to catch up with him.

* * *

Two hours!

Iroh sighed.

He'd been gone _two hours_!

He wasn't sure whether to be worried or not.

His nephew was such an... An _independent_ boy, always carrying his burdens like a martyr, refusing to let anyone help... What if he just happened to snap from all the pressure of school and his... Personal problems?

He poured the tea into the china and rang the bell. Katara rushed inside, gingerly lifted the plate, and left just as quickly, careful not to spill a drop.

Iroh couldn't help but smile at her enthusiasm. She was one of the few people he'd ever met who reveled in having something to do. He, on the other hand... Iroh's smile was replaced by a pout as he began to brew another order. As much as he loved making tea, he could have been playing Pai Sho by now! He much preferred walking around the tables, interacting with the customers and actually _drinking_ the tea he made.

His nephew would have to be disciplined. Perhaps he could make him mop the floors? No, that was much too commonplace.

A mischievous smile slowly formed on Iroh's face as he began to cook up an appropriate punishment for his senior employee.

* * *

Katara was having the time of her life. She hadn't worked since she'd helped out at Gran-Gran's small restaurant, and she couldn't help but feel nostalgic as she walked through the aisles and took orders. And everyone here was so _nice_!

"Hello there!" an elderly man had greeted her a few minutes earlier, "I haven't seen you around here before! Is it your first day?"

"Oh, I see Iroh has hired a new waitress!" a woman had said with a smile.

Similar greetings echoed throughout the cafe as Katara continued to serve tea.

"Here's your napkin, sir!" she said to a Pai Sho player, grinning from ear to ear.

She heard the bell ring and turned to face the door.

"Welcome to the-"

She stopped when she saw Zuko run behind the counter.

"... Zuko?"

He whirled around, his apron halfway on his body.

"Katara? What are you-" He then noticed what she was wearing. "You... You work here now?"

"_You're_ the senior employee?"

"_You work here now?_"

She crossed her arms, an accusatory look on her features. "Yes, yes I do. Is there a problem with that?"

"_Why_?"

She opened her mouth to make a rude comment when Iroh stuck his head out of the kitchen, smiling widely.

"Hello, Zuko! You are quite late, you know. What is your excuse?"

Zuko didn't turn away from Katara.

"Sorry, Uncle. I, uh, was a bit... Preoccupied."

"Oh please!" Katara put her hands to her hips. "I'll be you he was at my house, playing video games with my brother."

The boy winced, and turned to his uncle, who gave him a look that said, "You can't be serious."

Zuko opened his mouth to argue, but was interrupted when Sokka slumped through the door, panting heavily.

"Geez... You... You need to... Calm down..." He huffed and puffed, his hands on his knees. He looked up and saw his sister. "'Tara? What- What are you doing here?"

He eyed her uniform.

"Wh- _You're working here_?" he exclaimed loudly, causing many patrons' heads to turn.

"Will you shut up?" Katara hissed.

She grabbed her brother by the wrist and dragged him to a small table, pushing him onto a seat.

"Don't you dare move from there until I finish my shift." Her eyes narrowed dangerously before she briskly turned and left him.

Sokka sat there uncomfortably, looking awkward and pretending not to notice everyone's eyes on him.

Zuko and Iroh watched the scene with amusement, until Iroh grabbed his nephew by the ear and dragged him into the kitchen.

"Ow! Ouch! Let go!"

"A video game? Honestly, nephew, that is just sad."

"... Can I blame Sokka for this?"

"No."

Zuko sighed.

"I'm... getting punished for this, aren't I." It was more of a statement than a question.

Iroh nodded gravely.

"I'm going to have to mop the floors after hours again, right?"

Another nod.

"Also," Iroh smiled wickedly. "You will also be training Katara."

Zuko looked up at this.

"I'd really rather not."

"Nonsense! You've worked here the longest, and you won't stay forever! _Someone_ has to learn to make the teas!"

"Can't I just... Have my pay docked or something?"

Iroh cocked an eyebrow.

"Why would I do that? Training Katara is not part of the punishment. Would you like me to inform her that you think of her that way?"

"It's not like that! I just... Don't think it'd be a good idea for us to be in close quarters. She doesn't like me, and the only reason I even try to be civil with her is because I was a jerk to her several times before."

With a groan, Zuko turned away from his uncle and began setting pots of water to boil, effectively ending the conversation.

Iroh chuckled.

He hadn't quite understood their relationship before, but now... Now he understood.

Oh, this _would_ be fun.

* * *

**(A/N): ... Yeah, umm. This is still a Taang, guys. Oh, and I'm still taking requests for cameos and stuff, if you're into it (totally not a way to win back favor from angry readers)? It doesn't have to be someone from the ATLA world. Again, thank you for reading, feel free to lash out at me in your reviews, and I hope you have a Super Mega Radically Awesome day!**


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